Rough Around the Edges
by Twilightsavedme
Summary: What do you do when a man shakes up what you thought was your perfect world? Bella thinks she's close to her happily ever after...But what will happen when she meets someone who is homeless, estranged from his family, without love for so long...yet he knows in his heart what he feels for her is real. (Beta-d by Sunflower Fran)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers**

 **Rough Around the Edges**

 **What do you do when a man shakes up what you thought was your perfect world? Bella thinks she's close to her happily ever after...But what will happen when she meets someone who is homeless, estranged from his family, without love for so long...yet he knows in his heart what he feels for her is real.**

Chapter 1

Edward

"Are you okay over there son?" I hear the husky voice of my longtime friend. I bundle up with more covers and nod to him curtly.

"Never better Carlisle", I say with sarcasm, my words come out choppy through shuttering teeth. It's fucking cold and the shelter is full so Carlisle and I are forced to sleep under the bridge again.

"This is your fault, you know that right."

I roll my eyes. He's not trying to make me feel bad; he's just tired of this happening.

"Thanks, Carlisle. I feel shitty enough without you pointing that out, "I reply looking over in time to catch him shrugging.

"Feeling any better,"He asks as he comes over and feels my forehead with the back of his hand. I nod, but he checks my neck too. "Burning up again. "He mutters.

He says I'm hot, but I feel cold as hell. This is the second day that I've been sick, but I refuse to go to the hospital. Carlisle holds his hand out in a fist.

"Take these," He urges me to lift my hand so I concede as he drop in two pills. He then hands me a bottle of water and gives me a pointed look urging me to take the pills.

I don't ask how he got them because it would get me nowhere. Carlisle always went out of his way to take care of me. I feel more like his son than his friend, given our age difference.

The pills lull me to sleep instantly washing away the night and bringing about another day.

A new day.

I get to see her again.

She keeps me going. She keeps me holding onto the dream that one day Carlisle and I will be out of this shit hole. She gives me so much inspiration and yet...I don't even know her name.

The past two nights I missed out on chances to be in the warm environment of the homeless shelter just to see her. I had to see her so her beauty could inspire peace of mind, and most importantly, give me hope. I desperately wanted to love and be loved.

Just thinking about her makes me smile. Her beauty caused my heart to beat out of my chest. I have to hold my hand there every time I see her.

Carlisle always waits for me at our usual spot, and he didn't want to leave me hanging so he waited and waited, even though he knew where I would be. He always knows. Yet he never rushed me, and he never left me. Even when I came down with the flu, he took care of me like a son.

"Edward wake up. They put out the bread," Carlisle said and I heard it through my sleep. Carlisle and I chose this particular spot because it covered us in case it rained and also because this bakery throws out bread that they deem expired.

They do it pretty much every morning. Sometimes I eat and sometimes I don't. However, this morning I ate out of necessity. I needed food because I was drained and this would give me the much-needed energy to brave the long walk to see her.

Today I would speak to her. That brought a smile to my face and pep in my step.

Carlisle and I ate the bread and when I finish I instantly felt ready to begin my day.

"I'm going to talk to her today,"I tell Carlisle once I'm done eating.

He nods but frowns and I catch it. Eagerly I ask if that's the wrong thing to do.

"No, I'm not saying that it's a bad idea I just...," He trails off.

"Spill it old man," I push for his advice.

"Do what makes you happy son," He braces an arm on my shoulder and smiles a smile that I have no choice but to return.

I remember when I first met Carlisle almost three years ago. He was in a diner with his last couple of dollars from his past life. The life that he said he doesn't regret leaving.

His wife was killed, and it shook his world. He was no longer able to function in society. He didn't even set up the arrangement for her funeral, leaving it to his wife's siblings. He said that he couldn't bear to see her like that, cold and lifeless.

He took his car and drove, leaving his dead wife, his job, his possessions and all of his troubled family behind.

He ended up in Seattle trying to flee the feeling of guilt. He blamed himself for her death saying that he should have protected her. He beat himself up about it for years until he found me. We had something in common. He sensed our familiar spirit. We both held a tremendous amount of guilt.

My story had been just as bad as his except I had nowhere to run. I'd killed my stepfather at the young age of thirteen. I'd like to say that it was an accident, but it wasn't. I had watched him beat my mother for years, but he never laid a hand on me or his son Emmett, who was fifteen and quite big for his age. He wouldn't hit a man, but he thought that it was okay to beat the most important woman in my life.

I couldn't continue to sit back and watch him beat her. Emmett didn't want to go against his father so he usually just stayed in his room and tried to block out his stepmother's cries. I couldn't. Hearing my mother beg him to stop and plead with him angered me but it riled him up even more.

One day I had enough. His dinner was cold because he'd been in his study working all night. He told me to go in my room, and I knew what was about to happen when my mother winced. She knew what was coming and she was bracing herself.

Instead of going in my room, I went back into the dining room and peeked around the corner. I heard my mother's cries along with his slaps that connected with her face. I couldn't stand to listen anymore. I couldn't stand to see him beat the living shit out of my mother any longer.

I pushed off the wall and lunged at him. My mother pleaded for me to stop and she cried harder which fueled my anger. This was his fault. Her constant tears were his fault.

Pushing him back and away from my mother onto the counter near the kitchen sink. I stared into his eyes as he gripped my upper arms to pry me away from him. I was so filled with anger I made a quick decision to end his life and inevitably end my mother's suffering.

I grabbed a knife off the counter and stabbed him. I then released him, coming to terms with what I had just done. With wide eyes, I backed away from him and glanced at my mom. She screamed an agonizing scream as she crawled over to him and applied pressure to his wound.

I still remember the look on her face when she looked at me. It haunts me. She looked at me how I'd seen her look at him so many times.

She was scared.

Of me.

I remember looking at my hands and thinking that I was no better than him. I ran out the front door at full speed and disappeared.

I was angry that she was trying to help him after what he had done. I was mad at myself for what I had done.

I haven't seen my family since, choosing to continue to keep my distance and live with my guilt.

"I say go for it," Carlisle brings me out of my trance. I shake my head looking over at him.

"I am," I say as I stand and smooth down my jeans hoping that I look and smell presentable. "I'll try to be on time tonight," I tell him and he snorts but nods as he continues to eat. I salute him and fix my shirt as I begin to walk towards the corner where I usually see her.

She's always impeccably dressed with her brown hair flowing in lazy waves down her back. Her big brown eyes seem to reach deep down into my soul every time she glances at me, and I like to think that the smile she always gives me is reserved for only me.

Today was no different. I see her walking across the street towards me with purposeful strides. I'm left standing there with my mouth wide open gawking at her.

She passes me, staring down at her phone as she walks into the cafe. I mentally slap myself. I missed my chance.

But then I remember that she has to leave the cafe. I can try then.

I clear my throat and straighten myself, casually standing by the door. I see a man smoking a cigarette outside of the cafe and think it's a way to waste some time. I ask him for one and he gives it to me, offering to light it as well.

I stand there smoking the cigarette, waiting patiently. I start to lose my nerve and think about trying again tomorrow when suddenly, she steps out of the cafe with a coffee cup in one hand and her phone in the other.

I watch her, losing my nerve as I always do when I see her face. I stare at her, looking her up and down, mesmerized.

She looks around and then smiles as a short, raven-haired woman waves at her. The woman was beautiful as well, but she couldn't hold a candle to my girl.

"Bella,"The girl says as she continues to wave and I continue to stare.

Her name is Bella. How fitting.

I turn slightly, trying not to make it so obvious that I'm eavesdropping on the strangers.

They walk with their arms intertwined back into the coffee shop and I turn, looking into the window at her. She laughs and smiles so carefree and my heart swells.

And then her friend catches me. She catches me staring and raises an eyebrow before turning her attention back to Bella.

I just have to see her one more time and then I'll leave. I look again and the raven-haired girl is staring at me with her arms crossed, and a knowing smile on her face.

I drop the cigarette in the nearby can and begin to walk away. Had the raven-haired girl thought that I wanted her attention? That wasn't the case. Not that she wasn't good looking; it's just that I was solely interested in her friend.

I noted that she came to this cafe multiple times a day and frequently walked down this street. So I always waited here hoping to be noticed. Hoping to be seen.

I make it back to Carlisle after absentmindedly roaming around town for hours. I felt kind of like a coward.

I told Carlisle about my uneventful day and he gave encouraging words. He urged me to try again saying I won't know until I try.

How accurate

The next day I wait and wait and she doesn't show. With both hands in my pockets, I kick rocks around on the sidewalk idly, as I think about her.

Then I begin to torture myself with endless possibilities. She saw me watching her and she's scared, that's why she hasn't shown. I basically stalked this woman, so why wouldn't she be afraid of me?

I kick more rocks as thoughts swirl around in my brain. Anger, frustration and confusion consume me. I would never have a chance with someone so beautiful, so high class, so much better than me.

"Hi," I'm startled out of my daze by a woman's voice and I kick a rock in that direction. "Ouch! Fuck, that hurt", The rock must have hit her foot.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Are you okay", I squat down to look at her foot. I examine her without touching her before looking back up. I stand slowly, recognizing her as the woman from yesterday.

"I'm fine. It just hit my foot, no worries", She waves it off. She then points at me with squinted eyes. "You like my friend." It wasn't a question.

I look away nervously, embarrassed from being caught. I rub the back of my neck trying to think of how to explain.

"Was it that obvious," I ask her and she chuckles.

"To me, yes. To her, no. I've seen you looking at her before, though", She tells me and I try to think back to all of the times that I've looked for Bella. I can't recall ever seeing this person. "Why don't you just talk to her? She won't bite", she laughs and I just stand there unsure why she's telling me this. "I'm Alice by the way," She holds her hand out to me to shake.

"Edward,"I say as I shake her hand. When I release her, I place both of my hands in my pockets and rock back on my heels looking around her to see if Bella is nearby. I catch her eyes in time to see her rolling them with a smile.

"She's out of town right now. But I knew you would be here. You're always here." She looks me over with scrutiny.

"I live nearby," I answer her quickly, pointing down the street.

"Ahh," She says. "Nothing to do with you trying to catch a glimpse of my friend," She asks with a raised eyebrow. She caught me again. "Hey, come have coffee with me. I hate sitting alone."

I nod but don't move towards the door. She catches my hesitation and looks at me quizzically.

"I'm a stranger. Why would you want to-", I question her but she interrupts me.

"Stop talking." She grabs my arm pulling me into the cafe and into the line. "As many times as I've seen you standing outside this place, I've never seen you inside. Do you drink coffee", She asks.

I do, but I don't have the money to pay for it. I nod at her letting her know that I do. "Would you like a cup?" She asks and I don't speak. She senses my hesitation again. "On me of course," She says sweetly. Why is she nice to a complete stranger? I'm not used to this.

I tell her thanks and she looks away, but I catch the pleased smile on her face. She strikes me as the kind of girl that is used to getting her way all of the time.

"I'll order for us. Can you grab a table", She asks and I nod and shove my hands in my pockets walking over to an empty table in the corner. I stare out the window feeling slightly uncomfortable.

"Here," She puts the coffee in front of me. "I hope you like it,"She says and I thank her again.

We sit in silence, mostly with her staring at me with a smile on her face. "Your friend...", I start to ask and she gives me an encouraging smile. I clear my throat trying to think of how to ask my question. "...Bella", She nods still holding onto that smile. She brings the coffee cup to her lips taking a drink. "Is she joining us."

"No silly. I told you that she was out of town", She answers quickly. I remember her saying that, but I can't think of any reason why she would be so nice to a stranger.

I look down at my cup of coffee, slightly disappointed. "Why are you so nice to me? You don't know me. I could be a murderer." I tell her and my nostrils flare when I think about the fact that I technically am one.

"You're not," She says simply. I furrow my eyebrows at her. "I'm an excellent judge of character." She nods and then looks me over. "You just look like a guy that fell on hard times."

I hate to tell her my impression of her as I stare at her name-brand purse and designer outfit.

The old me, the teenage me, the version of me that would do anything to make it on the streets would have snatched her purse by now and bought cigarettes and whatever Carlisle might need.

Carlisle used to be disappointed in me for my poor decisions.

"Thank you for this again,"I tell her and she shrugs.

"I dragged you in here. It's the least that I can do." She says pleased with herself. "So you said that you live around here?" She looks between my eyes. Something about the way she looks at me tells me that she's probing. Like she knows something already. "House? Apartment"

I clear my throat feeling antsy as I squirm in my seat. I hate explaining my situation to people. Either they give me sympathy or they judge me harshly as if to say there's no excuse for my situation. I equally hated both reactions.

"I'm in between places right now," I tell her and she looks down at her cup. It's the truth. I'm in between living under a bridge and living in the homeless shelter.

"Ummm", she sips her drink. "Well, Bella likes well-groomed guys," She says and I glance down at my appearance then back into her eyes.

I sit there speechless. "I…I" I try to explain, but her laughter cuts me off.

"It's okay Edward." She says then she touches my hair and I freeze. "We can get you a much-needed haircut and shave."

I frown, confused by her words. Then she pushes my hair out of my face completely. "You're actually quite handsome behind all of this hair." She rests her head on her arm staring at me, studying my face.

"I'm sorry. Did I miss something", I ask her confused as to what's going on.

She sighs. "My friend, Bella, is a good person. A kind-hearted person." She sighs. "And she's in love with a jerk."

My heart drops and my ears begin to ring. Suddenly it's hard to breathe. "They are engaged, "She tells me and I close my eyes trying to remember her face, attempting to remember if I saw a ring on her finger.

I never got that far. I was always too focused on her beautiful face, and her angelic presence. I exhale loudly through my nose out of frustration and heartbreak.

"I know that look," She says to me sadly. "You love her without even knowing her."

I nod.

"This asshole will ruin her life, but she's seemingly stuck on him. He doesn't treat her well either", she tells me and I grip the table. My anger taking over me.

"Why are you telling me this," I ask her through gritted teeth.

"Because I see how you look at her. You adore her." She gives my hand a sympathetic squeeze.

"You don't think that I'm a creep?"

I patiently wait for her answer. "No, I don't. I think that you would be a breath of fresh air for her. God knows that no man has ever stood out in the cold just to get a glance of her."

"I was going to talk to her yesterday,"I confess. Thinking back on how furious I was at myself for chickening out.

"I'm glad you didn't," She tells me and I furrow my eyebrows at her. Isn't that what she wants me to do. "You're a little rough around the edges," She plucks at my shirt and I flinch away quickly. "Sorry", she moves her hand. "Let me know when and if I get too friendly. Sometimes I forget." She laughs at herself. "Do we have a deal?"

"Deal?" I ask her again still confused. I thought this was her way of telling me to back off because Bella's engaged.

She sighs heavily exasperatedly. "Haven't you been listening?" I nod and she rolls her eyes. "I just need you to sweep her off her feet, which shouldn't be hard because I can tell that you absolutely adore her," she blinks.

"What do you get out of this,"I question. How can I trust her? And why does she trust me?

She shrugs. "The satisfaction of knowing that my friend isn't marrying a complete douche. You, with your looks, coupled with the very raw feelings that you must have for her should rattle her enough to make her question her love for him", She explains.

"And if it doesn't work,"I ask her after a long pause as I sit and begin to try to process her words.

"It will work,"She tells me.

"What if it doesn't,"I ask again and she smiles and pats my hand.

"If you love her, you won't give up. That's the point of picking someone with actual feelings for her. I was going to go to an escort or a dating service, second-guessing my plans because I figured these guys would break her heart if she actually fell for them...but you? You won't break her heart", She tells me and I nod understanding. This is what I want right? A chance. Alice could give me that chance. I definitely won't have a chance if she gets married.

I close my eyes thinking hard about the possibility of this blowing up in my face...then I think out loud with a shrug. "What do I have to lose."

A big smile graces her face and she stands quickly hugging my shoulders. I freeze; not used to affection especially not from strangers.

"Will you agree to a makeover?" She asks with a raised eyebrow and a hand on her hip.

"Will it hurt?"I ask and she laughs a full throaty laugh as if she was not expecting a question like that.

"You and I are going to be great friends Edward, "She tells me through her laughter and I smile slightly.

We leave the cafe shortly after Alice's laughing fit with plans to meet the next day to start what she deemed as 'training' and I inwardly freak out when she says that she'll need to see where I live.

That night Carlisle is surprised that I make it in time. "Don't look so surprised old man,"I tell him and he laughs patting me on my back as we walk to the shelter.

I don't tell Carlisle what happened because I'm afraid of what he'll say. I think he'll try to talk me out of it.

Carlisle and I do talk about a few things. He tells me that he was approached by a private investigator and that he had some choice words for the guy.

"Then he gives me this,"Carlisle holds up a letter. "My brothers are looking for me."

I shrug. "You should be flattered. At least someone is looking for you." I left my home almost twelve years ago and haven't seen or heard from my family since.

Carlisle pats my back sympathetically but moves his hand quickly when I brush it off. I'm not trying to be rude; I just really hate sympathy and pity.

"Who's to say that your mother hasn't looked for you everyday son, "He says and I nod."I'm glad that you feel better," and I nod again.

"I feel a lot better thank you,"I tell him as we finish our dinner. I go to bed thinking about the 'deal' that Alice and I have.

I'm starting to think I'll be better off waiting until I see her in front of the cafe and attempt to talk to her myself, but then Alice's words ring in my ears. She likes well-groomed men. Reminds me that I'm homeless and unkempt.

This is my way in. My only opportunity with her. My chance at love.

 **All thanks to the spectacular beta skills of Frannie Walsh! You are a life saver :)**

 **Please join my Facebook group [Twilightsavedme]**

 **Thank you all for reading. To avoid confusion, I must tell you that this is a re-write of my story Rugged. Only a few things will be different in the beginning, but as the chapters are posted, more of the plot will be noticeable different. Thanks again. Drop a review if you can. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for your support it really keeps me going. Please review.

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Chapter 2:

"Are we almost there? You said you lived nearby," Alice questions after we leave the cafe and I'm instantly annoyed. I'm not used to having company outside of Carlisle, and I hate explaining myself.

"Almost there," I tell her as we round a corner and I see the bridge. Her eyes widen when I stop and I stare at her, waiting for her to tell me that this whole thing was a mistake. I wouldn't blame her for it. She doesn't want her friend with a loser like me. "Home sweet home." I welcome her with outstretched arms even though there is nothing welcoming about this dump.

She takes a few steps, glancing around with a look of annoyance. "Charming." She says looking around. "Makes sense now," She mutters.

I'm not particularly upset at the moment, but the habit takes over as I stretch my arms above my head, then reach back, gripping my hair in frustration. I leave my hands there, and shake my head at her.

I'm not sure I even want to do this anymore.

"This isn't going to work Alice."

She holds her face in her hands and sighs deeply.

"This can work," She says quickly. I sigh heavily. She's worried about her friends heartbreak, but I'm thinking about mine. Getting that close to Bella, getting to know more about her is going to make me fall deeper in love with her. I feel like I'm setting myself up for failure and inevitable heartbreak.

"Alice, if this works she's going to want to see my place eventually, right? I have nothing to offer her." She knows that I'm right. I see the look of trepidation, as she chews her thumbnail thoughtfully.

She exhales and closes her eyes. "I will think of something. This is just a minor setback."

"Minor setback? I'm homeless. This is insane. "Go home Alice." I start to walk away.

"You're just going to give up? " She yells, her arms outstretched, her eyebrows set in a deep furrow that tells me she's not too happy with my decision to quit. "You're just going to watch her from a distance? Love her from a distance? Is that it?"

I walk back up to Alice. "Does her fiancé have a home?" I ask coolly and Alice nods. "Money?" She nods again. "A career?" She nods yet again.

What was I thinking? I shake my head and start to walk away again. I shout back at Alice as I walk away. "Your friend is better off. Get out of here Alice!"

"You're making a big mistake." Alice shouts to my back, but I keep walking. The mistake would be taking her away from a life full of happiness and bringing her into a life of poverty.

The next day I go back to the cafe hoping to catch a glimpse of her. I didn't know if she was back from her trip yet, but I was hoping.

I wouldn't dare try to talk to her again but seeing her would surely help dull the ache in my chest. At least until tomorrow. Then I'll have to see her again, or all purpose for living will fade.

Unfortunately, she doesn't show, but Alice does. She stops right in front of me with her hands in her jacket pockets. I open my mouth to ask her what she wants when she speaks.

"She's out of town the entire weekend." She tells me and my face drops. "Planning her wedding." She's twisting the knife. "The wedding that you won't help me stop."

"Maybe it's for the best." I push out with a shaky breath.

"Or you're just a stubborn idiot." She snaps.

I step into her space, glaring down at her five foot nothing petite frame. There's a midget worth of height between us, and she speaks to me without any fear. She's so small; I could probably flick her across the street without much effort.

"You don't know me." I snap back at her. I'm trying not to ruin her friend's life. I'm being selfless. Apparently, love makes you do shit like that.

"I know enough." She holds her head high as she speaks.

"Because you're such a good judge of character." I fold my arms across my chest and continue to glare at her.

She takes a deep breath with closed eyes. "What if you're who she's meant to be with?" My head drops. "What if fate is just messing with you guys?"

My eyes lift to her face to see her very hopeful expression. I shake my head at her theory. I can't afford to believe it.

I break eye contact momentarily, scoffing obnoxiously. I hold my hands out towards her in a gesture that should make her feel stupid because this plan is ridiculous.

"This is all hypothetical Alice? You know that right?" I may sound like a bit of an asshole, but the more she talks, the more she gets my hopes up, and it's causing me to lash out. "Why put all of this effort into something that may not work?" I ask her roughly. I was torn just thinking about the possibility that what she's saying is true.

"What if I told you that I had a vision," she says and I blank. This is what she comes up with? I shove a hand through my hair coming to the conclusion that she's crazy. I start to walk away, but she grabs my arm. "Wait"

I turn again slowly to face her. "Let me guess, you can see the future," I say sarcastically scratching my head.

"Something like that," she whispers and makes a face as if she can't believe it herself. "It was like, Déjà vu but it may have been a dream. I saw you."

I scratch the back of my head and start to turn again. "Goodbye Alice."

She grabs my arm again. "Edward?" I stop walking, but I don't turn. "He's dangerous, and she's not safe with him. She thinks she can handle him, tame him, but she can't." Alice says and again I become angry.

The one button I have and she pushes it as if she knows my past.

"Bella used to be strong and tough and she's my best friend. Choosing you would be the lesser of two evils. So if I have to..."Her voice breaks as I hear her tears. I turn to face her. "If I have to clean you up it's so much better than the alternative."

"How can you be sure that she'll even want me," I ask after a long pause taking a step back towards her. She frantically wipes at her tears.

"She's a hopeless romantic," Alice says trying to force a smile. "She loves, love. And you love her so..."

"You're sure that she doesn't really love him," I ask her. This would be my deciding factor.

"Bella is in love with the person that she believes he can be. A good man. An honest man. He will never be that."

"How do you know that?" I have to be sure of everything.

"Because he's my cousin."

***R A T E***

Later that day Alice takes me to a hotel room. It's pretty standard with two, full-sized beds, dresser, TV, and mini fridge.

"This is where all of the magic will happen," She says as she shrugs out of her coat laying it neatly on one of the beds.

"Great,"I say with mock enthusiasm and she rolls her eyes.

"You ever thought about getting a job,"She asked me as she takes a water bottle out of the fridge.

I shrug. "I worked a few dead end jobs over the years." I shrug again. "There's nothing to work for."

"How about a better life," She says before taking a drink of water.

"This life is better because you have money?" I ask her. Sort of offended by her assumption that she's happier because she has money.

"I have stability," She says not noticing my exasperated tone.

"And I don't?" I ask and she shakes her head no, as if she knows anything about me.

"No, you don't. You wander around from place to place with no purpose-" She tries to say, but I interrupt her.

"Remember this is the life you're trying to give to your friend," I say in a way that makes her almost choke on her water.

"Bella has money of her own," Alice says as if that would calm my worries.

"And I'm supposed to provide her undying love in exchange for what? Stability?"

"In exchange for _her_ love." Alice says as if it's that simple. "Come on," she grabs my arm and pulls me to the bathroom. "Shower, wash your hair, shave, and meet me back out here, okay, go." Then she closes the door leaving me alone.

I don't get to shower often so I'm actually excited. It also gives me time to think about what I'm getting myself into. I feel like I'm in way over my head.

A while later I'm finished with the tasks Alice had for me and I step out of the bathroom wearing a robe. I see Alice sitting on the bed with her legs crossed scrolling through her phone. She looks up when she hears me and smiles brightly.

She prances over to me grabbing my hand swiftly, pulling me over to sit me in a rolling chair in front of a mirror.

"Yes, all of that facial hair gone." She says smiling at me in the mirror. She then stares at my head, slowly bringing scissors into my vision.

"How much are you cutting,?" I ask as she lightly runs her hands through my damp hair.

"Most of it." She replies chipperly. I haven't cut my hair in ages. I nod at her understanding that it's necessary.

She runs the hair through a comb and begins to cut. Looking at myself in the mirror as she cuts, I must say that I look a lot better. It's amazing how much a little less hair can change your appearance.

She steps back proud of herself. "You look hot," she says while fanning herself and I roll my eyes. "She's not going to recognize you at all."

"Thanks," I say sarcastically. Did I look that shitty before? And to think I was going to talk to her while looking that bad. "Do you have a toothbrush," I ask knowing that's something that needs to be done.

"There's a new one on the counter. Help yourself. I'm going shopping," She says as she goes into the bathroom and grabs my clothes studying the tags.

"You could just ask for my size,"I tell her and she sticks her tongue out at me.

"Figured you didn't know your size,"She confesses before walking out of the door. Then she peeks back in. "Don't you dare think about leaving, "She says before slamming the door shut.

Hours passed before Alice returns, and this time she's not alone. There's a tall leggy blonde with her and she stares at me for a long time. I swear I've seen her before at the cafe with Bella.

"Alice!" The blonde smacks Alice's arm. "You're setting Bella up with this hottie? What about me? I've been damn good to you."

I stand there awkwardly trying to pretend that I don't hear them discussing me.

"Fuck you're hot! How do you make it down the street without women ripping off your clothes?" She comes and lays a hand on my chest. I want to tell her it's because other than today it had been weeks since I'd showered. No woman wants to touch that.

"I'm Rosalie. The _other_ friend." She holds out a hand and I shake it.

"Stop throwing yourself at him. He loves Bella," Alice says pulling Rosalie away.

"He doesn't know her," Rosalie says to Alice, but her eyes stay on me. "Find her someone else."

"Rosalie!" Alice shouts finally gaining her attention. "Are you going to help me or not?" Alice asks Rosalie and I see her bow her head.

"Fine! But I better meet a hot guy. Hotter than him." She folds her arms across her chest and glares at me. This chick is hot and cold. I step away from her burning glare.

Alice shoves clothes in my face catching me off guard. "Go put these on."

She'd bought me dark blue, True Religion jeans, a crisp white shirt to go under a brown leather jacket.

I step out of the bathroom and both of their mouths drop. I try to ignore them salivating over my looks because I'm really not used to it and I don't want it to go to my head. I've always been, and will remain, a humble man.

"Is this acceptable?"I ask with my arms outstretched to give them a complete veiw.

"Acc...ceptable?" Rosalie practically drools all over the floor.

"It was hardly any work with you. You're perfect," Alice says and I smile, accepting the compliment the only way that I know how.

"Acceptable?" Rosalie asks again in a much louder voice. "Did you not look in the mirror?"

"Rose!" Alice chastises. Rose seemingly snaps out of it and starts examining her nails. She does glance at me every once in a while, and by glance I mean gawk.

I look down at my feet and raise both eyebrows. "No shoes?" I finally ask.

She hops off the bed, goes to the closet, and pulls out a pair of boots. "Sorry, almost forgot."

"Are we going somewhere?" I ask looking between the two of them once my shoes are on.

Alice nods. "My gift to you for helping me." I raise an eyebrow. Rosalie's brother ... my boyfriend is going to set you up with an apartment here in the city."

I roll my eyes. This is all moving too fast for me to process. "Then what?" I look between them.

"We prep you. Tell you her likes and dislikes-", Rosalie answers and I quickly interrupt her.

"I'd like to learn those things on my own thank you,"I tell them both. "I'm serious. I do this on my terms. Are we clear?" I say to them forcefully. I want to get to know her for myself. They can't take that part of the romance away from me.

They look at each other for a beat and then back at me. Alice's face mirrors the look of surprise while Rose fans herself looking flushed.

"You just got me so hot." She says and I look away with a huff. She then turns to Alice and grasps her arm looking desperate. "Alice can I please have him."

It's as if I'm not even standing here. It's as if I'm property that she can just take. I roll my eyes at the same time as Alice. Alice makes a zip it motion over her lips, and Rose pouts.

"Fine!" Rose exclaims petulantly as she walks over to fix my jacket.

I fold my arms over my chest and Rose squeezes my biceps.

"Rose! "Alice shouts and Rosalie jumps away from me. "Now, Edward...do you have experience talking to women?"

 _What kind of a question is that?_

With a shrug I reply, "How hard can it be."

"With Bella, there's no telling. She likes to challenge men and push the boundaries a little. She won't go easy on you, " Alice says to me and I shrug.

"I think I can manage."

"I'm sure you can." Rose drawls seductively.

I hear, rather than see Alice's deep, exasperated sigh of frustration. Rose steps back with her arms folded across her chest to gawk at me some more.

"God, you're hot! Where did you find him," Rose says and I become irritated so I snap.

"She found me on the street, under a bridge," I retort causing her eyebrows to rise.

"You're surely the sexiest homeless man I've ever seen. Do you have any friends?"

Alice slaps Rosalie's arm.

"That reminds me. I haven't seen Carlisle all day." I mutter to myself. I look outside to see that it's already dark. "I have to go," I rush out of the door and I hear Alice shout after me.

"Wait. I got you a phone so that I can reach you, Edward!"

Minutes later, I'm down under the bridge where Carlisle and I usually meet before going to the shelter.

He's not there.

I sit on the ground and I wait for him so that we can go together.

I wait and I wait. I don't have a watch so I have no clue what time it is, but I know that it's late. He never leaves me to go to the shelter alone. He wouldn't do that.

Something is wrong.

Something is definitely wrong.

 **Thank you so much Fran Walsh for working your magic on my story! Also thank you gabby for pre-reading! You two are awesome! :)** **Guyyysss I'm on facebook! Join my group [Twilightsavedme]** **Drop a review if you can Thank you ! :** )

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	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers

Chapter 3

EPOV

Alice, Rose and I had very different ideas of how I should 'meet' Bella. I was under the impression that she would recognize me. How could she not? I've seen her a few times per day for months now.

They want me to pretend. Pretend that I just happened upon such a beautiful woman. What they don't realize is that I'm like a lovesick puppy when it comes to Bella, and I'm sure it will be written all over my face. There is no hiding the truth because there is no hiding my feelings for her.

"I won't lie, Alice," I tell her, running a hand through my hair, tugging the ends roughly out of frustration.

I wasn't so sure that I even wanted to. It felt as if doing that made me less real and I wanted to be real with her. I wanted her to fall in love with the real me. Even if that meant telling her the truth.

With an air of finality, I proclaim, "I have to tell her."

"No." Alice shouts and I roll my eyes. "Under no circumstances can you tell her the truth!"

I fold my arms and shrug looking at Rose for help. Rose stood in the corner looking at Alice skeptically.

"You two do understand what's going on here right? We are plotting against a wedding. We are breaking up a couple. Tell her the truth and that's it." She makes a motion across her throat.

"God Alice I just wish that I could talk to her on my own terms. What if I'm honest about who I am?" I ask carefully.

"No, because that will lead back to you being homeless," she says trying to squash the subject.

"But he's not homeless anymore," Rose pipes in actually agreeing with me. I give her a grateful smile.

"Am I the only one thinking clearly here?" She puts her hands against her temples. "You are a friend of Jaspers, okay, and you are visiting, checking out the area and thinking of moving here. That is your backstory."

"It's also not true," I explain and I take a few steps towards Alice. "You said that Bella wants a good and honest man...but you want me to lie to her."

Alice searches my eyes for the longest time and for a minute, I think that I still haven't gotten through to her, but then she sighs deeply, rolling her eyes. "What do you want to tell her? Maybe we can work around telling a lie without telling her the truth."

I chuckle.

"Isn't not telling the truth still a lie?" Rose states my thoughts plainly. She understands, or maybe she's trying to make this difficult so that she can have me to herself...I'm not so sure.

"You two are giving me a fucking headache." She rolls her eyes. "What do you want to say, Edward?"

"Same thing that I told you," I reply, recalling the day she dragged me into the cafe to talk. "I didn't lie to you." She looks confused, and the look quick transforms into utter horror.

Alice shakes her head violently. "When you said you were between places?" Alice asks with a short laugh. "Oh god, Edward, I didn't believe that load of crap. I knew something was up and I told you that Bella likes a challenge. If you're not on your shit, she will call you out."

My head bows as I brainstorm ways to not lie, but also not stretch the truth too much, to where I'm constantly piling on lies to keep another at bay.

"I got it. Go for sympathy. Bella has no defenses against that. She gets all mushy and doe-eyed-" Rose suggests but I cut her off at the knees.

"No! I hate sympathy. I don't want her to pity me for being poor and sympathetic over my misfortune."

Alice slaps her thighs. "So what then Edward? The truth is not an option."

I continue to brainstorm. "I live in an apartment that Jasper set up for me right, and honestly I'm into writing music and singing so I can just say that."

"You're a struggling musician now?" Alice deadpans and I sigh. "What the fuck Edward? You want her to fall for you? Bella likes power, and someone to take control. She won't go for a struggling musician."

"Then she won't go for me," I say sadly as I take a seat on the bed and fall back hard with my hands covering my face.

"Edward." Alice calls but I'm not responsive at the moment. I'm thinking of ways to tell her that this won't work. Thinking of ways to let her down easy. Her plan was great, but obviously, it's not enough.

"Alice, if I had known that I had to lie to get her to like me, I wouldn't have agreed to this."

She comes and rubs my arm.

"There has to be a way." Rose mutters and while I appreciate their support, I honestly don't see how this will work.

"How do you feel about advertising?" Alice asks from beside me and I look up at her in confusion.

"What?" I ask her and she gives me a look that says she has an idea.

"Jasper has an advertising agency among other things and he's looking for an assistant," Alice says and Rose nods. "That way my original story won't be a lie. You work for Jasper and you two are friends and that's how Rose and I know you."

"I would actually have to work for him, you know that right? For it to not be a lie." I tell her and she smiles nodding with excitement.

"Of course," She says and I nod with pursed lips, eyeing her, hoping that we are on the same page. She claps her hands together, bubbling over with excitement. "You're competent enough to do odd jobs. This will be a piece of cake," Alice says to me and I roll my eyes. Alice annoys the living fuck out of me. She's like the little sister I never wanted, and to think I've only known her a week. "Get up" She slaps at my arm.

"Fuck you pixie," I get up slowly glaring at her.

Rose howls out in laughter. "Sure you two aren't related," Rose asks through her laughter.

"Of course not." Alice says, but I'm not so sure. I don't know much about my family. "Now listen. Jasper will probably only ask small things of you like picking up dry cleaning, grabbing coffee, organizing shit, etcetera, etcetera, blah, blah, blah whatever." She grasps my shoulders and looks into my eyes. "You will officially meet Bella on, let's say, Thursday, maybe Friday, that way you've worked almost a full week, mister 'I refuse to fib.' Got it?"

I nod. "So I can't see her today?" I ask and she dramatically rolls her eyes.

"Focus okay. We can't waste any time."

The next few days were spent settling in at my new 'job' and becoming acquainted with Jasper. He's a cool guy, easy to talk to and a very laidback boss.

Mostly he just sat in his office throwing me a football through his open glass door while on the phone with what he calls his paycheck. Occasionally he'll get really busy and he'll show me what he's working on and ask for my input.

Within four short days, he was impressed with how much I had learned and told me that I was going to make him a lot of money. He had no problem 'pretending' to be my friend. He said my easygoing nature makes it easy for him to call me a friend.

Day five without seeing or hearing from Carlisle lets me know that he wasn't coming back. Every night after work, I slept under the bridge hoping he would show up with an explanation, but it never came.

I was worried and sick to my stomach with fear that something bad happened to him.

I woke up the next day, which was Friday to someone slapping me. "Ouch! What in the almighty fuck is wrong with you Alice? God damn it, chill out pixie." She continued to hit me.

"Why the fuck are you sleeping out here in your new clothes? Edward, why is my boyfriend paying for an apartment that you won't sleep in?" She hits me some more before I get up and restrain her.

"I'm waiting for someone," I tell her and she raises an eyebrow.

"Giving up on Bella already?" She asks, shoving me away.

"No. I just-", I breathe out rubbing the back of my head. "I had a really close friend out here and I haven't seen him in a while, and I don't have a way to reach him," I say as I look around just hoping that maybe Carlisle left a clue as to why he disappeared so abruptly.

"I can tell that this is eating you up. Come on" She rubs my arm as we start to walk in the direction of the apartment that I was gifted. "File a missing person report."

"Cops don't care about missing homeless people. I've technically been missing for years and nothing. They won't do a damn thing."

"So what are you going to do? You can't keep sleeping under that bridge hoping that he comes back." She presses for information and I try to brush her off. How many times do I have to say I hate sympathy before people get the clue. I try to ignore the pitiful look on her face and focus on her words with a shrug, thinking that sleeping under the bridge is exactly what I can do.

"Did it for years with no problem," I tell her as we approach the apartment.

"So you tell me," She drawls exasperatedly, but then her expression changes to one of understanding with a smile. "Meet at the cafe in say, thirty minutes. She'll be there."

I nod before turning to walk into the apartment to take a shower and get dressed.

Are you nervous?

I read the text from Rose and instantly become nervous.

I wasn't a minute ago.

I reply to her imagining her laughing at my expense.

Be yourself

Her encouraging words flash across my screen giving me a little push.

I lift my head high and begin to walk to the cafe as I usually do every morning. I stand in my usual spot outside and watch her through the glass as I had done many times before.

Today I would get my chance to talk to her.

I take a deep calming breath, and push off the window with determination. Taking purposeful strides into the cafe, my eyes scan the room trying not to make it obvious that I'm looking for her.

When I see Alice, Rose, and Bella sitting at a table next to the one that Alice and I had once sat at, I make my way over.

I stop right behind Alice's seat, locking eyes with Bella across the way. She looks at me over the rim of her teacup.

Does she not drink coffee? I think as I eye her, trying to figure her out.

As her cup leaves her mouth, she gulps quickly and I see her visibly squirm beneath my gaze.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Rose slap Alice's arm with the back of her hand. She's staring too, but I'm too caught up in Bella's deep brown eyes to look at Rose.

It can't just be me that feels the palpable tension between Bella and me. She has to feel that too. Subconsciously I rub the space above my heart as I do almost every time that I see her. The aching slowly goes away but just like a masochist, I still want to feel that pain. It makes it real. Seeing her in person doesn't feel real.

I clear my throat preparing to speak, but Alice cuts me off. Forcefully I pull my gaze away from Bella to look at Alice and Rose. Alice stands to hug me causing Bella to raise an eyebrow.

"Funny, Alice, this hottie looks nothing like Jasper. " Bella notes how comfortable Alice and I are around each other so I decide to step in to clarify.

Catching her gaze fiercely, I open my mouth to speak. "Jasper and I work together."

I watch as Bella leans back in her seat still staring at me. She folds her arms across her chest and looks me up and down. Then she nods, having either validated what I'd just said or being pleased by what she sees, slowly checking me out. It was probably a little of both.

I flash her a smile and her breath catches and then speeds up. I hear Alice whisper to Rose. "Did you see that?"

With an open mouth of utter aww, Rose watches us, looking between the two of us.

I clear my throat to snap her out of her daze. "Mind if I join you?" The question is only directed at Bella. I point to the seat next to her and she blinks a few times before answering.

"Sure," she says in a breathy tone. I walk around the table to her side and have a seat.

Everyone sits around quietly as the women all stare at me.

I lean back in my seat, laying my arm across the back of Bella's chair as I look around at each of them. I feel Bella's heat radiating from her body through her clothes. I see her breathing become slightly erratic as a beautiful blush graces her face.

She clears her throat and turns in her seat to face me. "Have I seen you before?" She asks me with a slightly shaky voice.

My eyebrows rise, trying not to show the fear of being caught. I shake my head no.

"No, I'm pretty sure you haven't ever seen me before." That's not a lie. Not that I'm keeping track...well actually I am keeping track. She's never really seen me. She's seen rugged, grimy and filthy. She'd barely given that guy a second glance.

"Weird. You kind of look like someone," she faces me with folded arms and a piercing gaze.

I open my mouth to speak, but Alice cuts in. "Maybe you've seen him before. He's really close friends with Jasper."

Bella nods but her eyes stay on me. They narrow slightly as she studies my face.

"So, Edward, "Rose breaks the silence and my head snaps over to look at her. "How are you enjoying your job?"

I smile ready to speak the honest truth. "I love it. I didn't think that I would grasp the concept, but it's going well." I shrug.

"So you're a new employee of Jaspers?" Bella asks and before I can speak Alice talks. I kind of wish that they would go away so that I can get to know Bella.

"He switched positions recently," Alice says quickly and Bella nods.

"I'm glad you're enjoying your job. I have no clue how you manage to put up with Jasper's bullshit." Rose asks and Bella and I laugh. Her laugh is angelic and it fills the room around us. It warms my insides.

I can't help but smile at her as she looks at Rose laughing at Jasper's expense. I rub my chest again. She's under my skin, seizing my heart and she's so unaware. Unaware that she's affected me. Unaware of my love for her.

At that moment, I decide that there's no way I can allow her to marry without a chance. She has to know how I feel. I have seven weeks to shower her with my love and I plan on doing just that.

Staring at Bella, I miss a question directed at me. I blink as she looks at me, taking a drink. She blinks, tilting her head to the side obviously waiting for my answer.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" I ask her and she looks down, her shoulders shaking with laughter. It makes me smile.

"Are you okay?" She turns her body to face me. I furrow my eyebrows wondering how much of the conversation I missed. I was so caught up in her beauty.

Bella leans close, and asks with amusement in her tone, "Why are you staring at me?" Bella asks blinking at me, waiting for my answer.

"You're too beautiful. I can't help but stare at you." She looks down as a blush spreads over her.

I furrow my brows again, hoping I haven't ruined the mood. "I'm sorry. I mean, I'm not sorry, because it's true, but I just-" I clearly can't form coherent sentences around her. I lean forward in my seat, craning my neck to catch her gaze again. I need to see her face to know what she's thinking.

She looks back at me with a smile, then looks away unable to meet what must be an intense look on my part. She nods her head and I frantically try to catch her gaze hoping that I haven't fucked up already.

"That's really sweet of you," She says in a breathy tone still nodding her head.

I grab her hand softly, unable to stop the passion flowing through me at the feeling of being this close. "Come to lunch with me tomorrow." It's not really a question.

She looks over at the two other people at the table for help. I forgot that they were even here.

"It's something I've wanted to ask you for a long time," I say and she furrows her eyebrows. I never want to be apart from her again after today.

"A long time?" She questions. Her eyes glossy, obviously feeling what I feel. How can she not?

"Since I saw you from across the room." Rubbing my chest, I continue. "Feels like a long time."

She pulls her hand away slowly, her eyes never leaving mine. She feels it. I can tell by the look on her face. It must mirror the emotion written all over my face.

"Really, I'm flatter. However, I must tell you that I'm engaged to be married in a few weeks. "She tells me and a sharp pain radiates through my chest. I swallow a lump in my throat feeling physically ill. I was aware that she was getting married, but somehow hearing her say it broke my heart into a million pieces. "We are very much in love."

I fall back in my seat with my arm still on the back of her chair. "Can't blame a guy for trying," I say with pursed lips, trying not to convey how hurt I am on the inside.

She nods with a smile. I lean back towards her speaking lowly. "Love is an amazing thing. I just learned that recently actually." I nod my head sadly. "It just-it makes you open up more...to things, people, ideas. You would do anything for it." My eyes fall to her parted lips, and I note her labored breathing. It's physical evidence that my words are affecting her. I am affecting her. My eyes quickly flick back, stealing her gaze. "Everyone doesn't get to be with the love of their life. You're very fortunate to be marrying yours." I see her face frown up at me and I think it's best to leave before I say something overly creepy like blurting out my undying love for a stranger.

I stand slowly and look down at Bella wishing that I could touch her. Wishing I could run my hand down her cheek and feel the softness on my fingertips.

"I have to get going." I say sadly and I catch a glimpse of Bella's face dropping, along with her shoulders. Taking a step away from her, I'm still watching her face. All of a sudden, her head snaps up and her eyes widen.

"Are you coming to dinner at my home tomorrow night?" Bella asks quickly, surprising herself. Did she not mean to ask that? She clears her throat. "Did Jasper invite you?"

I look down at Alice and Rose, who are pretending not to be paying us any attention. I shake my head no and she smiles. "Please come." She says to me and I smile brightly searching her face. She smiles back at me, her big brown eyes sparkling.

God, she's beautiful.

"I'll see you two later," I say to Alice and Rose and their heads rise quickly.

Alice nods. "I'm going to help you look for your friend," She says and I nod happy that she's offering her help.

"Me too," Rose says and I smile at them thankful for all that they have done. I wave at them, before turning to Bella. I reach for her hand bringing it to my lips. I kiss the soft skin there and let my lips linger as I look down at her face.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Bella," I tell her as I slowly release her hand.

"Pleasure meeting you too," She replies softly, breathing heavily from our contact.

With one last smile around the table, I stand and exit the cafe pretty proud of myself. I had accomplished something that had been months in the making.

Alice gave me a chance at happiness.

A chance at love.

I told myself that even if she rejects me after seven weeks of her time I would still be grateful for the time that I was able to spend with her.

I would be heartbroken if she was to reject me, but at least I was given a fair chance. I'm clean cut and well-dressed now, which is something I hadn't been just two short weeks ago. Bella wouldn't have given that me a chance.

Someone that rough around the edges, marrying a woman like Bella?

Not a chance.

 **Thank you Fran Walsh for another amazingly editted chapter !**

 **Thank you all for reading my little story and for all of your kind reviews!**

 **Please join my facebook group Twilightsavedme**


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers

Chapter 4

After work on Friday, at the time we usually went to the shelter together, I paced back and forth under the bridge hoping that Carlisle showed.

Alice and Rose had agreed to help me search for him, but they had no clue how to go about looking for a homeless man. I was getting a little irritated listening to Alice's plan's for project 'ruin Bella's wedding', so around eight, I sent them on their way promising to meet the next morning for coffee.

"Sure you're okay out here," Alice asked me showing just how worried she was.

"Yeah Edward, It's cold." Rose insisted trying to pull me to my feet, but I don't want to move. I'm devastated. Something had happened to my friend and I had no idea what. Carlisle had been a father figure to me and now he's gone.

Just like that.

I run my hands down my face and huff. "I can't just leave. If he comes back and I'm not here-" I get choked up thinking about the possibility. Years together and not once had we had an incident like this. We had an understanding. We always waited for each other.

"Edward." She rubbed my arm sympathetically, which was obviously something I was going to have to get used to. She sighs heavily. "He may never come-"

"Don't say that! He's coming back." I snap angrily and watch as she exchanges a look of worry with Rose. "You two don't get it. He's all that I have. I've been alone for years and he's the only person-" It's like losing my family all over again. I'm alone under the bridge wondering if I'm even going to be missed.

"You're not alone Edward. You have us, and soon you'll have the love of your life." Alice gives me an encouraging smile that I'm unable to return.

Rose comes and pats my cheek. "We'll look again tomorrow, " She says in a friendly tone.

They start to turn to walk away when I shout. "Thank you,"They both smile at me. "Thank you both for everything,"I tell them sincerely.

"No problem at all," Rose says at the same time that Alice says, "We're friends. That's what friends are for."

I smile hoping that even if all goes south with Bella, I would still have Alice, Rose, and Jasper's friendship.

The next morning comes quickly. I search frantically for Carlisle at shelters, under bridges and then I wait by the cafe wondering if he'll show up there looking for me, knowing that I would be looking for her.

At nine, Bella comes out of the cafe looking just as beautiful as ever. Every time that I see her is like a new breath of fresh air.

I'd noticed her, Alice and Rose having coffee inside, but I was too worried about Carlisle. He had to show up at some point.

I offer Bella a kind smile that she returns with hooded eyes. She then leans against the door next to me.

"Coming in?" She asks as she toys with her necklace.

I point at the cafe with my thumb. "I'll be right in."

She continues to stand there looking at me, but she doesn't speak. She looks as if she wants to say something but doesn't know how to approach the topic in mind.

I look over at her trying to get rid of the nervousness that I feel from being near her. I get an idea as I stare into her beautiful eyes. I want time with her by myself, to get to know her. I inhale a deep breath and take a dangerous step closer to her.

Her chest visibly rises as I invade her space. Her aroma fills my nose, and I breathe her in closing my eyes to savor her. "Walk with me?" I look down into her eyes trying to dispel any of her hesitation.

 _I won't hurt you._ I try to convey with my eyes. She stares up at me and bites her lower lip. I grip the wall above her head hovering over her trying hard not to reach out, grab her and pull her body to mine.

It takes every bit of self-control that I have not to touch her. I want nothing more than to feel her body flush against mine as I mold my lips to hers in a kiss that told her every word that I wasn't yet allowed to say.

I hoped that she could see it in my eyes. I hoped that she could feel my love surrounding her, engulfing her. I hoped my love for her overwhelmed her as much as it overwhelmed me.

Sometimes when I think of her, I suffocate at the possibility of never having my love reciprocated. I close my eyes clenching my teeth at the thought.

When I reopen my eyes, I see her head slowly nod and I smile, thankful to Alice for moments like this. Moments that I never would have had without her encouragement.

I stand taller, straighter, with my head held high. I've never been happier than I was at that very moment. I hold my arm out for her to loop with mine and she looks at it with furrowed eyebrows, confusion written all over her face.

When the realization hits her, she throws her head back with melodic laughter that makes my whole body buzz. Bella's whole face lights up and her shoulders shake with glee. My smile brightens from the joyous feeling I get from seeing her happy, from being the one that put that smile on her face.

When she stops laughing, she turns mock serious trying to stifle herself. "No way you're single," she puts her hand on her hip.

Now it's my turn to laugh. I want to say that the only woman I want is right in front of me, but I hold it back and push my arm out further for her to take. She slides hers around mine and we begin to walk.

We walk silently for a moment and it gives me time to revel in the feel of her body so close to mine.

"How did you meet Jasper,"She asks and I wince at the question not having an answer for her. I try to push the conversation away from me quickly hoping no personal questions about my life come up ever again, but I know that's unlikely.

One day I'll be able to tell her the truth, the whole truth and we may be able to overlook the way in which we met. Hopefully, she'll be deeply in love with me. So deep, in fact, that my faults won't matter to her. It's a long shot, but right now, it's my only option.

"Why don't you tell me how you met your lovely best friends," I ask her and she glances over at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Well Rose, Jasper and I met in college and Alice is my fiance's cousin so we've all been close for a long time," She says and then pauses as a thought hits her. "Funny how none of them ever mentioned you."

"I'm a very new friend of Jasper's. We only really ever had a working relationship." I say and she nods in understanding.

"Jasper is a very reserved guy. I guess you met Alice and she made it hard for your relationship with Jasper to remain professional." She assumes and I must say I like her assumption so I smile. I didn't even have to make anything up. "Alice tries to be everyone's friend."

"She's a great friend," I say softly thinking back on how gracious she's been to me. Happy that I have someone like Alice in my corner, and proud to call her friend.

"Why are you single?" She asks out of the blue, catching me completely off guard. "I just mean...you know, what's wrong with you?" She side eyes me with a smile playing on her lips.

I can't help but smile back with the thought that the most beautiful woman in the world is on my arm asking me why I'm single.

I give her a side eye and a raised eyebrow. "What makes you think that I'm single," I ask her just to see where her head is.

"You're too close to my two best friends," She says with a sigh. "No woman would allow a man as good looking as you to be that close to other women. Especially a woman that she is not close to herself. I know that I wouldn't tolerate it."

I walk quietly nodding my head at her observation. I mentally fist pump. This beautiful woman thinks me to be handsome. The same rugged man from the streets, unclean, poor and homeless.

Then I smile, glad that she believes that I'm really close to her friends. It's crazy how close we seem to have gotten in just two weeks.

"Plus Rose sort of told me. But I already knew. You carry yourself like a man that is very available." She says and I purse my lips. "You should get out there and see what the world has to offer. Get some female company. I have a few friends that I can hook you up with." She says and my heart drops. It's so easy to forget that she doesn't know how I feel about her.

I look over at her, sliding a mask to cover the hurt that I feel from her words. "I'm in great company right now." I tell her and she smiles brightly. "I'm not interested in others."

She faces forward again and I watch her face contort and change quite a bit. I wish at that moment that I could read her mind. I would give anything to get a glimpse inside of that head of hers.

I want to know what she thinks of me. I want to know if she recognizes me as the homeless man that constantly watched over her from a distance.

Loved her from a distance.

I have to know if she feels the buzz between us. She has to feel the tension. She has to feel the tugging, the pull, and the need to be around me. It can't be one-sided. It just can't be.

Another look passes over her face, and the silence begins to eat at me. Irritated and confused, unable to bear the thoughts swamping my brain, I have to hear her speak. She has to bring me out of my thoughts.

"Tell me what you're thinking." I all but demand, and she looks over at me quickly just as her breathing hitches. "I'm sorry," I say quickly trying to check myself; forgetting that she barely knows me. "I'm just trying to read you."

She looks away with a shrug. "I'm an open book."

"Yes,"I say simply and stop walking all together to look at her full on. Her eyebrows furrow as she stares at me surprised by our sudden halt. "But I'm trying to read between the lines."

"Are you suggesting that I have something to hide?" She says almost offended and this time I can't help myself. My free hand reaches up and I run the back of my hand down her face. She doesn't move away which is a good sign. Her face and body visibly calm under my touch. The last thing that I want to do is offend her.

"I'm suggesting that there is more to you than what meets the eye. I want to know the side of you that you hide from everyone else." I read her and her facial expression changes and I can tell that she's deep in thought.

I lean forward slightly as her scent wafts over me, intoxicating me.

She must feel it too because her lips part as she stares at me, and I stare at her lips. I want to claim them. I want to feel the warmth of her lips against mine.

My tongue darts out to lick my bottom lip and I watch as her chest rises and falls heavily and her eyes slide closed. The heat of her body intensifies and I can't help but think that she wants this as much as I do. She wants me. She wants to kiss me.

I'm reeling from the thought and I can't help but smile down at her beautiful face. I grab her by the nape of her neck holding firmly hoping that this is something that she wants. Praying that she doesn't regret it and never wants to see me again.

Just as my lips are approaching hers, a car horn brings us out of our bubble. Her eyes snap open and her eyes search my face before the realization of what almost happened hits her. She pulls away from me completely, trying her best to look everywhere but in my direction.

She clears her throat and busies her hands by fixing her clothes on her body. I silently curse at myself, having missed yet another chance.

"We should get back. They are probably wondering where I am." I nod in understanding even though I know that they know exactly where she is.

When we approach the door to the café, she begins to fidget and I can tell that she's slightly uncomfortable, but deep in thought. I reach up to smooth out the crease in her brow and her eyes snap to mine.

She huffs and looks away quickly. I begin to frown when I notice a change in her posture and I note her facial change. She's guarding herself now. There's a wall up that wasn't there before. I feel it as she avoids eye contact with me. She visibly changes into a different person and I hate it. I furrow my brows, craning my neck to try to catch her gaze. This angers her and it's noticeable. She takes a step back from me.

"Hey." I call in a soothing tone, but it does nothing. I'm confused as fuck. What just happened?

"I don't think you should come to dinner tonight," she says with a straight face and it's like a blow to the gut. "I'd appreciate if you didn't show up."

"Wh-," I start to ask why when she turns abruptly, disappearing into the cafe. I shove a hand through my hair as I watch her retreating form. I pull at my hair in frustration, completely confused by the events that lead to her saying that I was uninvited to dinner.

I watch her through the glass as she takes her seat by Rose. Alice looks out the window and shoots me a sympathetic look, which only makes me angrier.

Bella must have felt something. She had to...and she's running away from it.

Running away from me.

 **Thank you again Fran for your excellent beta skills once again. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Chapter 5

"Tell me what happened," Alice pushes through the front doors of my apartment, tossing her jacket and keys on the counter before marching towards me. I can feel her eyes on me, but I can't see her because I have my arm draped over my eyes, as I lay sprawled out on the couch.

"Is Rose with you?" I quietly ask her feeling drained from the day that I've had.

"No, she's out on a date," Alice tells me as she comes over and sits in the love seat next to my head. "Why"

"I won't have the energy to retell this story to her later. I'm still trying to wrap my head around what happened."

"She told me that she uninvited you to dinner," Alice says and it brings back the look on Bella's face when she'd told me not to come tonight. "What happened out there?"

"We were just talking and then something... changed. " I furrow my eyebrows recalling how I felt just spending time alone with Bella. I felt at ease, all of the earlier nervousness was gone.

"What? What changed," Alice propped her head on her arm listening attentively. I had no clue how to answer that question.

"We almost kissed," I say quickly thinking back on the look on her face as I brought mine close, preparing for the blissful feeling of having her lips on mine. I was so close to her lips, just a breath away.

"Wait? I don't understand. Start from the beginning." Alice blinks.

I rub the back of my neck with a shrug. "Alice, that's the bottom line."

She shakes her head with wrinkled eyebrows. "Why would she-, "Then something dawns on her. A look of realization washes over her face. "She's scared."

"Of what? Of me?" I had a feeling that Bella only told me not to come because she felt something, but I wasn't sure.

"Scared of what she feels for you," Alice says in awe with her head tilted.

"That's not a good thing. That means she's just going to keep running," I shove a hand through my hair in frustration. "Why would she entertain feelings for me when she's engaged?" I ask Alice.

I don't know what to do about this. How can I get to know her if she's too scared to even be around me?

Alice stands up quickly with a smack of the couch. "You're going tonight."

I immediately shake my head no and lay back on the couch. "Not gonna happen Alice."

"Come on. Please, Edward you have to." She pulls at my arms and I relent sitting up slowly.

"She's going to kick me out." I don't think she'd go that far, but I really don't want to upset her. Alice looks away in thought. "What then?" I question. No way will she see me again if I show up uninvited.

"She won't kick you out, Edward. She wouldn't make a scene like that," Alice assures me and I relent, taking a deep calming breath. I nod.

Taking another breath, I completely give in to Alice mostly because I can't give up a chance to see Bella again. I also want to ask her why she ran from me today. I needed a real answer so that I can stop beating myself up about it.

"Okay. I'll go, " I say quickly as I stand and rush towards the bedroom before I lose my nerve. Then a thought comes to mind. "Rose isn't coming to dinner?"

Alice shoots me a confused look from across the room.

"You said that she was on a date," I remind Alice of what she'd said earlier.

Alice nods and looks down at her watch. "Oh, yea she should be leaving her date now." I nod in understanding as I start back towards my room. I hear Alice's keys so I know that she's about to leave. "Be back in an hour to pick you up."

Almost two hours later, I'm standing in a huge, open dining room surrounded by well-dressed men and women.

I stand around admiring all of the decorations, the sculptures, the paintings, thinking that this shit must cost a fortune. I must say, Bella's fiancé has a nice home. It doesn't make me hate him any less, though. I still despise him with everything in me.

I feel a familiar ache in my chest and anger causes my body to overheat. I'm jealous that this man can give the love of my life everything that I'm not able to. I probably would never have as much to offer her. Only love. That's all I have to give.

I suddenly feel eyes on me so I slowly scan the room coming in contact with an attractive woman with long blonde hair flowing near her waist. She is very tall and model-like thin.

Our eyes lock momentarily and she gives me a come-hither look. I all but smirk at her attempt, turning back around to face the paintings on the wall.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and I spin around quickly, ready to tell the blonde that I'm not interested when I come face to face with Bella. My eyes widen in surprise. I knew that I would see her, but I thought she would spend most of the night ignoring me.

She glances in the surrounding area probably trying to make sure that there was no one within earshot.

"Why are you here? I asked you not to come",

I fold my arms across my chest and let my eyes roam down her body. She's in a very sexy black cocktail dress that frames her body perfectly. The sight of her causes my cock to twitch. I've never seen her dressed like this.

"Alice invited me,"I square my shoulders.

"She can't invite you to someone else's event. That is not how it works." She snaps at me angrily.

"Bella," I reach for her hand simply because I can't help myself. There's so much love flowing through me I just can't stop myself from touching her.

With a plea from deep in my soul, I try to convey to her how sorry I am for upsetting her. I can't bear the thought of her being mad at me.

She snatches her arm away and I wince. She's angry so I can understand her not wanting to be touched, but it doesn't make this hurt any less.

I try to compose myself pretending that I'm not at all hurt by her words or actions.

"I don't want you here, "She says with her lips, but her eyes tell me a different story.

"You don't mean that," I take a defensive stance in front of her with an arched eyebrow.

I can read her now. I can read the expressions as they cross her face. There's no way that she can possibly hide a thing from me now.

"You don't get to say that to me, Edward. You don't know me. You don't know anything about me, " She snaps.

"That doesn't matter," I say dismissively. It doesn't matter because I loved her from the moment that I laid eyes on her. I'm trying to get to know her and that's what matters.

"It does. It truly does. You came virtually out of nowhere, spitting out bullshit, claiming to know me..." She trails off. "You have no idea."

"Then tell me,"I push. "I want to know you."

Her face contorts and I can tell that she's seething, as she practically shakes with anger.

"You can't! God, how many times do I have to tell you that I'm engaged? This-", She motions around the room. "-is my engagement dinner. This is an intimate gathering to celebrate my engagement. You don't belong here, Edward. And you don't need to know anything about me outside of the fact that I am not available."

I pause, staring into her eyes, collecting her words, piecing together what I deem to be the real meaning behind them.

She has a right to be frustrated. I knew that she was engaged, yet I was actively pursuing her.

"Just leave," She tells me quickly with a frustrated swipe of her hand. "Alice had no right."

I can't let her put all of the blame on Alice. Alice is just trying to help.

"I begged her to bring me,"I breathe out and she sighs heavily showing just how frustrated she is by placing one hand on her hip. She looks down, thinking, looking for answers. She looks back up swiftly with a look of utter defeat on her face.

"Why? Why would you do that?" She asks me the question she had been thinking, trying to come up with an explanation and coming up blank.

"To see you and to-,"I start but I'm interrupted when she puts up a hand. up.

"You need to leave," She says forcefully not wanting to hear what I have to say.

"Not until you explain why you uninvited me in the first place," I question just as forcefully.

"Who do you think you are?" She stares up and into my eyes and I can see that she's irritated beyond belief.

So many thoughts are running through her mind. She can't decide on which emotion to cling to. I decide to show her that I am not a threat and that I am not trying to challenge her whatsoever.

I just want to grab her, shake her and tell her how I feel...but I can't.

"Bella,"I breathe. Catching her gaze, I try to convey to her how I feel. She sees it written on my face, she has to see it. "Just answer the question, and I'll leave."

She visibly thaws before my eyes. The crease in her brow leaves her face and is replaced by anguish. It breaks my heart to see that look.

Just tell me exactly what you're thinking love. I silently beg.

"I didn't change my mind. I accepted your offer to walk specifically so that I could tell you not to come tonight." She admits and I suddenly recall her leaning against the glass window of the cafe struggling to tell me something. Even then, even before the almost kiss; she was going to tell me not to come.

I lean forward, suddenly hurt by the truth. I don't understand. "Why?"

Her face contorts again. She leans forward to whisper through grit teeth. "You know damn well why you shouldn't be here," She says harshly, and with eyes so full of emotion.

Realization washes over me and she must see it because she leans back away from me and again puts up her mask. up.

 _You can't hide from me now love, not when I know the truth_. Today she ran away because she realized that she was attracted to me.

She had felt the attraction from the moment that we met and tried to ignore it. She had invited me on a whim, obviously regretting her decision once she realized that there was something between us. She didn't know what, but there was definitely something.

Even with the realization, I have to hear her say it. "Tell me,"I breathe out, desperate for her answer when I feel someone join us before I even see him. A tall, slender, blonde-haired man wraps an arm around Bella's waist, extending the other one out towards me to shake.

"You must be Edward." He greets me with a smile, but there's something off about it. I stand straighter, taller, squaring my shoulders. I immediately know who he is.

I look down at his hand choosing not to take it. I lift my jaw staring him right in the eyes. I hated men like him. Men that thought it okay to hit on women because they are physically weaker.

He huffs with pursed lips, drawing his hand back into his personal space and then wiping it on his neatly pressed dressed shirt.

"Not a friendly guy, this one huh, " He asks Bella with a slight laugh. "I'm Demetri by the way."

I nod my head catching his name but not caring one bit. "My cousin has not stopped talking about you," Demetri says with a fake smile.

I can tell that my rejecting his handshake is going to cause issues. He is definitely going to keep a watchful eye on me, which is fine since I would be doing the same.

He tips his head when he notices that I am not going to respond to a word that he speaks to me. He tugs at Bella's waist harshly and my nostrils flare as my fists instinctively ball up at my sides.

"If you will excuse us, my uncle would like to meet my beautiful fiancé. Nice meeting you Edward." He pulls her away but not before she takes one more lingering look at me that silently said _'leave_.' I ignore her look, offering her a slight nod of my head, still pissed at how her fiancé just pulled her away from me.

Seconds later, her presence is replaced by another. "Tanya Denali,"The blonde woman from earlier, extends her hand. "You're Alice's friend right?"

I nod at her, placing both of my hands in my pockets. I now regret telling Alice and Jasper that I would be okay on my own while they mingled. She runs her long, manicured finger along my arm as she looks up at me underneath her lashes. "She didn't mention that you were so yummy."

I raise an eyebrow at her.

Had Alice told everyone that she knew about my existence? Even if she did, there's not much for her to tell anyway, so what exactly did anyone hear about me?

"She's been keeping you to herself I see," Tanya says and I look away unimpressed by her attempt at seducing me.

"It was nice meeting you Tanya, but I have to go,"I tell her quickly, pulling my arm out of her grasp. "Excuse me,"I tell her politely, remembering to use good manners.

I have to talk to Bella.

I walk away from Tanya, making my way around the house looking for Bella. When I don't see her anywhere in the dining room, I decide to be brave and start looking in other rooms in the massive house.

After checking what looked to be an office, and three different bedrooms, walking further into the house I hear crying coming from one of the rooms.

"Bella," I call before pushing the door open. I see Bella sitting on the edge of a massive, king-size bed settled in the middle of the room.

When she realizes that she's no longer alone in the room, she wipes frantically at her tears quickly trying to pull herself together.

"Please go," She says quickly turning away from me.

I take a slow, careful step towards her. "Bella, wh-."

"-Edward," She snaps, cutting me off. "Why are you still here? Please, just..." Something in the tone of her voice tells me not to push my luck so I back out of the door.

Anger consumes me as I think of the possible reasons for Bella's tears. I was sure that it was something that Demetri did to her. That son of a bitch!

I take off back down the hall prepared to confront him for hurting her. My body shaking as anger surges through me at the thought of him putting his hands on Bella, and spewing abusive words at her.

I rub fiercely at my eyes thinking at this moment that if I were not to calm down I would surely kill the bastard.

I round the corner and I see Demetri in my line of vision so I bound towards him only to be detoured by Alice.

"Having fun," She asks, but one look at my face gives her an answer. Her face falls and her smile is replaced by sympathy, spurring on my anger. I'm not the one that needs the pity right now.

"What's wrong?" she asks trying to look in my eyes. I can't meet her gaze because I'm too busy looking over her head at her cousin, ready to rip his body in two for hurting Bella.

She turns and follows my line of vision. When she sees me looking at Demetri, she puts two and two together. "Oh no, you don't; no, no, no Edward. Listen to me. You have got to calm down",

She pushes at my chest, but my weight is too much for her. My eyes stay trained on Demetri laughing and enjoying himself while Bella sits in a room crying. her eyes out.

I move around Alice and continue walking towards Demetri ready to confront him. He sees me coming and mid-laugh, he motions for me to come closer.

"Have you met Edward?" Demetri asks as I approach them.

I pull my angry gaze away from Demetri long enough to quickly glance at the man he motions towards.

I have to do a double take at the man standing before me, watching, as he seems to do the same thing.

 _It can't be him._

 _How?_

 _Why?_

 _I need an explanation_.

"Edward?"

Thank you so much Fran for editting my little story :)

Fic Rec

Knock Me Up Please- Gabby1017

Going Down-Redtini

Ready For You-Lostinfanfiction

Stripped- Robzbeanie

I Do Maybe- Twilightladies


	6. Chapter 6

I don't own Twilight, these characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

This story has been beta'd by the wonderful Fran Walsh.

Chapter 6

Demetri looks between the two of us as we silent stand opposite each other, scrutinizing our appearances.

"You know my uncle?" Demetri asks, raising an eyebrow skeptically. I open my mouth to reply when I mentally backtrack and slowly process his words.

I freeze.

Carlisle slightly nods his head; he's as speechless as I am at the sight of his clean-shaven friend.

Quickly I try to mask my suspicious look as I gaze from Demetri to Carlisle. I play it cool and stick a hand in my pocket. I furrow my eyebrows and with the slight nod of my head,

I open my mouth to speak. "Good to see you again Carlisle." I hold a hand out to Carlisle and watch as he stares down at my hand in confusion but still takes it to shake. If it was that easy for him to recognize me, how come Bella hadn't? Apparently, she hadn't ever noticed me.

Pain wracks through me and I begin to feel ill just from the thought. Bella would never accept the fact that I have no job, no home, no ambition. Even if she fell as deeply in love with me as I am with her, she would never accept the real me.

Suddenly I feel the urge to empty my stomach, feeling miserably ill at the thought of being rejected.

I tip my head to Carlisle needing to get a breath of fresh air. "Excuse me,"I say shortly, making a hasty exit out of the front door.

I walk to the end of the street, feeling better as I inhale and exhale the fresh air.

Seconds later I hear the front door of the house open.

"Let's go." I hear Alice call out to me in an irritated tone.

Twenty minutes later, I'm walking into my apartment feeling tired, and for once feeling appreciative of the fact that I have a bed to sleep in.

I can't even make it to the bed at the moment so I fall out onto the couch thinking about her. She's all I seem to think about.

I wonder if she thinks about me.

I sigh heavily and close my eyes to picture her in my head. I try not to focus on the looks that she gave me tonight, and focus on her smiling face from the other day. I had been able to make her laugh and I knew right then that I loved her unconditionally without a shadow of a doubt. Her smile made this all worth it.

But right now, she's running. She doesn't want to entertain her attraction for me. She probably didn't even want to see me anymore. She had broken my heart with four simple words.

 _"You don't belong here."_

I wanted to tell her that she was wrong and that I belong wherever she is, but I knew that I couldn't. There're so many restrictions on my love, so little that I can say or do to let her know just how much I love her. So much that I can't tell her.

I hear the doorknob twisting and I instantly feel guilty. Alice and I had an extremely tense car ride back here so I assumed when she pulled up that she wasn't coming inside. So I rushed out of her car and into the apartment, closing the door on her.

The door opens and I know what's coming so I stop her in her tracks.

"I don't want to talk about it, Alice," I shout out from my living room.

I hear the front door close, and the clinking of her heels against the tile floor letting me know that she's approaching the living room from the entryway.

"What the hell Edward?" She snaps, and I look up in time to see her raising her arms up dramatically, before dropping them roughly at her sides in disbelief.

I close my eyes, drop my head back to the couch, and rub my hands down my face in frustration. "I had to get out of there." I groan out.

"Don't tell me you're the reason Bella was crying?" She breathes out and I can hear the judgment in her voice. "Did you hurt her?"

My eyes snap to hers, upset and hurt by the accusation.

"If you think for one second that I would ever hurt Bella-" I all but growl. The person that she should be pissed at is her cousin.

"I don't know Edward, would you?" She shouts at me. "I don't know what you would do."

Jumping off the couch, I'm resigned from the situation. This is never going to work because there's no way Bella is going to want me. She has everything she could ever need already. Why would she throw it all away for an attraction?

Walking towards Alice with slow, careful strides, I let out a harsh and bitter laugh before meeting Alice's disappointed gaze.

"You're absolutely right Alice. You don't know what I would do because we're not friends. Never were." As soon as the words leave my lips, I instantly regret them. Alice has been a great friend to me, she didn't deserve that.

Feeling guilty, I look away not wanting to see the look on her face.

Ready to put this day as well as this part of my life behind me, I walk passed Alice and out the front door.

Even though I'm pissed that Alice would even suggest that I would hurt Bella, I try to see her side of it. She really doesn't know me.

A part of me understands and a part of me can't help but feel hurt by the fact that she was ready to condemn me without hearing my side of the story.

I haven't had many friends over the years, but even I know that's not the way to resolve an issue with one.

I try to keep that in mind when I spot Carlisle pacing back and forth beside the back door of the bakery where we were fortunate to receive a lot of our meals over the years.

"Carlisle," I call out, trying not to fly off the handle with assumptions and accusations as Alice had done only minutes ago.

He stops pacing and walks over to me. When he reaches me, he stares, clearly speechless at the change in my appearance.

"I went to see my brothers." Carlisle begins, offering a half smile. "My brother..." He clears his throat, looking down at the ground, probably to gather his thoughts. "His son is getting married. I couldn't miss his engagement dinner regardless of my issues with my family."

"I understand." I tell him, and it's true. He had a good reason for up and leaving as he did.

"I was going to come back when I got everything settled. I was going to come and get you, son." He says and I furrow my eyebrows. "I haven't been completely honest with you about my past life, or my family, Edward -."

"Your family has money, I get it." I finish for him. That's not something he can apologize for.

"I have money. I have an overwhelming amount of money and I can't stand it." He drops his head. "I worked so hard, so hard Edward, all for my wife. We were supposed to enjoy that money together. The money I worked for, as well as the inheritance money my brothers and I were to split." He takes a shaky breath. "When Ann died I-," His voice broke.

"You couldn't enjoy it. I get it, Carlisle."

"I didn't want it." He exhales. "My two living brothers have wives and kids to share their wealth with, their life with, but I had no one," He says with deep-rooted sadness. "But you showed me, Edward, you showed me that I wasn't alone. You're as much my family as any of the people that you met tonight. You are my son." Carlisle said before hugging me. I was thankful for Carlisle. Thankful to have such an excellent role model in my life.

Carlisle wanted me to see his home, and to see if I could see myself living there. When we arrived, he tells me to make myself at home, which I did with ease.

Walking through the house, I came across an office. I stepped in and observed the well-kept room as if Carlisle hadn't been absent for years. He must have people to dust up and clean, but how had he continued to pay them? I'd have to ask.

I looked on his desk, observing a picture of him and his late wife. She was a beautiful woman with dark brown hair, brown eyes, and a kind smile. They made a great couple together and I can tell from the picture that they were deeply in love.

Minutes later, I step out of the office in search for Carlisle. I find him walking down the hall towards me with clothes in his hand.

"You can sleep in this." He hands me black pajamas and leads me back down the hallway to a room near his office.

The room was spacious and had an instant, soothing effect on me.

The bedroom had richly stained wood floors and white walls with a built-in shelf above the king sized floating bed. And across from the bed was a glowing fireplace.

I continue into the room noting that there was a small hall that led to a walk-in closet, across from a full sized bathroom.

I nod my head in appreciation. This room was considerably larger than the master bedroom at the apartment that Jasper gave me.

"There should be towels in there," Carlisle says from the door.

"Thanks, Carlisle."

Carlisle backs out of the room with pursed lips and furrowed brows, looking as if he wants to ask something. Then he speaks.

"Alice is quite taken with you," He says, and then smiles. "I have never heard her speak so highly of someone." He smiles proudly.

"She talked about me?"I ask.

He shrugs. "She mentioned that she'd made a great friend in Seattle. Never imagined it would be you." His smiling face turns confused. He scratches his brow. "She also told me to pretend that I knew you because she told Bella that you two have been friends for awhile."

My eyes widen. Of course, Alice would say that. She doesn't know that I already know Carlisle. I sigh heavily. This lying thing is already causing problems. I never lie. I have no reason to. I have nothing to lose. Had nothing to lose...until Bella. I almost laugh to myself. She's not even mine to lose.

"Edward." Carlisle snaps me out of my thoughts. "Do you know anything about that?"

Releasing a huge breath, I stretch and rub my eyes roughly with the palm of my hands. "Yeeaah!" I drag out the word, prolonging the inevitable explanation. "Can I tell you about it in the morning?"

"Okay." He nods repeatedly, as if he is trying to understand. He backs further out of the room. "Get some rest," He says with his usual half smile. "We'll talk more tomorrow, I have more questions."

I nod with pursed lips before turning around to check out the rest of the room. I follow the hall to the bathroom, deciding to take a shower and change into the clothes that Carlisle gave me.

After my shower, I was so eager to end this day that I didn't even fold the covers back, opting to sleep on top of them. The last thing that I think about before falling into unconsciousness is Bella.

The next morning I wake up and frantically search for a clock knowing that I slept longer than I usually do.

It was almost ten in the morning according to the clock on the dresser, and I knew that I officially slept in; I was officially late for work.

I wonder if Jasper is going to fire me now that my deal with Alice is off? I suspect it's a given since I'm an hour late.

I quickly got out of bed thinking that I should maybe call Jasper to see where I stand. I mean, he's still technically my employer.

"Edward." Carlisle calls, bringing my attention to the bedroom door. "Clothes." He puts them on top of the dresser. "Meet me in the dining room," He says before turning to exit the room.

I shower quickly, opting not to shave. For today, I'm going to be myself. I'm okay with a little facial hair.

I throw on the clothes and then go off in search of my friend.

When I see the huge spread of breakfast food on the table in front of Carlisle, I rub my hands together ready to dig in.

"They missed me," Carlisle says as he stares down at the spread.

"Who? Your staff." I question as I slide into a chair and begin to fill my plate.

"My cook likes to prepare every breakfast food imaginable."

"You kept them?" I ask Carlisle and he nods in reply. "But no one has lived here for years."

"Yes, but I couldn't just fire them. It's not their fault their boss fell off the deep end. They still have families to feed." Carlisle explained.

"You continued paying them." It wasn't really a question, more so stating facts.

"No, my nephew, Demetri, kept this place up in hopes that I would return."

I nod in understanding as I dig into the pancakes on my plate.

"I invited him over for breakfast, I hope you don't mind." Carlisle asks and I drop my fork with a clink.

If he comes, I'm sure he's bringing Bella and I can't be here when that happens.

"Carlisle, Bella is the woman from the cafe," I tell him quickly. His eyes widen in shock. He has to realize that this is too many coincidences. I nod my head and pick up a napkin to wipe my face before standing.

"You're sure?" He squints his eyes in disbelief. "I was wondering why you would have been at my nephew's engagement party."

"Yes, it's the same woman, Alice introduced me to Bella at the café and we have since talked. She actually invited me to the party. We're..." I search for the right word, and realise that I can actually tell the truth. "We're friends." And sadly nothing more.

"I'm sorry Edward." Carlisle apologizes but doesn't give me a sympathetic look. Somehow I can't figure out if it's because he knows that I hate sympathy or because Bella is his nephew's fiancé.

Now that I think about it, Carlisle had never seen 'the girl from the cafe' so he had no way of knowing that they were the same person.

"I hadn't officially met her until yesterday myself, so I had no way of knowing, but I am sorry."

"Not your fault that I fell in love with a stranger who happens to be engaged to your nephew." I back away from the table. "Hey, Carlisle, can you not tell anyone that we met on the street? I mean obviously we have to tell people that we met through Alice, but still...can you not tell Alice the truth. We're pretending to know each other as you said."

Carlisle waves at me dismissively as if that was never his intention. "Matter a fact just don't say anything about me."

Carlisle nods repeatedly but doesn't lift his eyes from his plate. "Thanks," I say as I back farther out of the kitchen and make my way toward the hall and almost back into Demetri.

"Eva is the best," Demetri says with a big smile on his face as he stares at the food. Then he glances at me and squares his shoulders. "Edward." He holds out his hand once again, and this time, out of respect for Carlisle, I shake it with a firm grip to show him I'm not to be fucked with. "Carlisle mentioned he was taking you in. He's a good man, always befriending the strays." He says condescendingly as he pulls his hand away and wipes it on his shirt.

I don't reply, and he scoffs looking over at Carlisle but points at me. "You have to put up with this now?" Demetri jokes, and reaches around to pat my back which is way too friendly seeing that I haven't uttered one word to him since we met.

"Edward is overwhelmed with meeting so many new people, and you're being rude to my guest," Carlisle speaks, wiping his mouth.

"Whatever," Demetri says. "Where's Eva? I need to speak with her."

"In the kitchen." Carlisle nods his head to the right, and continues to eat, and read the newspaper. Demetri makes his way to the kitchen.

"I'm assuming you told him that I would be here?" I ask Carlisle, and he nods.

"I'm being hospitable to you because you're Alice's friend." He gives me a look to make sure that I understand his words. "Alice mentioned you were in between places, so asking you to stay here in this big house seemed simple." Carlisle says, and I smile to myself thinking about how much I'll miss Alice.

"Thank you, Carlisle. I would stick around but...honestly I hate your nephew."

Carlisle nods. "Understandable, but I still need an explanation later as to why I have to go around lying for you and Alice.

Without another word, I step completely out of the dining room and back down the hall.

As I leave, I see Bella turn the corner walking towards me and my heart skips a beat. The world slows as I watch her, too busy on her phone and unaware of my presences.

I take the time to look her up and down. She has on a strapless, black and white plaid dress, paired with red, peep-toe sandals, and she looks exquisite with her hair tied into a messy bun atop her head.

She looks up slowly with a frown already set on her face having felt my eyes on her.

When she sees me, she looks away and I swear I hear her curse under breath. She tries to ignore me, to walk passed, but I step in front of her.

She scuffs and snaps her head up quickly meeting my gaze.

"Why are you everywhere that I go? Why?" She asks rudely, folding her arms across her chest. I almost shout out that I want her, but then I remember that I gave up on that dream.

I put my hands behind me back to stop myself from reaching out and touching her.

"Carlisle has graciously offered me a place to live." I look back at the house and see that she does the same before frowning.

"What are you...homeless?" She asks as if the thought is absurd, and I momentarily freeze as she rolls her eyes.

"No, I am..." I trail off and clear my throat trying to think of what to say to her. "I was living with a friend, and things didn't work out." Half-truth. I'm still keeping score.

She shifts her feet impatiently, and I almost lose my nerve to say what I need to say.

"I want to-" I trail off, nervously shoving a hand through my hair. "I need to apologize to you."

She looks surprised by my confession.

"I should not have tried to kiss you yesterday. I-" I pause. "-I can see that it made you uncomfortable and for that I am sorry."

Her arms slowly fall to her sides as she stares at me. "I don't know what to say," She says slowly.

"Say that you forgive me, and we can be friends."

She looks away again, thinking, and I watch as her tongue darts out to wet her bottom lip. She looks back catching my gaze.

"Fine. Friends," she holds her hand out to me and I smile down at it before shaking it.

"Friends."

Thank you so much Fran for editting my story you're wonderful.:)


	7. Chapter 7

I am sorry for the late update. For some reason I thought I had already posted this chapter, and then noticed that I had only posted the teaser so here you go ladies! :)

I do not own twilight. These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Rough Around the Edges

Chapter 7

When I told Bella that I wasn't staying for breakfast, leaving out the reason behind my departure, she shoved me playfully telling me that there's no way that she could allow me to miss out on Eva's breakfast.

She grabs my hand, dragging me down the hall and back into the dining room. It felt so good to be this close to her and have her hand in mine. It was only a small interaction, but it meant a lot to me.

"Look who tried to skip out on breakfast," Bella announces as we enter the kitchen. She leaves me at the entrance, releasing my hand, and bounces over to Demetri, kissing his cheek before taking a seat next to him. I grab a seat next to Carlisle and begin to eat from the same plate that I'd originally filled up with food.

"When are you going back to work?" Demetri asks Carlisle and I try to ignore their conversation because it has little or nothing to do with me.

Bella and I eat in silence, exchanging looks ever so often. Glancing over, I see that Carlisle and Demetri are having a very tense conversation.

"Hey, are you not speaking to Alice because of me?" Bella whispers and I furrow my eyebrows. "She's torn up about the fight. She was worried about you, wondering where you were."

I clear my throat, shifting nervously in my seat. "What else did she tell you?" I inquire with a low voice, careful not to interrupt the conversation that Carlisle and Demetri were in the middle of having.

"That's pretty much it. She said that she knows she messed up."

"She did, that's true." I look down effectively ending our conversation. I didn't want to talk to her about my relationship with Alice or anyone else for that matter. I only wanted to talk about my burning desire for her, but this was hardly the place.

Even with my agreement to try to be friends with her, in the back of my mind I knew that I wouldn't be able to hold back my love in my words or actions. Some day she would know how I feel and she would probably run because I'm not what she wants.

"Babe, I made you a cup of coffee." Demetri drapes his arm on the back of Bella's chair pushing the cup towards her.

Bella stares down at the cup and opens her mouth to speak when I interject.

"Bella doesn't drink coffee," I speak for her, remembering that she preferred tea over coffee.

All eyes fall on me, I can feel them, but mine stay trained on Bella's beautiful face. She stares at me with her mouth open in surprise.

A look of frustration or disbelief passes across Demetri's face, and he looks at Bella in frustration. "Drink." He demands loudly and she visibly winces at his tone. A sneer sets on my face as I look over at Demetri.

"I don't drink coffee, sweetie." Bella whispers, staring down at the cup.

"You go to Leah's goddamn coffee shop almost three times a day and you don't drink coffee." He spits out and then scuffs, looking over at Carlisle in disbelief.

"Tea," I say through gritted teeth. "She drinks tea; preferably green." I feel Bella's eyes on me, but this time, I don't look at her. I stare at her fiancé with a glare on my face, pissed at the way that he had spoken to her.

He feels my eyes and looks at me, raising an eyebrow "And just how do you know so much about my Bella?"

My nostrils flare from the mention of her being his. I have to clench my jaw tightly to stop myself from correcting him because there's nothing to correct. He was absolutely right, she is his...for now.

I choose not to answer but I continue to glare.

"Whatever." He pushes from the table and walks away as Bella quickly scrambles from the table after him.

After a beat of silence, Carlisle speaks. "That was interesting," He says with sarcasm, bringing me slightly out of my mood.

I sigh heavily with a stretch. "I've never had a dull breakfast morning with you before old man. I wasn't going to start today."

He laughs and picks up a napkin to wipe his mouth before digging in his pocket.

"I forgot to give you this." He hands me a card and I look down at it. "In case you need anything."

"Carlisle, as much as I appreciate this, I've gone years without money just fine. Plus you worked hard for this, I didn't." I try to hand it back, but he holds up a hand.

"I'll be offended if you don't take it."

I stare down at the offensive plastic, hating it. "I don't want money to change me."

"It won't, son. I promise."

After a full week of ignoring Alice and Rose and their endless phone calls and texts, I finally give in and decide to go to the cafe, knowing that they would probably be there.

I really just wanted to see Bella, but then again that's all the time. I wake up with Bella on my mind every morning, with a longing to see her.

I walk inside, eager to see her, knowing that she would be here. I scout her out of the sea of people inside, some standing in the long, wraparound line in the walkway, some walking around to look for a table.

I look near the window, knowing Bella would have a seat as close to the window as possible. I noted on previous visits that she liked to stare out the window and people watch, which is something that I often did too. That's how I'd first saw her face. I was standing outside smoking a cigarette that I'd gotten from a stranger when I just happened to look back through the glass window and into the cafe.

I'd never paid much attention to the place before then because I had no business in there. I didn't have a penny to my name, and businesses are usually against guys like me sitting around in their establishments without a purchase.

I was fortunate to happen upon a beautiful face that stirred up emotions that I had carefully locked away for years. Bella opened me up to the possibility of love, something I never imagined I'd experience. I didn't fully even understand what love was. I had never experienced it; yet, I knew with just one look at her that I loved her. There was no other way to describe the emotion. It was pure unadulterated love.

I remember her sitting alone, reading a book, and I remember silently begging her to look up so that I could better see her.

And she did.

As if she felt my eyes, they snapped to mine and our gaze locked for a moment before she looked away. When she looked back up, there was a remarkable smile on her face.

She noticed me staring and instead of waving me away or calling me a creep as some may have done, she waved her fingers at me with an amused expression on her face.

I smiled back, feeling my heartbeat speed up from being noticed. Sadly, she hadn't ever had that reaction to me after that, but it made a difference that first day because she had given me hope.

It never really bothered me that she didn't seem to notice me until I saw her reaction after Alice had cleaned me up and dressed. Rugged and rough never got those looks...not that I blame her. It just put some things into perspective for me.

I scan the room, and as I figured, she was near the window looking out, people watching as the other women talked around her. I notice her sitting at a table with Alice, Rose and the blonde woman that I recognized from the other night.

I slowly approach them, noting that all four women had their eyes on me.

"Edward." Alice jumps up and gives me a hug, surprising me. I smile in spite of myself because I had to admit that I kind of missed her. "I'm sorry that I hurt you," She whispers while still in a hug. Then she pulls away and looks up at me. "I should've-"

"-Alice, It's okay." I cut her off with a chuckle. I'm over what happened last weekend.

"We're okay?" She asks, searching my eyes as I nod my head, answering her question. "Good!" Her face turns angry and she punches me in the arm.

"What the fuck, Alice?"

"How come you haven't been to work. "Alice folds her arms across her chest waiting for my answer. "Jasper's pissed."

I glance at the table to make sure they can't hear me, leaning forward I tell her that I took a personal day.

"A day Edward? No, you took several days. And without letting him know."

Shoving a hand through my hair, I look around for the right words to say, but I come up blank. "I'm going to call him today."

She narrows her eyes at me. "I am. I promise. Now, can I join you?" I ask, pointing to the table.

Her face quickly changes and she puts on a smile and shrugs. "Sure." She turns around and takes her seat next to Rose.

"You're people watching again." I tease Bella as I round her laughing at her expense. When I grab a chair and pull it next to her, she elbows me playfully.

"Fuck you. I wasn't people watching."

"People watching?" Rose and Tanya both ask, looking between Bella and me in confusion.

Bella rolls her eyes exasperatedly. "It's nothing guys, really."

I stare at Bella with scrutiny, narrowing my eyes to figure her out. I ignore their question. "Why don't you ever watch people inside the cafe?"

Bella licks her bottom lip and looks at me with a blank expression. She leans forward to whisper as if it's a secret. "People don't particularly like being stared at." She sits back in her chair grinning at me, and I do the same, folding my arms across my chest.

I nod. "But out the window is okay?" I ask her smiling as I wait for her answer.

"I do it." She shrugs, and then her brows crease in question, as she scrutinizes my face. "Why do you care?"

I lift one shoulder in a slight shrug. "I do it too." I reply and she watches my face, carefully waiting for an emotion to flicker across. I stare at her with a smile as she continues to examine me.

"You do not." she says in disbelief, then rolls her eyes, before looking around the table.

"How do you people watch?" I hear Tanya ask, but I don't acknowledge her.

"I've got you figured out." I tell Bella, tilting my head to the side, her eyes never leaving mine.

"Oh?" She questions with genuine interest. "Try me." She challenges. I raise an eyebrow in silent response.

Challenge accepted.

"I'm one hundred percent sure that you're a writer." I tell her and she almost gives me a look of surprise, but she masks it, knowing that I'm paying attention to her face.

"So what? Alice told you." Her eyes quickly flick to Alice, then back to me.

"But I didn't Bella," Alice says quietly looking on with wide eyes.

Bella shoots me a look of annoyance. She's used to scrutinizing people; I learned that when we first met, I decided to turn the tables on her. From the looks that she's giving me, she doesn't like it much.

"You didn't know that she was a writer?" Tanya asks me, but again I ignore her, still staring at Bella.

"Can we talk about something else?" She says in frustration. That's another thing that I learned about her. She doesn't like when all of the attention is on her. She would rather fade into the back, which I think is absurd. She's a very gorgeous woman, and her modesty makes her even more attractive.

"You remember Tanya." Bella asks and I nod, smiling at Tanya from across the table, dazzling her. She smiles back, happy that I was finally giving her the attention that she's been trying to get from me ever since I sat down.

"I definitely remember him. I can't forget a face like that," Tanya purred and out of the corner of my eye, I catch a look cross Bella's face. The look left her face just as quickly as it came, but I caught it. She quickly masked the uneasy look and it made me think about how often she might have concealed her true feelings that same way. Hiding her true feelings, why did she feel the need?

I turn back to her, ignoring the look of annoyance on Tanya's face. I lean forward, licking my bottom lip.

"How are you?" I ask in a low voice, craning my neck to catch her gaze. I give her my full attention, letting her know without saying that she's the only woman that I'm interested in.

She presses her lips together, having not expected me to speak to her again. She nods before answering. "I'm great, how are you?" She's being polite.

"Much better now," I say huskily, hoping she caught the meaning behind my words. She stares at me with parted lips for a beat, and I momentarily forget that others are around us. Then again, every time we're around each other I feel as though we're in a bubble. It's true, in those moments no one matters but Bella.

"We've got to go guys." Alice and Rose stand and push in their chairs. "Edward, "Alice calls, momentarily pulling my attention away from Bella.

"Yea," I quickly turn my head to face her.

"Call Jasper." She gives me a stern look letting me know that she means business. I salute her and quickly turn my attention back to Bella.

"I should go too. It was great seeing you again Edward." Tanya says before getting up to leave.

"You too," I reply politely with a smile on my face, glad that everyone is giving Bella and me a moment alone.

She starts to walk away but changes her mind, mid turn. "We should get together sometime," she's pulling out all the stops now, making sure I notice that she's interested in me.

My eyes widen. "I, uh, yeah, okay." I rub the back of my neck nervously.

"Bella has my number." She shoots Bella a meaningful look, then smiles at me before turning to walk away.

I turn my full attention back to Bella and see her looking everywhere but at me while drinking from her teacup.

She stares out the window for a while, deep in thought, and I watch her face as it registers confusion, and then disappointment.

"Are you okay?" I lightly touch her hand with my index finger, and she visibly shivers. Then she surprises me by snatching her hand away quickly.

"I'm fine," she says in a clipped tone before turning her head once again.

"What was that about the other day?" I ask and she looks over at me with an annoyed look. "Does he always talk to you like that?"

"Who?" She asks me, a look of confusion etched on her face.

"Demetri," I answer shortly.

"Like what?" she puts her tea down, preparing to put up her protective barrier.

"Like you're a child. More specifically, like you are his child." She rolls her eyes and scuffs, dropping her gaze back to her tea. "I don't like it," I say through clenched teeth, flaring my nostrils as I try to control my anger.

"I don't have to listen to this," she mutters to herself. She slowly stands, and I instantly regret bringing this up instead of trying to have a decent conversation with her.

"Bella..."I gently pull her elbow as I stand. I'm not ready to be away from her, not yet. It pains me to be away from her.

"What?" she snaps, pulling her arm out of my grasp.

I sigh heavily trying to figure out how to approach her with what's going on in my mind. "I know that you're afraid of me." I begin. "But this running thing you keep doing is getting old sweetheart. We're not done talking." I tell her as I sit back in my chair and motion to hers.

"Excuse me." she all but shouts at me.

Staring up, I take a deep calming breath, trying to show her that I'm not a threat and letting her know that it's okay to let her guard down with me.

She stares at me with scrutiny, folding her arms across her chest. I see something in her eyes, there's just the right amount of interest to make her stay.

She enjoys talking to me as much as I enjoy talking to her. She doesn't want to leave; it's just that my topic of choice made her uncomfortable.

She takes her seat but keeps her arms folded defensively.

I lean forward to speak to her in a low voice. "I'm trying to learn more about you."

"Then ask about me, not my fiancé." She snaps at me and her feistiness makes me smile. I lick my bottom lip and nod my head understanding her frustration.

"Okay," I say before looking up heavenward while I think of the first thing that I want to know about her. "What's your favorite color?"

"You can't be serious." She scoffs loudly and looks away shaking her head not believing what I'd just asked.

I sit up, straighter, taller. "Stop giving me a hard time."

She looks down sighing heavily. "Why do you care so much?" she asks before slowly glancing up at me when I don't reply. I can't think of anything to say. All of the answers that I can think of will probably have her running again.

We remain silent, staring at each other across the table, silently challenging each other. "It's blue, right." I break the silence.

"What?" She breathes heavily, leading me to believe that I'm affecting her.

"Your favorite color is blue. It's a close running with red, though, seeing as you wear red a lot, but blue is definitely your favorite color. "I tell her since she refuses to answer me. Sitting back in my seat with a satisfied grin plastered on my face, I stretch my arms out and stare at her.

She shakes her head looking away almost impressed. "How observant of you," she purses her lips with narrowed eyes and I nod. Then I lean forward and clasp my hands together in front of me.

"I want to take you somewhere," I tell her as I stand, not waiting for her to object.

"I'm not going anywhere with you." she laughs at my audacity.

"It wasn't a question." I stare down at her intently.

She scuffs and licks her lips, and then she looks up at me, taking her bottom lip between her teeth as she studying my face.

She's intrigued.

She stands and rolls her eyes. "Where are we going?"

"Pike's Place Market"

Almost ten minutes later, we walk down Pike street and the sign with the words Public Market Center comes into view. Bella said that she's been to Pike's Place Market before, but I was determined to make her have a better experience with me.

She grabs my arm and squeezes in excitement when she sees a street performer with multiple hula-hoops around his waist.

I love the way her face lights up with excitement as she soaks in all of the amazing things surrounding her and I could tell just from the way her eyes lit up that the small things count with Bella.

We walk around for hours just watching the street performers, smiling at everything like little kids at an amusement park, and talking about any and everything.

The smell of fresh fruit fills our noses when a slice of peach is thrust in our faces to sample. "For you," He says enthusiastically, before moving around us to pass samples to others.

"Mmm." Bella moans with her eyes closed, and the sight of her causes me to drop my fruit. "This is so good." She opens her eyes with a smile and sees that my piece fell to the ground. She looks at me sadly. "Here. "She holds out her uneaten half of peach and my heart soars.

Her selflessness is one of the things that I love about her. She didn't have to share with me if she didn't want to and our relationship is pretty shaky at the moment, but she was still nice to me. Something she hadn't been since the first day we met. She's always been polite, but this is different. She's different. She's giving me a chance to get to know her.

Instead of grabbing it from her hands, I open my mouth, letting her put the fruit in. She watches me chew with an unreadable expression on her face as she bites her lower lip.

"You're right. It's good." I tell her and her face breaks into a smile as she nods in agreement. "Come on."

I take her indoors and I we walk around seeing people with the same joyous expression that I'm sure is shown on ours. We walk by the craft stalls and I show her around to the different vendors.

Later I pull Bella to Starbucks and we take a seat outdoors to begin people watching together. I scan around until I see someone interesting. "Look." I point.

"What's he doing?" Bella laughs and I join in. There stands a man in his late forties dressed in cargo pants and a plaid shirt, jumping in the air, shaking his head from side to side, stiff as a board with his hands to his sides.

People walk around him laughing at his expense. "Dancing? Oh my god," she laughs behind her hand and it's a beautiful sight.

She's beautiful.

"He's clearly enjoying his day." I tell her and she throws her head back in laughter.

After a beat, we calm down and silently people watch. "Do you ever write anything on paper?"

She shakes her head no. "There's no point." She looks down toying with the button on her blouse. She's sad about something ...but what?

I lift her chin to look at me. "I have to see your face."

When I remove my hand from her chin, she tilts her head to the side studying my face.

"How do you know so much about me?" Her voice is a sweet whisper that fades in the wind.

"I'm observant and perceptive and eager to learn everything about you," I reply, hoping it's the answer that she wanted to hear.

"Why?" She asks, confusion written all over her face.

"Why am I observant?" I tease her, knowing what she's really asking. She rolls her eyes causing me to laugh. She shoves me playfully.

"I feel like I'm at a disadvantage," she says, abandoning her earlier question. "I know nothing about you. I can't figure you out."

"That's a good thing," I tell her.

"No. I feel like you should offer up some information about yourself since I'm an open book to you."

I think carefully, but she speaks again. "Something personal, something about your family,"she pushes.

"I don't have any family," I tell her sadly, hoping she changes the subject. Talking about my family that topic will ruin my mood.

"Come on. That's not fair," she folds her arms across her chest. "You can't blow off my question that way."

"I just did."

"Asshole," She says shaking her head with a very amused look on her face.

"What about your family?" I question her and she wags her finger at me disapprovingly.

"Oh no. You don't get to ask me another question until you answer one of mine. I know absolutely nothing about your life."

"But you know me," I state a fact because I believe that she does. She has read me just as I'd done her. We are good at figuring people out.

I just wish that she was able to see what Alice and I see in Demetri. Somehow she's blind when it comes to him. I want to ask about that, but I won't dare ruin our time together.

"Tell me something. "She pouts. "Tell me something or I'm leaving."

"You won't." I tell her and she raises an eyebrow. "You enjoy our banter too much."

She stands quickly and looks down at me; a playful gleam in her eyes tells me that this is a game. "Tell me something." She takes a step back away from the table.

I ignore her, looking around, refusing to give in. "Fine. Goodbye, Edward."

She walks away, going towards the saxophone player. I get an idea at that moment, and I act on it.

She looks back at me with a smile playing on her lips. When she sees me stand, she speeds up her walk to a playful run. Every time she looks back I get closer, and when she realizes that I'm about to catch her she squeals.

I grab her around the waist, lifting her into the air causing her to squeal louder and then break out into a laughing fit. It does my heart good seeing her so happy and carefree.

I wanted to be able to keep that smile on her beautiful face forever.

I set her back on her feet lightly and turn her slowly to face me. I hear the sound of music, and realize that we had run right in front of the bay where he was playing.

Looking down into her eyes, I slowly wrap an arm around her waist pulling her body close to mine as we sway to the music, our eyes locked.

"I didn't know that you could dance," she questions and I nod smiling.

"I learned as a kid. It's something that stuck with me."

"You're so full of surprises." she looks up at me with a smile as she wraps her arms around my neck.

"You have no idea," I say dangerously and full of implications.

We silently sway to the music, our connection growing stronger as I stare lovingly into her eyes.

"You give me a rush, Edward," she says out of the blue. "I'm not usually like this. I don't have a carefree bone in my body. I plan everything, and I expect things to go as planned." She says and I nod in encouragement for her to continue. "You threatened those plans from the day that I met you and I-" She looks away trying to find the words. "I'm having a hard time figuring out what that means for me," she clears her throat.

"You have a lot to think about."

"You're right. I do." She looks down frustrated. I remove a hand from her waist to lift her chin.

"Right now don't think, just feel." I tell her and watch as her eyes slowly slide closed as she listens to my words. I pull her closer to whisper in her ear. "Do what feels right. Feel the music, and the wind softly caressing your body."

"Yes." She whispers and keeps her lips parted and it takes everything inside of me not to lean down and claim her sexy lips.

"Your heart is racing." I know because I can feel it against my chest. Her breathing becomes heavy. I stare down at her, the urge to kiss her becomes almost impossible to ignore.

I lean closer to her, just a breathe away. "Bella." I say and she opens her eyes, meeting my gaze, her chest heaving. God, I want her so badly. "I don't have the strength to pull away from you again."

"Don't." she whispers so quietly that I almost feel I imagined her saying it.

Her hands trail down my neck, and down my arms, wrapping around my waist. I grab her by her neck, holding her head in place with one hand, the other slowly trails down her soft cheek and her breath hitches.

Cupping her face, I run my thumb across her bottom lip and she lets out a moan. I can't help myself, I lean closer, inching slowly, her breath washes over my face and I can almost taste her.

"Kiss me." She breathes, and I smile because this is what I wanted. I wanted her to want me to kiss her. I wanted her to want me as much as I wanted her.

When the longing becomes unbearable, my lips meet hers with a gentle kiss that quickly becomes more urgent. She grips my waist, trying to pull me closer to her.

My hands slither down her neck, and slowly down her spine. She moans into the kiss and I take advantage of that moment by thrusting my tongue into her mouth as I pull her body impossibly closer, as my arms envelop her in a tight embrace.

All too soon, she slowly pulls away from the kiss, and I lean my forehead against hers to catch my breath. Her eyes close and her breath washes across my face.

Her warm fingers begin to trail up my arms, the tips of each one memorizing the feel of my skin.

The smell of her permeates the air, causing my mouth to water. Her warm brown eyes opened slowly, blinking at me, enamoring me, as if they were on fire. She wanted me; that I was sure of. But she fights it everytime we are together and I hate it. I hate that she's engaged, and won't consider giving us a chance. I want her to myself, and swore to make it a realty. She would be mine.

Thank you ladies so much for reading. :)

Thank you so much all of your hard work on this chapter Fran! You're the best! :)


	8. Chapter 8

**_Hello everyone I am back with another chapter. I hope you all are enjoying my little story. I swear Fran is making it ten times better this time around so everyone should thank her! Thank you so much Fran for your excellent beta skills you go above and beyond! :)_**

 _Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers_ _ **.**_

Chapter 8

* * *

 **Bella's POV**

"Hey babe, " I breathe softly into the phone, glancing over to see if Edward heard me and of course he did. It's obvious seeing as he was just smiling at me seconds before I answered Demetri's phone call and now he's frowning and deliberately looking everywhere but at me as we walk. "What's up?"

"Nothing. Where are you?" There's an edge to his voice that lets me know that he's in one of his moods.

"Um, I'm just taking a walk," I answer glancing over at Edward again and, this time, his eyes are glued on me.

"Taking a walk," He deadpans and I can tell that he's peeved.

"Yeah, I needed some fresh air," I quickly reply knowing that's the best way to deal with his attitude.

Quick and direct.

"You have a car, Bella. An expensive car that I bought for you." He points out the obvious and I cringe because he makes it seem as though I asked for that car.

"So what," I roll my eyes as Edward and I continue to walk.

"You need to use it," He slightly raises his voice and I come to the conclusion that I should just agree so that we can move on with the reason for his call.

"Okay, I will," I say quickly needing to move on. "Did you need something?" He was beginning to irritate me and I just wanted this phone call to end.

"Yea actually I need you to go home and get dressed. I have a last minute dinner to attend."

I fold my arms across my chest trying to figure out why I'm needed at a dinner. "And I have to go," I ask open-endedly.

"Bella," He huffs in frustration. "I'll be home in thirty minutes. Be dressed."

* * *

 **Edward's POV**

When I got back to Carlisle's after dropping Bella off at home I found him in his office next to the room that he'd deemed my own. I knocked softly, peeking through the cracked door.

"Come in son," He says without looking up from his work.

"What are you up to tonight?" I ask walking further into the room. He looks up then and smiles, clasping his hands together in front of him on his desk.

"I think Eva's cooking dinner as we speak."

I hop into the seat in front of him casually and he seems to look pleased with how comfortable I've made myself in his office.

"How do you do it, Carlisle?" I ask the question that is at the forefront of my mind every time I think about how much money he seems to have. I fold my arms across my chest shaking my head waiting for an answer. He furrows his eyebrows confused by my incomplete question.

"How do I do what exactly" He sits back in his chair, and studied me with open interest.

"This," I slowly eye different articles in his office as I speak while motioning around with my hands. "Adjust."

He nods in understanding and makes an 'ahh' sound.

"I'm having a hard time with everything," I tell him.

"That's because you're thinking too much. Have you used the card that I gave you even once," He asks with his head tilted in concern.

"Of course not Carlisle. What would I need to buy." He provides pretty much everything for me.

He sighs. "Clothes, Edward, I'm sure you need clothes."

He's not aware that Alice has already taken care of that for me, but I nod anyway just to appease him. He purses his lips slightly and I can tell that something is on his mind.

"I need to ask you something son," He says and I nod, encouraging him to continue. "How would you feel about me mentoring you?"

"Mentor me? "I ask in surprise. "For what?" Curiosity getting the better of me.

"I want to take you under my wing and teach you everything there is to know about the investment business," He explains.

"How can I do that? Don't I need a college degree or something?" I ask him confused, but actually considering it. I hadn't thought much about my future but I know that if I plan to have Bella in my life, I will have to have a better job than Jasper's assistant. Then a thought occurs to me. I may not even have that job anymore. I hadn't even talked to him about my absences.

"You leave that up to me," He says and I nod. "It's going to be hard work, and long hours but I'm sure, that with a couple of years experience, you will do great."

I ponder the idea and I honestly can't find any excuse not to give it a try. It's an excellent opportunity for a guy like me.

"I don't want to pressure you. I know your music is important to you."

"It was important to me growing up, but now?" I speak out loud but really to myself trying to push myself just to agree.

"And you are welcome to stay here as long as you'd like. I'd be lonely here otherwise," He says and I nod with a smile that he quickly returns before looking back down at his desk.

"How many bedrooms are there in this house?" I ask him, having only really been on one side of the house.

"Uh, there are six," He says and I mentally count the number of doors that I've seen, and I'm sure that there are definitely more than six rooms. He must see the calculating look on my face because he continues. "There's also this room, a game room, theater, and a library."

"Carlisle you must be fucking loaded," I laugh and watch as he shrugs nonchalantly as he always does when money is the subject.

"It was my parents' home. I grew up here and I stayed behind to help with the family business while my brothers went off to their respective career choices." He explained and I nod slowly before looking around his office curious if he'd left this room exactly how it'd been when it belonged to his father. To me it doesn't reflect the man that I have grown to know over the years.

Carlisle looks at me expectantly as if waiting for me to say something. "What?"

He sighs but opens his mouth to speak. "Son," He says cautiously. "Bella is ...," He trails off looking dead into my eyes. "She's my nephew's fiancée." He starts and I can see that he is at war with his feelings on the matter. "You should know that Demetri is very..." He trails off again looking heavenward, then back at me. "He's very possessive, and he has openly expressed to me that he dislikes you."

 _More like he dislikes my interest in his fiancé._

I chuckle lightly averting my eyes from him with the scratch of my jaw in an attempt to hide my irritation. I slowly stand and with a low voice, I open my mouth to speak.

"The feeling is mutual."

I turn to leave but he stops me with the shout of my name. I stop and turn back to face him. "There are things involving my family," He clears his throat, his face growing more and more strained as he speaks. "Things that I am not at liberty to discuss. You should be aware that I left not only my money, but my family for reasons that may become clear to you if you continue to pursue Bella."

Somehow what he said seemed like a threat but not from him. He's warning me seemingly out of experience.

"I think that I can handle your nephew, Carlisle." I try to make light of the situation with a grin that he doesn't return.

He sighs heavily looking down, pinching his nose and rubbing his eyes before looking back up. I want to assure him that I know what I'm doing but I also don't want him worrying about me so I do something that I promised myself that I would never do.

I lie.

"I'm not pursuing her. We parted as friends here at breakfast last week."

A simple half-truth.

He nods but doesn't look at all convinced. He knows firsthand just how deep my feelings are for Bella. My world shifted upright at the first sight of her. I didn't know her, didn't even know her name but I felt so much at that moment when her eyes met mine. I knew, I just knew that I had to have her and that nothing would stop me from one day making her mine.

Bella was my singular reason to wake up in the morning. She gave me motivation, and an actual reason to want to live a life that seriously lacked purpose. She was my everything, and I still haven't completely come to terms with the fact that she is further out of reach than I ever thought. I'm so close, yet so far from the only thing that I have ever strived for in life and it fucking hurts. Her heart belongs to someone else, someone that can give her everything that I can't, and I wasn't sure, if I even stood a chance against him.

"So she knows how you feel?" Carlisle asks after a beat of silence. I shake my head no and he gives me a sympathetic look, but quickly wipes the expression clear from his face. "You can talk to me about anything Edward, you know that." It was a question didn't need to be answered. He knew that I could and would talk to him about anything.

I slightly nod my head seeing that he still seemed to want an answer. He grins and then stands, his fingertips linger on the desk. "Now, let's go see what Eva has prepared for us."

* * *

 **Bella's Pov**

I can't focus on anything, not the conversation flowing around me, the music softly playing in the background, or the arm resting behind my seat. I barely even registered Demetri's hot breath at my ear as he spoke to me through grit teeth.

"You're awfully quiet." He points out but I still can't think straight. My mind is on Edward. We'd walked all the way to Demetri's home and he left me with a kiss that left me wanting more. There was a silent promise in the kiss and it held far more urgency then the one from earlier in the day. He wanted more, that was obvious, and I was left more confused than ever.

I shrug with a smile, my eyes still trained on the centerpiece in the middle of the table. I couldn't even focus my eyes on it as my mind swirled with thoughts.

"You should eat." He nods his head to the food and when I don't respond he clutches my thigh roughly under the table and my eyes snap to his to see him basically sneering at me.

I look up at him bewildered and put off by his actions. Was I always expected to enjoy myself at his business dinners? I'm just supposed to pretend I'm having a good time? What if I wasn't up to it, which I wasn't, was I still expected to keep up appearances for his sake? The look on his face gave me my answer.

He leans closer to my ear, still clutching my thigh. "Eat,"He demands and when he pulls away from me there was a smile on his face as he looked over at his friends, pretending he'd just whispered something endearing.

I was used to this behavior, but not when I was so obviously in a tizzy. If he cared for me even in the slightest, wouldn't he have asked if I was okay?

Shaking my head to clear it, I gently grab my fork and look up smiling at his friends. They return my smile instantly and I feel Demetri release my thigh, but he pulls my chair closer to his. Then he kisses the side of my face and whispers in my ear. "Good girl."

The next day I decide to skip my daily routine at the cafe, needing to keep a bit of distance between Edward and me after what happened yesterday. I haven't forgotten how it felt just to be with him, and honestly, even though it hasn't been a full twenty-four hours, I already miss him.

I touch my lips softly, remembering the feel of his lips against mine. So soft, so smooth. He was so careful with me, so expressive, as if each kiss was conveying something that he wasn't able to say.

Biting my lower lip, I let my eyes slide close, remembering the feel of his tongue, his taste, his scent. Oh god! He has me going crazy thinking about him, dreaming about him, and fantasizing.

All of a sudden, I hear a door slam shut and I turn quickly feeling startled. I grab my chest and close my eyes as the fear leaves my body with a deep sigh.

"Thought you'd be half way to Leah's by now," He tosses his newspaper down on the bed and walks towards the closet to grab a shirt.

"Not today," I answer him shortly, feeling a little sick to my stomach at the sight of him. "I'm going to check out flowers," I try to force a smile.

As I watch him dress, I begin to get a rush of thoughts again and before I can stop myself, I blurt out. "What's my favorite color?"

He spins around to face me as he puts on his dress shirt. His brow is raised in confusion and he doesn't make a move or speak a word, he just looks at me with curiosity written all over his face.

"What's my favorite color Meech," I ask again a little less forceful and more playful as if it were a game.

His face changes to a look of disgust. "Don't call me that! I despise that name," He goes back to buttoning his shirt.

"Are you going to answer me," I fold my arms across my chest and watch as a small grin spreads across his face as he walks over to me. Resting his hands on my shoulders, he leans down kissing my forehead roughly, causing my eyes to shut.

"Your favorite color is blue," He answers sure of himself and I smile thinking that it must either really be obvious or he really does know me. How could he not? "What brought this on?"

He walks away going back to his task, not looking at me.

"Just something someone said to me yesterday." I wave it off thinking that someone like Demetri would remember little details like my favorite color so I'm not so sure that's the best question to ask. I may very well have told him at one point in time and forgot. However, Edward had known without me ever telling him. "It's stupid."

He nods, continuing to button his shirt. "Help me with this," He points to his neck where the very top button is. I walk over and grab his button quickly fastening it.

His stare pins me where I stand and I become unnerved. "What do you know of Edward," He walks away to the dresser mirror, fixing his clothes.

I spread my arms out before letting them fall to my sides in a shrug. "Nothing really."

"But you have coffee with him every morning?"

"I have tea with Alice every morning," I correct him and he raises an eyebrow as if he knows something contrary to what I've said. "Sometimes he's there, and Rose, sometimes Tanya."

"I'm not stupid Bella. He's there. I know that he is, just about every morning."

"Are you having me followed?" I ask loudly after much thought. His words clearly lead me to believe that is exactly what's happening and I need to make sure that that isn't the case.

His face quickly grows angry at my tone. "You are in no position to ask questions, Isabella. But if you must know, I have Alice followed daily."

I shake my head in deep thought trying to find a possible reason as to why that is needed. "Why?"

He lets out a deep, exasperated sigh. "That is none of your business," He shakes his head.

"Alice isn't a bad person. This makes no sense. Alice is not your enemy. She's your cousin. " I can't believe that he thinks Alice would do anything to hurt him. She's the sweetest person that I've ever met.

He rolls his eyes and looks over at me with an impatient look. "This conversation is not up for discussion."

"She's my best friend. Tell me why you're having her followed." I grab for his arm as he turns his back on me, unwilling to talk further. He quickly swoops his arm away and inadvertently smacks me with the back of his hand.

I stagger back covering my eye where he hit me.

He doesn't even seem concerned about my eye one bit. I know he didn't mean to hit me, but he did actually smack me, and I feel a bruise forming already. Doesn't he care that I'm standing here crying, clutching at my eye?

He doesn't look at me as he speaks again. "I'm late for work."

* * *

 **Bella Pov**

Later that day, I finally decide to get up and do something with my life. After Demetri had left I took a long, steaming hot shower. I just let the water run down my body before finally washing my hair. I really just needed that time alone to just think, and just let the flow of thoughts take me away.

The truth is, I didn't even know where to start. I was beginning to see a web. A huge web, full of lies and deceit. And not just my lies, but also the lies of everyone around me. What was Alice hiding? Does Edward have anything to do with it?

I smack my hands to my face in frustration; in an attempt to slow down my thoughts. God, how did I get in the middle of all of this? Falling to the cold tile beneath my feet, letting the hot water fall over me, I pull my legs to my body, holding them tightly to me.

I tell myself that I love Demetri, and I want to be the one that he loves. I want to watch him break records, and earn millions. He is so full of ideas, and I want to be here for him, supporting him along the way as I promised when I agreed to marry him.

Finally, after sitting under the showerhead for what felt like hours, I finally get up and towel myself off to get dressed for my day. I dress comfortably in black boots, and a knit scarf, with my favorite skinny jeans, a long sleeve, hunter green shirt, paired with my leather jacket. I then threw my hair up in a messy bun, and put on my Gucci sunglasses, needing to cover the bruise on my face. Makeup just would not cover it completely seeing as I bruise so easily.

Somehow, I end up in front of Carlisle's house minutes later in hopes of seeing Edward. I had an overwhelming urge to see him and somehow that urge took over my body. It's as if my body calls out for him, and I'm drawn to him like a magnet. Our attraction is like nothing I've ever experienced before. It's as if my brain knows I'm engaged to Demetri, but every fiber of my being craves Edward.

Without even realizing, almost in a zombie-like state, I knock on the door. It's as if I'm watching myself do these things without much control over it. At least, that's what I tell myself. It makes me feel less guilty about the situation when really I am so guilty. I'm actively seeking out Edwards's attention, in desperate need of his company.

Edward swings the door open and his face lights up when he sees me standing there, and a lump forms in my throat as I stare at his beautiful face. How could I possibly marry Demetri knowing there's a guy in the world that looks at me like this? Does Demetri look at me like this and I just never noticed?

I look down quickly, embarrassed but also because I didn't want him to see my face.

He reaches forward putting a hand around my waist, pulling me to him and he catches me by surprise when he kisses my temple. He then releases me, but grabs my hand, pulling me into the house. He closes the door behind us and continues to hold my hand, pulling me down the hall until we stop in front of a room.

He pulls me in slowly, turning to close the door, still clutching on to my hand, squeezing every so often as though he can't believe that I'm real.

Edward makes a move towards the bed, but I shake my hand loose from his grip, deciding that it was best to stay near the door. He turns slowly to face me with his eyebrows knit in confusion.

"I'm good here," I tell him, and watch as he purses his lips at me with his eyebrows still knit, but there's a hint of amusement in his eyes.

He nods his head and shrugs, taking a seat on the end of the bed.

"If you think you're safe over there," He says huskily, before shaking his head in mock disbelief, and the sound of his voice does crazy things to my lady parts, makes me want things that I shouldn't. Then he chuckles lightly when I don't say anything, before scratching behind his ear.

I nod, letting him know that it's true. I would feel better having a conversation with him within a safe distance. I was dangerously close to jumping his bones.

"Okay," He says after a stretch of awkward silence, dragging the word out in an exaggerated way. That's when I notice the look of irritation and sadness on his face, and I instantly want to know what's wrong. I want to help him. I want to take his mind off whatever is bothering him so that I can see his smile that I love. I want to take that look away so badly, which for me is a sure sign that I care about him. I sigh, thinking of how to continue, and not sure how to fill the silence between us. He seems to be stewing.

I come to the conclusion that I care more for him than I should for someone who is just a friend. I need to backtrack, make it known to him exactly where I stand, reestablish our 'friendship'-even though I know it just gives me a guilt free excuse to see him.

"We need to talk. This thing between us has to stop Edward. I'm serious. I love Demetri," I say sternly, determined to just be friends with him and maybe call a truce. I know that I should just stop all communication with him, but the honest to god truth, is that I can't help how badly I miss him when he's not around. He's become a fixture in my life, a part of my daily routine. I'd like that to continue.

"Then why did you come here?" He asks his irritation slowly turning to anger. I can see it in his eyes as he stares at me, before shaking his head, looking away with a scoff, and then pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I have a few questions to ask you," I finally speak, and I see his nostrils flare, as he averts his eyes from me to the floor but wags a finger at me accusingly.

"Good, because I have a few questions of my own. Let's start with you telling me about that bruise." He says without looking at me. I stand there frozen, clutching my purse in my hands. I'd hoped that he wouldn't see the bruise; I didn't want to talk about it. "Take them off." His voice is a roar, and I physically tense at his words.

"What?" I question in a tiny voice.

"Take the shades off, Bella," He all but growls at me. He stands up when he sees that I hadn't made a move. He gives me a threatening look, and I relent, slowly removing the shades from my face.

His face contorts showing a million different emotions before settling on one.

Rage.

His eyes darken and his body begins to shake, as he is unable to control his anger.

"Motherfucker," He mutters angrily through tight lips, his nose flaring, and his jaw clenching, as his hands balled into fists at his side. A storm is raging inside of him, and he looks as if at any moment he'll inflict the damage that is intended. He wants to wreck shit, and I have no doubt that if Demetri was nearby, he'd try to kill him.

The thing that most surprises me is how calm I am. He wants to rip my fiancé to shreds and I'm...calm? That's not normal right?

"Edward it's nothing," I shove my shades back on my face, trying to hide from him. They also hide my facial expressions, so I desperately need them.

"It's nothing? You think it's nothing?" He asks incredulously, and his eyebrows are knit with a pained expression on his face that breaks my heart. I'm responsible for that look on his face. I have to steer the conversation elsewhere.

"Look, Edward, I didn't come here to-" I begin to explain the actual reason that I'm here, but he cuts me off.

"-Did he do that to your face?" He asks me but then takes a deep breath, shoving a hand through his hair, tugging at it, looking around everywhere but at me. He seems lost, and frustrated. He wants to do something but he's stopping himself. He begins a slow pace around the room, running his hands down his face. He's pissed, and I don't know how to feel about his reaction. I know one thing. I don't want them fighting over me.

"It was an accident."

His head whips in my direction and he looks as if he can't believe what he was hearing, but there is nothing that he can do about it at this point.

"Fuck!" He looks up at the ceiling with his hands balled into fists against his eyes. "An accident," He says incredulously. "You're covering for him. Covering for a monster!" His voice cracks and I know that he is slowly losing it.

"I'm not." I defend my fiance and again he doesn't look convinced or pleased with my answer. If anything, what I'm saying is making things worst. "Please just..." My voice breaks and I think he can see that I'd really rather not talk about it. He sighs heavily, shaking his head as he makes his way back over to the bed and takes a seat, but his legs bounce excessively. He rests his elbows on his legs and threads his fingers together behind his head as he takes slow breaths. It seems he's having a hard time calming down, and I want to comfort him. I want to assure him that I'm okay so we can move on.

So I do.

"I'm okay, Edward," I whisper. I hear him mumble something but I can't make out what he says. "Are you okay?" I take a few cautious steps towards him.

"You're the one that's hurt, and you're worried about me?" He looks up at me as he speaks, then he laughs with no trace of humor.

We're silent for a while and I try to find the words to say to ease the tension.

"Can we take a walk?" I ask him and watch as a small smile spreads across his face. We seem to be at our best when we walk, and I really need to get some things out in the open. His room is making it hard to do with all of the tension buzzing between us.

He stands and stalks towards me, and my chest rises and falls heavily as my heart rate speeds up because of his close proximity. I see purpose in his stride and determination in his eyes as he stops in front of me, towering over me.

"Why are you with him? "He whispers softly but with genuine interest. He wants to understand but I don't want to explain myself.

"He's good for me. And I'm happy. That's all my dad ever wanted for me." I whisper just as softly and he shakes his head with furrowed brows, the irritation is back, and I watch as he tries to shake it off.

"He's not good to you." He pushes and I roll my eyes because now I'm getting irritated. He really thinks that he knows what's best for me. We've only known each other a few weeks for god sakes. I tell myself not to hold it against him. He's on the outside looking in on our relationship. He can't know everything Demetri has done for me.

He almost made me forget that I came here for a purpose. I need to know more about Alice's relationship with Edward so that I can tell Demetri and prove that he can trust me with the information about Alice. Why was he having her followed?

I want to know what was going on with the family and I want to fix it. They love each other I just know it. It's one of the main reasons I want to marry Demetri. I love them all so much, and it hurts me that they are keeping secrets from each other. If everything is out in the open, maybe a solution can be found.

I also want to find out know how Alice is connected with all of this. I did find it weird that Edward came out of the blue claiming to be Jasper's friend and Carlisle showed up around the same time, and they just so happen to know each other, also. Ugh, I have way more questions than answers and it's pissing me off.

"You don't know that." My voice grows louder to show him just how offended I am.

His nostrils flare as he takes a heavy breath. He then surprises me when he grabs my hips gently as he takes a step closer to me. His fingers massage my hips slowly and god, it feels so good. How does he always seem to make me forget about everything and focus on him?

My eyes slide closed feeling his body heat radiate through me and his delicious smell envelopes me. He smells fresh and manly, no hint of cologne, just his natural scent, and it's intoxicating.

"I know you," He whispers softly, almost seductively, trying to reel me in. Or maybe I imagined he said it that way. Either way, he's driving me crazy with his touch, and his voice, and I can barely even focus on words or thoughts.

He leans in close, so close he's only a breath away and my mind is completely fuzzy. I open my eyes and I almost melt from the sheer emotion in his eyes. He glances at my lips silently asking for permission but I can't give it to him, but I also don't have the strength to pull away. I want him but I can't keep giving him hope. I can't keep letting him think that this is okay. It's not okay for him to touch me like this, or be this close to me. It's not okay for me to feel this way about him. Nothing about this is okay.

"I want you. "He groans against my lips, not kissing me but just brushing them slowly against mine back and forth taking my breath away. "Tell me you want me and not him." I don't speak; I just hold a breath, waiting for his lips to touch mine.

Just as his lips meet mine for a kiss, the door opens and my head snaps over to see Carlisle peek his head in, his eyes wide with surprise. Edward pulls back slightly but keeps his arms at my hips, and I bow my head completely embarrassed.

Then the reality sets in of what I almost let happen. We almost kissed again. What the hell is wrong with me? I always leave Edward feeling guilty, and torn up on the inside. This isn't me. I'm not a cheater. I have to stop putting myself in these predicaments. Otherwise, the guilt of what I'm doing will kill me sooner than Demetri will if he ever finds out.

My mom always used to say, _'what's done in the dark always comes to the light.'_ She also used to say, _'if you have to do it in the dark, it's something you shouldn't be doing in the first place.'_ She was wise in that way.

My mom was big on telling the truth. Always be truthful, upfront and almost painfully blunt. There was never any confusion where she was concerned. Everyone knew where she stood because she never had a problem letting people know how she felt. I guess I'm more like my dad in the way that I have my secrets, and they will hopefully follow me to my grave as his did. Some secrets are worth keeping, and sadly, some eat away like guilt. This is the reason I feel like absolute shit every time I think about the fact that I'm cheating on my fiancé.

I pull out of Edward's embrace and turn to face Carlisle. He doesn't say anything nor does he even look my way and the expression on his face is unreadable.

"Carlisle," Edward says, and I hear Carlisle clear his throat.

"A word?" Carlisle says and I look up in time to see him move away from the door. Edward looks down at me and the fire in his eyes lets me know that this isn't over. He bends to peck my lips once, twice, before walking out of the door behind Carlisle.

Fuck, Carlisle! He must think I'm a terrible person. Demetri is his nephew and he'd just seen me in an intimate embrace with Edward. I have to stop doing this before it gets out of hand.

I look around the empty room trying to remember why I even came.

Oh yeah, I'm Demetri's personal spy.

* * *

 **Do you ladies think Edward should back off? ... And what do you think Carlisle thinks about this?**

 **Your reviews mean everything to me. Thank you all for reading. :)**


	9. Chapter 9

Fran you are amazing! Thank you so much for being my beta! :)

 _Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers._

Chapter 9

"What was that about?" I ask Edward once we exit Carlisle's home. Edward glances over at me and then waves his hand, trying to dismiss the thought.

"It's nothing," He says quickly before rethinking his reply. "Just uh, Carlisle is mentoring me, teaching me a few things. He wants me to work for him." He smiles and I can tell that he's quite happy with the idea of working for Carlisle. "He wanted to do a few things today, but I told him that I'd much rather spend my day with you." He gives me a side-glance and a crooked smile.

What do I say to that?

"Plus, I'm not up for the stuffy office work today" He fills the awkward silence and I give him a thankful smile.

"We should go to Leah's." Instantly filled with excitement, I grasp his arm and tug.

He shoots me a confused look, but then grins when he sees the look on my face. "Leah's?" He questions.

"Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry. I mean Leah's café … Where we go every morning."

He nods and glances at me again, still grinning and I must say it's one of his sexier grins that has my heart doing flips in my chest. "You know the owner?"

"Yea, she's an old friend."

"Is that why you go there so often?"

"You sure do ask a lot of questions," I joke with him, playfully nudging his shoulder. "But you won't offer any information about yourself."

"What do you want to know? My favorite color?" He chuckles and I purse my lips trying to hide my grin. "Another thing we have in common."

I glance up at him quizzically.

"My favorite color is also blue."

"And you're not just saying that?" I bump him with my arm teasing him, and he all but smirks at me.

"I wouldn't lie about something so small," He says and I can't help but think about the task at hand. He does lie, though, but apparently, it's okay as long as it's for a good reason.

I decide to continue joking with him. "So big lies are okay?"

He laughs it off and I wonder for a second if he's even going to bother answering me.

"Lying is never okay, but sometimes it's unavoidable." He all of a sudden looks serious, and I wonder just how much he's lied. "Some things can't be told right away," He looks at me and I see guilt written all over his face, he almost looks in pain. What exactly is he hiding?

"You mean something bad?"

"I mean something that could possibly hurt someone," He stops walking and turns to me, reaching out to grab my jacket at my sides, halting my steps. He stares deep into my eyes, trapping me in his hypnotic gaze. "Or something that you want to say but can't because of the timing."

"That doesn't sound like a lie. That sounds like a secret."

He lifts one shoulder in a light shrug. "I guess it is."

"Do you have a secret?" I jokingly raise an eyebrow and he smirks.

"I'm full of secrets Bella," He releases my jacket, reaching down for my hand, lacing them together. "Come on," He gently tugs me so that we can continue walking to our destination.

Carlisle Pov

"Carlisle," I hear Demetri call through my home and I sigh heavily, not prepared to deal with my nephew today. He finds me in my office, and he roughly pushes my door open.

"Bella's car is outside, "He says, stating the obvious. He points back with his thumb in the direction that he'd just come from. "Is she here?"

"Good morning to you too Demetri. Can I get you anything?"

"I'm really not in the mood. Is she here or not?" He demands an answer and I quite honestly don't appreciate his tone.

"How about you call your dear fiancé? I am not her keeper."

"Don't fuck with me, Carlisle. Today is most definitely not the day. "He takes a threatening step towards me as if I'm the one that should stand down.

"Demetri, you will learn to respect your elders."

He throws his head back exasperatedly, rolling his head, losing patience. "It's a simple question. "He shakes his head. "I can see that you are of no use to me. I'll just be on my way to the office. "He makes a move for the door.

"You will not." I tell him and he pauses quickly, squaring his shoulders before turning back to face me. "I will be taking my place at Cullen investors Inc."

His eyes narrow at me. "I'm not just going to relinquish my position to you because you finally feel like working."

"I've already spoken with the board. The company is rightfully mine, and I will not have you run it to the ground."

"Run it to the ground? Run it to the fucking ground, Carlisle? Without me, your whole life would be shit right now all because you decided you couldn't handle your wife's death."

At the mention of my wife, I instantly grow angry. Generally, I am a very even-tempered man, but I have no patience for Demetri. I never have. He's so much like his father it sickens me. I try so hard not to hold a grudge against him just because of all of the things that his father has done to me over the years, but when he acts like this...like his father...I lose it.

"Demetri, I'm only going to say this once and then I want you to leave my home. I appreciate what you did for me in my absence but-"

"I'm the only one that cared enough to-" He tries to cut me off.

"Let me finish!" I raise my voice and his jaw clenches as his fists ball up at his sides. "I'm back now, and I have seen and heard what you have been up to in my absence and I will not have my family's company ruined."

"Carlisle, I'm family. Why would I want to ruin the company?"

"Because you are greedy," I growl at him because he knows damn well what he has been up to. I don't know the complete story yet, but I know that he's been into something shady. "Greed is a bottomless pit that exhausts a person in an endless effort to satisfy a need without ever reaching that satisfaction. Demetri, you will never be satisfied." He thinks that he can get away with his illegal activity and his corrupt, underhanded ways, but I know the truth and I am trying my best to stay two steps ahead of him.

I loved him to death when he was younger, but he's always been a little shit and a pain in my ass.

"You forget that I also lost my parents when you lost your wife, and I stayed. I busied myself while you ran away like a coward. I worked, and I've made you a lot of fucking money. This is the thanks that I get?"

"I said all that I have to say. You may leave." I dismiss him, looking back down at my paperwork, which shows that he hasn't made me money, in fact, large sums are missing and he's lucky that we can cover for the loss. Otherwise, this conversation would take a turn for the worse.

"This is why your wife left you in the first place! You're selfish."

I slowly stand from the desk, willing him to shrink under my stare. "Leave. Now."

He turns but stops at the door. "This isn't over Carlisle!"

"One more thing Demetri," I say through gritted teeth trying to regain control of my anger. "I'm speaking to you now as your uncle. I saw the bruise on Bella's face."

Demetri slowly turns. "That," He pauses, giving me a look of pure hatred, "Is none of your goddamn business."

"Oh, but it is."

He takes a step forward and scuffs, averting his eyes from me to the floor. And when he looks up he stares me square in the eyes and flares his nostrils making a face of disgust. Then he sighs and takes a breath.

"Okay. Okay. This is obviously a misunderstanding. You think I beat my fiancé, so now you're taking me off the board. Is that it?"

"No. I know that you do, and regardless of that fact, you are dismissed from your position at my company."

"You are making a mistake." He turns to walk out and calls back to me. "One that you will regret."

Bella Pov

After my walk with Edward, I quickly head home to get things ready for my meeting with Rose to go over some more details for the wedding. He wanted to spend the entire day together but I simply couldn't, I have a million and one things to do before the wedding and it's only a month away. Plus, he needed to get some work done with Carlisle.

"Babe," I hear from the front of the house. "I got you something. Where are you?"

I decide to play with him a little, seeing as I'm trying harder to mend our relationship. "Come and find me," I call down to him in a teasing voice.

He huffs, and I hear him from the bottom of the staircase. "I don't have time for this Bella."

I roll my eyes and come out of my hiding space in the room and slowly walk down the stairs. I see him holding a Tiffany's box and I instantly perk up, smiling brightly.

"I want you to wear this tonight." He gives it to me and then starts for the door as I open it, but I don't look at it yet. I look up at his retreating form.

"You're just going to buy me something and leave? You're not even going to wait for me to open it?"

Demetri sighs impatiently, and pushes back his suit jacket in a flash, resting his hand on his hip. He turns to me huffing again. He's agitated, and I want to ask about it but I know he won't discuss anything with me.

"Bella, I have..." He sighs as he stops in front of me. "...a lot of shit going on right now."

"What's going on? Can I help?" I ask with concern, placing a hand on his arm. He lets out a frustrated laugh, shaking his head.

"You wouldn't understand."

"Make me understand. Tell me. Let me help." I all but beg. How can I help him if he's always so closed off and distant?

He takes my face in both hands and I already know what's coming. He's going to kiss my forehead and dismiss me.

I was right.

When he releases me, he points to the box in my hand. "Go try that on, and find something nice to wear to dinner at Carlisle's."

Dinner at Carlisle's means I get to see Edward.

Bella Pov

"Guess the guy feels fucking guilty, huh?" Edward asks and I roll my eyes at him.

"Keep your voice down," I whisper-shout, glancing at the door.

"What's that a six...seven hundred dollar necklace? Hell of a way to apologize without saying the actual words." I can see the underlying anger he attempts to hide in his deep green eyes.

I have no words to say, I'm so at a lost on what to do here.

"Guys, Eva's putting the food out," Rose calls from the door, and we nod, walking in. A few minutes later, I'm sitting between Demetri and Alice, across from Edward, and I am uncomfortable as hell. Edward has his intense green eyes on me the entire time and my dear fiancé notices. He leans into my ear.

"Edward and I are going to have to have a conversation."

I instantly stiffen, because nothing good will come of that. I had to beg Edward not to talk to Demetri about his behavior, and it looks like he kept his promise. But now Demetri was about to mess that up.

"About what?" I try to sound casual, as though I have no idea why that would be needed. However, when I look up, I see Demetri's eyes lift too, and we are both met with Edward's stare.

Demetri puts an arm around me, pulling me closer, and when I look over at him, I see that he's looking at Edward with a smirk. Edwards gaze moves from me to Demetri and he glares.

I feel Demetri's shoulders shake with laughter, dangerous laughter before he leans down to kiss my shoulder, moving to my ear.

"If he keeps staring at you like you're a piece of meat, I'll be forced to remove both of his eyes from his head." I turn to him because honestly I kind of believe that he'll do it. I take his face in my hands so he looks at me.

"There's nothing for you to be worried about."

He nods and I see a cocky smile on his face as he takes a bite of his food, before leaning back to speak in my ear.

"Apparently you haven't made it clear to him that you are mine, so now it is my turn."

I sigh heavily, realizing that there is nothing that I can do but make sure that they don't kill each other.

"This ring and necklace say it all." I run my hand over the eighteen-karat gold pendant necklace engraved with his initial that he bought today.

Demetri kisses my lips softly, and I follow his gaze to Edward as he sits back in his chair with a satisfied grin on his face.

"Excuse me," Edward excuses himself. Seconds later, I hear the front door slam.

Demetri slowly stands, and I pull his arm to make him sit back down but he doesn't. He pulls away following Edward out the front door.

Nobody notices that they are both gone except for Carlisle, and we exchange looks before he quickly excuses himself as well. At least, they have a mediator.

I sigh.

Now, what do I do?

* * *

I think they need more than a mediator to solve their issues. Why doesn't Bella just put them out of their misery and choose?

Does everyone believe Demetri is a bad guy?...Maybe we just don't see the whole picture yet...Why doesn't anyone question Alice's motives?

Just little things to think about. :)

I haven't done much Fanfiction reading this week, only novels, If I were you by Lisa Renee Jones, and Twist Me Series (3 amazing books) by Anna Zaires.

What are you Ladies reading? I need new Fanfiction recs.

Please review!


	10. Chapter 10

It's been awhile but I'm back to regular updates on Mondays!

Thank you Fran for your awesome beta skills. You're amazing! :)

 _I do not own Twilight. These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers_.

* * *

Chapter 10:

Edward Pov

I pull out a cigarette and light it, looking up at the sky, trying to get Bella off my mind, even for just a second. With the cigarette to my lips, I take a long pull and push a palm to my temple in a feeble attempt to slow my racing thoughts. I hear the front door close behind me, and I turn to see Demetri. I hold in a deep breath and count to five, because if I don't fucking calm down I'm going to end up going on a rampage. The beast held inside of me is just waiting for him to press the wrong button.

I hear him let out a laugh as he makes his way over to me. He clears his throat but doesn't speak. I don't even bother acknowledging his presence.

"I need to clear something up for you, Edward." He begins.

"And what's that?" I reply without turning to face him. I hear the front door open and close again, and this time, it's Carlisle.

"What's going on here?" Carlisle asks.

I shrug nonchalantly. "Your nephew was just about to clear something up for me." I hear Demetri laugh and I turn quickly, closing the space between us, begging him to give me another fucking reason.

"I was hoping that we could have a man to man conversation, but I see that it's impossible with you."

The nerve of this fucking guy! He beats his fiancee and thinks he's a man. He's a fucking coward, and I tell him so.

"A man wouldn't beat on his women, but a bitch would. So I think that it's clear what I think of you. How about you hit me? Prove that you're a man, because right now..." I size him up in disgust. "... All I see is a bitch who isn't worthy of Bella."

He takes a step back and laughs, seemingly unaffected by my words. He looks over at Carlisle, who is standing in silence watching our exchange.

"And you ... you think you're worthy? You're worthy of her?" He laughs and I swear the smug look on his face almost pushes me over the edge. "Listen, Edward, we need to come to an understanding. I want you to stay the hell away from Bella. The next breath that you take near Bella will surely be your last so I would take heed my warning if I were you."

"Okay," Carlisle says, walking between us. He catches my gaze and guides me towards the front door. "Go inside."

I have the utmost respect for Carlisle, so when he says to do something, I do it without hesitation. "I will handle this." He says, and although I don't want him fighting my battles for me, I know that if I stay one more second, the night will end with me in jail.

Bella Pov

"I own you."

I wake up in a jolt, sweating and clearly panicked from a nightmare. My breath comes faster, shallower. I clutch at my chest, it feels like it will burst with every tremor of fear that climbs up my insides and slides back down, giving me the butterfly effect. Then I fumble around my room in the dead of night to turn on the light.

I look to Demetri's side of the bed to see it empty. He hadn't come back home after he dropped me off. He was so pissed that Carlisle had made him leave, but still, that's no excuse.

Where is he?

I grab my phone and call him and it goes straight to voicemail. I slam my phone back on the nightstand and push my hair out of my face, trying to forget the dream that I'd just had.

It's no use. I'd been having dreams about Edward more and more frequently, and most of them were sexual. I wasn't having sex with Demetri because I wanted to wait until our wedding night, yet here I am having the dirtiest of thoughts and dreams about Edward. There is no denying that I want him.

I had to talk to someone about it, and the only person that I can think of is Leah. So I dial her number quickly, not caring that it's nearly three in the morning.

"Hello." She answers, sleep thick in her voice. I almost feel bad for waking her up, but not enough to hang up.

"I really need to talk to someone," I say in a tiny voice, hoping she can sense how urgent this is. She does, and it's evident in her words.

"What's wrong Bells?" She's awake now, and close to panicking. I must sound worse than I thought. I really am messed up in the head. How can I love Demetri and want to spend the rest of my life with him, while still having the thoughts about Edward?

"It's about Demetri. Well, not entirely, I just-"

"Spit it out." She urges.

"There's this guy-" I begin but she cuts me off.

"Not Demetri?" She asks and I shake my head no, as if she could see me.

"No, I met this guy a few weeks ago, and I can't stop thinking about him"

Silence.

She doesn't say anything for the longest time and I wonder for a second if she hung up.

"Did you cheat on Demetri?" Of course, she would jump to that conclusion.

"No." Not necessarily. "I've just been having dreams about him, and he's on my mind constantly, and I just-"

"Bella, you're engaged," She states the obvious.

"I know. I know. And I owe Demetri my life for all he's done for me. I just ... I don't know ... just tell me what you think I should do."

She sighs heavily. "I never asked you before, but do you love Demetri? Are you in love with him?"

"I love him. He's great."

She chuckles and I sit there stunned. What about this is funny?

"That's not how you talk about someone you love."

I roll my eyes. "Then again, you've never been normal so I don't know what I expected."

"Leah? Help me!"

"What do you want me to say, Bella? You made your decision. You agreed to marry Demetri."

"Yea, but-"

"No buts, Bella. I will never support unfaithfulness. If you called for my blessing to cheat, I can't give it to you."

"I don't know what I was thinking. I love Demetri. He adores me."

"Are you sure?"

That confuses me. Didn't she basically just tell me to be faithful and stop obsessing over a guy that I don't know?

"You just told me-"

"Bella, I just want to make sure that you're making the right decisions for you, and not just marrying a guy out of obligation, or just because you made a commitment. You may have felt a certain way about Demetri, but sadly, feelings are fickle. Trust me, I'm speaking from experience."

I sigh dramatically, and she laughs. "I'm back to square one." I say, and she laughs again.

"So, describe this guy." She sounds very interested and I perk up, excited about talking about Edward.

"God, Leah the man is so fucking sexy, like blow your mind sexy. He's drop dead, throw your panties at him sexy. That's why this is so hard. And I'm so, so, so, attracted to him." I usually have a hard time not staring at him. I mean Demetri is hot, don't get me wrong. But Edward is just rugged and just so, so perfect. It's hard to keep my hands to myself when I'm near him. My hands literally itch to touch him, especially last night. He looked extremely fuckable with a day's worth of scruff, and his usual tousled hair extra messy from all the tugging. His sex hair brought dirty thoughts to my head and I had to spend most of the night looking everywhere but at him.

"If he's so good looking, he must have a terrible personality."

"No. He's perfect. Leah, he's so sweet and considerate like-" I search for the right words. "I don't know. He just makes me feel things that I've never ever felt before."

"Like what?"

"He makes me giddy, Leah! I feel nervous when he's around, but I want him around like all the time. I feel more like myself when I'm around him, and it just feels good. It feels right."

"It feels right." She says the words slowly.

"It's silly, I know."

"No, it's not." We sit silently for a while before she finally breaks the silence. "I honestly don't know what to tell you Bells. I don't want to be responsible for steering you in the wrong direction. Is that selfish of me?"

"Of course not! I didn't really call for a solution. I just really needed to talk to someone about it."

"Was I the first person that you called?" She asks excitedly, and I laugh.

"Of course. I tell you everything."

"Well, I'm flattered." She laughs again, and then silence passes over us. "You deserve to be happy, Bells. Do whatever makes you happy."

"I will."

"See you later at the cafe," She says it more like a question.

"I will be there."

I spend the rest of the morning staring at the ceiling, thinking about Edward. I can't get him out of my fucking head. I close my eyes and it's his eyes that I see. It's his touch that I feel all over me, lighting me on fire. It's his gaze that's before my eyes, looking at me like I'm a treasure; the only woman in the world. The only woman for him.

That morning when I get to the cafe, Edward isn't there and I have to admit that I miss him. I miss the way he teases me and makes me talk even though he knows that I'm usually in my own world, in my own head. He seems to want to understand my world, and he interjects himself into it. His interest in me is thrilling, and I've come to crave his attention. I've come to crave the look he gives me when I call him out on something and the look in his eyes when I challenge him. I miss his smile so much, it's as if I didn't even realize his effect on me.

I pout the entire time that Alice talks to me about her new client and eventually she catches on to my mood and she asks if everything is okay. I nod my head and look out of the window, which stops her inquiry.

"Have you talked to Edward?" She asks giving me a knowing look.

My eyes widen, nervous that she could quite possibly know something. Oh god, what if Edward told her something? "No. Why would I?" I answer quickly, too quickly, and she notices.

She laughs, looking at me over her coffee cup, shaking her head. "It's just a question Bella. Jesus!"

I relax and she continues to laugh.

"He said that he'd be here." She puts her cup down and looks at her watch. "I'm supposed to be upset with him." She folds her arms across her chest.

"Why?" I'm really curious. Alice doesn't really ever get upset, and I'm hoping that she gives me a reason not to like him so that I can squash these feelings, or whatever this is.

"He quit his job. Now Jasper is struggling to look for a replacement." She says sadly, and for some reason, I feel the need to defend him. He has a great opportunity on his hands and I'm sure if Alice knew that she would understand.

"Alice, he had to. He got an offer he couldn't refuse." I explain to her, remembering what he'd told me the day before.

"What offer?" She furrows her eyebrows. As close as she seems to be to him, I was quite surprised that she didn't know.

"Carlisle offered him a job." I tell her and watch as a big smile spreads across her face, and she sits up straighter in her seat.

"Really? That's great! I wish he'd told me himself last night, but I'm still so happy for him. That's so awesome!" She beams and I can tell that she is genuinely happy for him, and I find myself smiling because honestly, I'm happy for him too.

"Can I ask you something? I'm asking as your friend, not as your cousin's fiancée." I began and Alice rolls her eyes.

"Of course Bella."

I take a deep breath. "What do you really think of your cousin?"

Her face drops. "I told you before Bella. He's a douche, but he's family and my dad always says, take care of the family. Unfortunately, that includes that asshat."

I laugh at her facial expression. She gets so worked up talking about Demetri even though they are so cordial in family settings. They all seem to hate each other secretly, but when they are all together, no one would know. I've been around the family for almost two years now, and only recently did I realize this.

"I honestly don't understand how you put up with him, or why you agreed to marry him."

"He's done so much for me and my family. He took care of both of my parents' funerals. My dad's last words were about him. He pointed out how well he treats me. He treats me like a princess, Alice. I can't just ignore that." It's that simple, and she should understand.

"Right..." She rolls her eyes and folds her arms over her chest. "It's as if you're trying to convince yourself." I carefully think about her words, wondering if they are true.

Demetri was so persistent in his pursuit of me, and I fell hard for him. He was so sweet, and gentlemanly. I wasn't used to that, and he made me feel like a princess. I wake up every morning feeling as if I am in a fairytale, and isn't it every girl's dream to marry the prince? It's not so much about the money, but the security. Knowing that I will never have to worry about anything because he takes such good care of me.

"Alice, you know how I feel about Demetri."

She nods in spite of herself, and then sighs. "I know. I just wish you had time to explore. Time to find out if he's really what you want for the rest of your life." She tilts her head to the side, examining me.

"Alice..." I let out a laugh. "He's your cousin."

"And you're my best friend, Bella. I want you to be happy. I want you with someone that makes you feel how Jasper makes me feel every day."

I reach across the table for her hand and squeeze. "I am."

"What about Edward?" She asks all of a sudden, catching me off guard. I pull my hand away quickly.

"What about Edward?"

She shoots me the look. You know the look. The one that says 'you know what the fuck I'm talking about', and 'don't play fucking stupid.' She mastered that look, and I can't help but laugh.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I take a drink of tea.

"God you're dense." She says exasperatedly and rests her palm against her forehead. "The poor guy is so into you that he can barely function or think straight."

I lift a shoulder in a shrug and continue to drink my tea.

"We established our relationship. We're friends."

"Bullshit! You two exude sexual tension; I'm surprised you make it through the morning without ripping off each other's clothes." She rolls her eyes. "You owe it to yourself to explore that. See if there's something more between you two before you make a mistake and ultimately make an ass out of yourself when you're ready to divorce that bastard."

"You're telling me to cheat on your cousin?" I raise an eyebrow and she mumbles something that sounds a lot like, 'am I not speaking English?'

"Not what I said. Just talk to him with an open mind. Be open to the possibility that he may be the one for you."

"I don't know Alice. I don't even know if we have anything beyond this attraction. It may just be lust, and I don't want to go down that road only to be left there."

It's her turn to reach over and squeeze my hand. "Trust me Bella; what he feels for you is far beyond lust. He may want to screw your brains out, but it's more than that. We talk, and usually he only talks about you. He has feelings for you, and I know you're scared, but so is he."

I nod in understanding, not wanting to continue this conversation. I have so much to think about.

Edward Pov

"Hey, I'm going to need your help this week," Carlisle says looking through paperwork on his desk. He looks up when I don't speak. "Is that going to be a problem?"

"No, it's not a problem. I would like my mornings free." I tell him and he sighs heavily, his shoulders drop instantaneously.

"Edward..." He starts speaking as if he's talking to a child. "You've got to stop."

I let out a humorless laugh, and I fold my arms across my chest. "You know I can't do that."

He sighs again, and then sits down at his desk. He then rests his elbows on top and rubs his temples. "You're putting me in a bind with this, Edward."

Now it's my turn to sigh. "I don't even want you in the middle Carlisle. As far as I'm concerned this has nothing to do with you."

"You say that it doesn't but I know my nephew. He already told me to kick you out of my house because of the way that you spoke to him." Carlisle explains, and that makes me laugh. Then I think about how Carlisle probably stood up for me, and my smile falls. Now I completely understand the predicament that he's in.

I clear my throat.

"Thank you for sticking up for me." I tell him and watch as he looks up with furrowed eyebrows and dismisses the thought.

"You're my son in every sense of the word. Of course, I did."

"I know, I just ... he's your nephew so-"

"We aren't exactly seeing eye to eye right now." I know what he's referring to. When he pulled me to the side and I told him that his nephew hit Bella, he was just as pissed as I was.

As if we spoke him into existence, Demetri opens the office door and walks inside. This is the first time that I've seen him without his usual suit, and it just reminds me of how different we are from each other.

"Carlisle, I need to-" He stops talking when he sees me standing there. He smirks in my direction and walks further into the office. "I need to speak with you in private."

I stare daggers at the son of a bitch from across the way, noticing how he squares his shoulders and turns to face me.

"He's fine here. What do you need?" Carlisle says, and Demetri looks taken aback by his statement.

"This is business, Carlisle-"

"-I said he's fine," Carlisle cuts him off curtly.

Demetri looks up heavenward and sucks his teeth like the fucking child I know him to be. "I need you to keep an eye on Bella."

"I thought this was business,"Carlisle asked standing straighter and throwing wary glances my way.

"Bella is my business and I don't want him near her." Demetri points at me and I snort. He came all this way to ask Carlisle to keep his fiancée away from me.

Carlisle clears his throat. "Surely you know that they are both adults."

"I fucking swear Carlisle- sometimes I don't know whose side you're on." Demetri says and then his phone rings. He looks down at it and shakes his head, before holding up a finger and walking out of the office.

I point back at the door with my thumb. "This guy." Then I shake my head. He's out of his mind if he thinks his little threats will derail me one bit. I make a move for the door but Carlisle stops me.

"I have a few things to show you. Don't go too far."

I nod in understanding and make my way next door to my room to take a shower and get dressed for my day.

Later, I get a call from Alice begging me to go out clubbing tonight. She says that the guy Rose is dating owns a club and that he got us all in VIP. After all of the begging, pleading, and guilt tripping, I finally relent, and she tells me that she will pick me up in a few hours.

A few hours later, I hear a knock at the front door, and I'm pleasantly surprised when I see Bella standing there dressed in a sexy, little black dress with fuck me heels that make her legs look a hell of a lot longer. Mother of Christ! I don't even try to hide the fact that I'm eye fucking her, and she raises an eyebrow at me.

I give her a smile, and then lick my lips as I look her up and down again. "You are sexy as fuck."

She doesn't speak; she just folds her arms across her chest and raises an eyebrow.

"You ready or not?" She asks with an attitude and I laugh at her expression. Is she mad at me? The fuck did I do?

I reach out for her waist but she moves away quickly. "Keep your hands to yourself, Edward. I'm serious."

I hold up my hands in surrender and back away from her. "Fine. I won't touch you." I tell her and then walk forward till I'm right in front of her. I lean down to speak in her ear. "But believe me, my eyes will be on you all night." I hear her breath hitch and I smile, satisfied with the reaction that I received.

"Come on." I tug her arm and she looks up at me as if to ask, 'what are you playing at." Then a thought crosses my mind as we make our way to her car. I open the driver's side door for her and she thanks me before sliding inside.

I hope to God Demetri's not going clubbing with us. I can't endure a full night of him feeling Bella up in front of me.

"Will Demetri be meeting you at the club tonight?"

She drives out of the driveway, pulling onto the road before answering me. She gives me a questioning glance.

"What kind of a question is that?" She laughs, and I raise an eyebrow.

"I just thought-maybe he wouldn't let you out of his sight." I say and she laughs louder.

"Oh, so you think because I'm engaged I can't go out and have fun with friends?"

That's not at all what I was implying, so I don't answer, I just look at her. "No, Edward, I don't plan on seeing Demetri tonight at the club. If you must know, he left for New York early this morning. We were supposed to spend the day together but he-" she clears her throat, and shifts in her seat. "He forgot."

He forgot? Right. You don't forget a woman like Bella.

We sit in comfortable silence staring out the windshield. Thirty minutes later, we pull in front of a club that I was unaware existed. As soon as the car stops, I rush to open Bella's door, and she looks up at me flashing that drop-dead, gorgeous smile that could light up my world in the darkest of times. I'm aware that I'm blatantly staring at her, and she looks down embarrassed. But when she looks up, she's blushing, and fuck me if it's not the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life.

I slowly inch my hand to her face. "Fuck, you're beautiful." I cup her face in my hand and she blinks up at me.

"Thank you," She answers in a whispered voice. I shake my head of the fog, trying to remember where I am. I was lost in her big brown eyes, completely drowning in them, and loving every minute of it. I drop my hand quickly and stand up straight, shaking my head again to clear my mind. I'm seconds away from pushing her against her car and fucking her brains out. I want her so fucking bad, my dick is crying from being so fucking close yet so far.

I hold my arm out for her to loop with mine, and she rolls her eyes as she does every time I pull this, and then she laughs.

"I will never get used to this." She laughs but her arm goes around mine and we walk towards the club.

"I thought Alice was picking me up," I remember the conversation I had with Alice.

"I live closer to you so she asked me to." Bella explains and I nod. "Hold on, she told me to call her when we get here." Bella pulls her arm free. "Do you have your phone?"

I nod and give it to her. She dials Alice's number and waits for her to answer. Minutes later, Alice walks out of a side door with Jasper, Rose, and ... shit, is that?

It can't be who I think it is.

"Holy fucking shit! Edward?"

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You all can probably easily guess who the guy is...

I still want to hear your guess. :)

Please rec some new stories.


	11. Chapter 11

Hi everyone. I hope that you all are supporting all of the great contest that are going on this month. I have read some amazing stories this week.

Check these out for great one shots

Twilight and Fifty Shades of Grey cheating contest

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Straight Thru The Heart

Read, review, fav, follow, voting starts in a few weeks.

Once again this story has been beta'd by the lovely SunflowerFran. I dont have to tell you all how awesome she is, most of you already know. Thank you Fran! :)

Disclaimer: I do not own twilight. These characters belong to SM.

* * *

Edward Pov

"Shit, bro, It's me, Emmett!" He shouts in the boisterous voice that I remember so well. He looks exactly the same, he just got a hell of a lot bigger. He looks more like a club bouncer than a club owner, but I keep my opinion to myself and I just stare. I know that I have no right to be angry but I am.

If he owns this joint, I'm sure he had enough money to come looking for me, just as Carlisle's brothers looked for him. It's not like I left town, I was right under his fucking nose, in plain sight for all these years.

I used to pray that I would see Emmett and Esme again. I prayed daily that I would walk in the library one day, and she'd be there, and Emmett would pat my back and give me a hug. I dreamed that they welcomed me back with open arms.

Later in life I realized it wasn't going to happen. How could they welcome me back after what I did? I murdered Emmetts dad, my mother's husband...how could they ever forgive me?

Then something occurs to me and I am horror stricken. What if he tells Bella what I did? What will she think of me then?

Years and years of guilt that heavily weighed on my chest for years toppled over, leaving me momentarily in shock. I just stare at him, not paying attention to Bella tugging my arm, or Alice's questioning stare, or Rose's skeptically narrowed eyes moving between Emmett and I. I ignore them all not able to move, and apparently my hearing also went out because all that I hear is a slight ringing in my ears, or maybe it's a buzz, either way it's fucking with me and I can't handle it.

Without a word to anyone, I turn on my heels and start walking away from the group, down the sidewalk, shoving my hands in my pockets. I have to get the fuck away from them all. I need to think.

"Edward!" I hear Bella call my name from behind me, but I continue to walk. She catches up to me and tugs my arm. "What the hell?"

I give her a skeptical look, before shaking my shoulder, brushing past her, and walking away again. She matches my steps but doesn't speak. I'm surprised she can keep up with those fuck me heels on. I hear her sigh from beside me.

"Are we going to talk about what just happened?" She steps in front of me stopping me from continuing forward. She then reaches forward grabbing my bicep to steady her while she removed her shoes.

"You should head back. It's cold out here."

She looks up at me, concern written all over her face. "What about you?" She points at me, with furrowed eyebrows, standing back upright with her shoes in her hand.

"I'm not going in there." I tell her with a side step to continue walking.

She's next to me again in a flash, and she stops in front of me, putting her palm to my chest. I huff in annoyance. How the fuck am I supposed to be able to think straight with her here?

Grabbing her hand off of my chest, I take a step to her. "I want you to go back with your friends and enjoy your night." I release her hand, and stare in her eyes waiting for her to nod in understanding. Instead she folds her arms across her chest, a defiant look marred her beautiful features.

"I'm not going in unless you come with me. I'm not just going to leave you out here."

I shake my head looking down at the ground, not wanting her around me right now. Not while I'm working shit out in my head.

"Edward I'm here rather you like it or not." That sentence-scratch that- the way that she says that sentence, causes my head to snap up and look into her warm brown caring eyes. I'll give her anything she asks for when she looks at me like that.

She gives me a small smile trying to lift my spirits. She walks forward, looking up at me. "Now tell me what's going on."

I look deep into her eyes, losing myself in them, forgetting the pain in my chest, forgetting all of my guilt, forgetting any and everything that isn't standing right in front of me because nothing matters at this moment but her and that fucking look on her face. That angelic glow around her is hard to ignore. It's comforting, inviting, tender... I want to wake up to this look for the rest of my life. I swear I would do anything for a meer glimpse at her smile each and every morning.

She stands there waiting for a reply to a question that I don't even remember her asking. That's how lost I am in her presence.

"Edward." She takes another step toward me, her chest near me, her heat warming me inside out.

"I-" I can't even form a sentence, I don't even know where to begin. I hesitate again, open and close my mouth, no words could explain this. I mean, obviously words can explain, but they just weren't coming to me.

I break away from her stare, knowing that's the only way that I could clear my head. I stretch my arms out and a humorless laugh escapes me.

"Life is fucking funny." I laugh again and she just stares at me. I must look like a fucking lunatic to her. "It's funny as hell. The story, I mean. I'm a tragic fuck up, and apparently nothing good will ever come to me. I just-" I sigh. "You think you're doing the right thing, I mean, you really believe that shit, and then it bites you in the ass." I laugh again, and turn away from her, closing my eyes as the events of that night flash before my eyes on playback like a fucking movie. The visions, and thoughts that I spent years trying to repress all rush back to my memory at the sight of Emmett.

"Edward..." I feel her hand on my shoulder but I shake her off.

"I'm the fucking bad guy here, Bella. Don't show me any sympathy." I turn to face her, and her eyes are beseeching and they unravel me so fully that I can't believe that I'm even thinking about talking to her about this. Nobody knows the full story, and I've never had the courage to talk about it before now, and its shocking. I'm so in aww of this woman, so in love with her, so trusting in her that I let the words fall from my mouth without a second thought.

"Emmett is my stepbrother, and I killed his father."

Fear, uncertainty, apprehension all cross her face, and she takes a slow unsteady step back away from me. I hold a hand out towards her needing to explain. Of course she's scared. She doesn't know me well enough to know that I'm not some random psychotic murderer.

"Let me explain."

"I am, I'm just...I'm in shock." Her words surprise me. I was prepared to chase her and make her listen to me, make her understand. If only so she can tell me that I'm not the monster that I feel like I am. I tell her everything, from beginning to end, leaving out the fact that I'm homeless, leaving out that I ran away with nowhere to go. She didn't ask any questions, she just listened, nodding at the appropriate times.

When I was done telling her everything, I actually felt a weight lift from my shoulders. I had been holding it in for so long, I didn't realize how badly I just needed to talk to someone.

"So now you know who I really am." I tell her and she looks away for a second, her eyes scanning her surroundings, trying to find the words to say. She folds her arms across her chest and licks her lips, before turning her gaze back to me.

"You know who you really are? A man who would do anything to protect the one he loves. You are strong, you're so strong, I wish I had your strength, Edward." She takes a step towards me, looking right into my eyes, her eyebrows low, showing all the emotion and all the support that I need right now. "I know you're not a bad person. You aren't malicious, you wouldn't just kill a man just because you felt like it. He hurt your mom. He's the bad guy. He is, not you. Do you understand?"

I nod, needing to hear that, especially from her. She takes me by the hand. "As your friend, I recommend you talk to your brother."

With a heavy sigh, I look down and reluctantly nod at her suggestion. She tugs me back towards the club and I go willingly figuring if Rose is dating him now, I'm sure this won't be the last time that I see him.

After a long while of comfortable silence, Bella speaks. "Can I ask you something?"

I nod in answer. "Okay, so I get the feeling that Alice is trying to hook us up, which is crazy, right?" She begins and I laugh because it's fucking unexpected.

"This is definitely going to take my mind off of my impossibly damning conversation with my brother, thank you Bella." I laugh, and she shoots me a look that only makes me laugh harder.

"Be serious, okay. I need to know if she told you that I'd be at the cafe that day that we met."

I shake my head no, and she side glances me.

"I just happened to see you all there, and I couldn't take my eyes off of you. I still can't." I tell her, and she looks away, trying to hide the fact that my words had an affect on her.

"But you saw me there before right? You'd said that you waited a long time to ask me out?" She asks, and I blink wide-eyed, surprised that she remembered that. I stare at her, and I can see that she's piecing information together in her head. Information I desperately need her to stay in the dark about for awhile.

"I wouldn't say that."

She laughs. "I never get a direct answer with you." She shakes her head disapprovingly. We walk further in silence, and every so often our arms brush, and we glance at each other an laugh. She has to feel that spark of electricity every time we touch. She has to. "Hey, you ever seen an angel?"

"Um, no." Surprised by this sudden subject.

"I only ask because, I don't know, I kind of felt like I had a um..." She trailed off, clearing her throat. "Don't laugh at me, but I think I had a guardian angel or something once."

I try not to laugh, but it comes out anyways, and she shoves me because of my outburst. "I'm serious, okay. There was this guy, I called him 'Ben', don't ask why. He was the object of a story I tried writing months ago. I'll never forget, he had long bronze locks that framed his face, and quite a bit of facial hair if I remember correctly, making it difficult to really see his features, but I could tell he wasn't that old, maybe early-thirties. I wasn't writing much at the time, I'd lost my inspiration to write, but as soon as I looked up and saw him, something clicked in my head. I wanted to write about this guy. I remember writing how he had a long slender nose, and a full crooked mouth with those little lines at the corners. I couldn't see those lines of course but I imagine he had them. Like he would be seriously hot if he just took a shower and shaved or something." She laughs and I don't join in, I just listen trying to figure out where she's going with this. "Anyway, he stood in that corner by the cafe, where people smoke." She lets out another small laugh. Then she stares off ahead of us in thought.

"I remember it like it was yesterday, the first time that I saw him, in his once green jacket. I wrote that day. I literally took out my note pad and started writing about this stranger. I actually wrote that his jacket was faded to a light grey, and that it covered a sweat-stained T-shirt, and an old pair of denim blue jeans that were shredded in the knees." She stopped talking for a moment, seemingly in thought.

"His eyes were so sad, they pulled me in. I just wanted to make his day, you know. I wrote that the guy's eyes were filled with loneliness and sadness as if he had realized a lack of purpose in his life at that moment. And the guy looked at me, and I mean really looked at me, through the glass of the cafe shop. Even from there I could see bags of black and purple rings around his eyes, and I knew he was sleep deprived, and I wanted to help him. I soon realized from the looks he gave me, that he too was trying to better my mood, lift my spirit. He was trying to help me. A total stranger." She shook her head, smiling, remembering the guy, not knowing that I'm him. I'm 'Ben'. "I looked forward to seeing him every day, knowing that he would indeed inspire me to write. Little smiles here and there, little waves, and I think he winked a few times too." She reminisces. "I don't know why I'm telling you this." She laughs nervously.

I shrug. "I'm actually enjoying the story."

She grins, lifting an eyebrow that tells me she doesn't believe a word I'm saying. "Really?" She asks.

"Really." I answer with a small smile, and I catch her eyes flicker to my lips so I lick them, and watch as she bites the corner of her lip, and shift her gaze up slowly from my lips raising both shoulders and eyebrows.

She smiles as she meets my gaze. "Go on." I lean over to speak into her hair, nudging her playfully. She giggles a bit, and my heart skips a beat at the sound. What I wouldn't give to hear that sound everyday of my life?

"I'm convinced he's my angel. He steered me in the right direction, and for months I was happier than ever." She sighs looking away sadly, and I fear what she's going to say next because she looks so sad. I wonder silently why she had a sudden change of mood.

"What happened?" I sincerely want to know what I did to cause her pain. Obviously I'm Ben, but I can't think of what I possibly did to bring this about.

"He left. I haven't seen him. I went out of town to settle things for my wedding dress, and I don't know if Angels get sad or lonely, but I wonder if he thought I'd somehow abandoned him. I mean, I was there everyday, he was there every day, and then one day, I don't know...he just wasn't." She shrugs sadly, then slouches her shoulders, looking down in deep thought.

"As weird as it may sound, I thought about that man when I said yes to Demetri's wedding proposal." She laughs. "I don't know, it sounds crazy but I took it as a sign that good things were to come for me with Demetri. My guardian angel was somehow telling me that Demetri was my future." My heart sinks into my fucking stomach at her words. She took that as a fucking sign? I'm the fucking sign? Me! How fucking ironic?

"Thank you." She says.

I try to come up with a reason for her thanks, but I come up blank. "And what might you be thanking me for?"

She shrugs, and glances over at me. "For being a friend. For listening to me. I know how boring I can be."

"You're far from boring Bella." I stop walking and turn to face her, noting that we are nearing the side of the club. She looks up at me, confused. "Put your shoes on." I tell her, and she looks down at her feet as if she forgot she'd been walking bare foot. She holds on to my arm as I help steady her so that she can put on her shoes.

Once she's done, I hold out my arm for her and she looks at it and giggles. "I'll be sure to thank your mother one day, for raising such a gentleman." She loops her arm as we begin to walk back to our earlier spot.

Speaking of my mother brings on a dark cloud of sadness that I am not prepared to deal with at the moment. Remembering the look on her face. Like I was the fucking monster. Like I was the one that beat her daily within an inch of her life. Like I was the one that couldn't possibly love her, because I was the one that took her love away. She loved that man regardless of all the bullshit he put her through, and the similarity of her and Bella's situation brought a sick feeling to my stomach that seems impossible to shake.

I need a cigarette, and I need it right fucking now.

The look on Bella's face brings me back to reality. "Hey, you okay?" She asks, taking my face in both her hands, looking up at me. "Smile if you are." She jokes, and I can't help but smile. She smiles too, and bites down on her bottom lip as she slowly releases my face. "You have a great smile."

I shrug my shoulders, lift my brows and direct my eyes to the door. "Come on." I take her by the hand, and look up at the bouncer who seems to recognize us this time around, and he lets us through with no problem.

As soon as we walk into the body to body packed club, full of gyrating bodies, Bella grabs my hand and starts dancing as we walk. She looks so beautiful, so happy and carefree, it's infectious.

The loud music thunders through my chest, reminding me that I've never actually been into a club and this experience is already turning out to be a little off putting.

"They're over there." Bella pulls me down to her to shout in my ear. It's hard to hear her over the music, but I manage. We tried to push through the bodies, and Bella seems to struggle more than I do. I grab her hand, pulling her back to my chest as we push, and maneuver through people.

Her smell wafts in my nostrils, that intoxicating smell that makes it so hard to resist the urge to run my nose along her neck. I grip her hips as we walk forward, loving the fact that her little body fits so perfectly in sync with mine as we walk. She continues to dance, and I feel her perfectly round ass moving against my growing erection, and I wonder if she can feel it. Actually I'm pretty sure she can feel it. "Do you drink?" She shouts, pulling me out of my soon to be dirty thoughts, pointing to the bar, and I shake my head no, so we continue forward making it to the group.

My eyes lock on Emmett, and he motions for me to come over so I do. When I reach him, he motions for me to follow him down a hall, and into an office, blocking out the blaring music.

We stand there for a second, looking each other over. It's been so long, and even though I recognize him, he's still a stranger to me.

He folds his arms across his chest, leaning against a mahogany desk that sat in the middle of the room. I look down at his desk, and I feel a pang of jealousy, when I see a picture of him, with his arms around my mom, kissing her cheek. She has a big grin on her face, as does he, as if they are laughing at some joke that I desperately want to be in on.

He sees me looking at it, and he picks it up, holding it out for me to take, and I do. I run my hand down her face, as a lump forms in my throat, and my heart drums in my ears. I didn't realize how much I missed her. I think to myself before saying aloud.

"Edward, we miss you too." Emmett says, and my eyes snap up to look at him, and I'm not sure what expression is on my face, but I feel absolutely torn, broken even. They missed me, and didn't do a god damn thing about it.

"Funny way of showing it." I avert my eyes from him, and place the picture back on the desk.

"Look, Edward, I can stand here and apologize all day-"

"-As you should." I interrupt, widening my stance, feeling indignant.

He grins, shaking his head. "I don't want to fight with you little brother. I never thought I would see you again."

"Obviously."

"Honestly bro, for a few years I fucking resented you for what you did. Mom took the blame for his death, and we struggled with backlash for awhile. Edward I had to testify against my dead father because of you."

"Because of him!" I snap. "Not because of me. It was because he was a weak man that couldn't keep his fucking hands off my mother."

"I understand that now...but back then...I-" He shook his head, his eyes wide and distraught. "I didn't know who to blame. I only knew that my father was dead, and you were the reason."

"I didn't mean to kill him. I just needed to distract him. I needed to get him pissed enough to fight me instead of her. That was the initial plan Emmett. But I just got so fucking pissed, and-"My voice breaks and I'm unable to continue. I don't want to relive those last moments. Not when I have worked hard for so many years attempting to move past it all.

"I'm sorry Em. Fuck!" I growl, spinning away from him. I can't even look at him, because all I see is his father. The man that I killed. My mothers husband. And again I feel like shit.

I feel his hand on my shoulder gripping there in support before speaking. "I'm sorry too Edward. I wish I could turn back time and-" he pauses. "I don't know what I would do differently, but I know I would have tried harder."

I spin back around to face him. "You looked for me?"

"Yeah man. Me and mom did for years but we figured you left the city and we didn't have much after dad died. Apparently he had gambling debts he kept well hidden from us. When he died his small fortune didn't amount to shit. Mom worked two jobs because she wanted to keep the house in hopes that you returned. She was so afraid to move so we had to keep up the payments. When I graduated I couldn't do college. I just couldn't leave her to pay all of the bills on her own. I made her quit one job and I took up two in place." He finishes, and I realize how much of a little shit I really am. Mom loves me, misses me. She worked two jobs to keep a house in hopes that her son would return to a place of familiarity.

Too bad I didn't think I would be welcomed.

I look around the room at a few more pictures, and awards, and realize that Emmett's also a music producer.

"What made you do this?" I ask him, motioning to my finger around the room, hoping that he confirms what I've figured out.

Emmett shoves his hands in his pockets and walks back over to his desk. He looks uncomfortable, and a little awkward. "I produce music too. The club is my baby though. I showcase my artists, and my dj's. This is the sort of shit you were into."

I nod. It's still a passion of mine. All I ever wanted to do was let the pain of my years flow through my music, but I gave up on that dream. I wonder if things were different, had I never did what I did, would I be famous right now? Would Emmett have produced my music and made me a star.

I shake my head ridding myself of the thoughts. I would have never met Bella. I would've never had my chance with her. I would've never fell in love with her. I can't afford to think about the what ifs. All I can do is believe that every thing happens for a reason.

* * *

Rec a few stories for me please! :)


	12. Chapter 12

All thanks to Fran for editting this story. She's an awesome beta! :)

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Edward Pov

Emmett comes over, and I hold out a hand, but he shakes his head and swats my hand away going in for a hug. He pats me on the back, and this is familiar. Strangely it reminds me of when we met for the first time almost eighteen years ago.

I remember it like it was yesterday. Mostly because I thought it was the worst thing to ever happen in life. I was meeting a boy that Esme said I had to be nice to. She sat me down and explained that she wanted me to meet a very nice man and his son, and that soon we'd all be a happy family.

I hated that she just expected me to be okay with the fact that my attention would be split between two strangers now. She expected me to be a good boy, she expected me to be understanding. This is how it was with Esme. Without actually saying certain things, they were just expected. She knew that I would do anything to make her happy, even at eight, all I wanted to do was protect her. That's what daddy wanted. Thats what he made me promise to do before he passed away. He made me swear to always look after my mom and to never let anything bad happen to her.

I'd succeeded for two years, before meeting Emmett and his father without incident. I'd kept my promise. Until that day. The first day that man put his hands on my mom. Or maybe it was just the first time I'd seen him do it. I'm not sure what she did to upset him, but right at the dinner table after much yelling and cursing on his part, he smacked her right across the face. Emmett and I looked at each other in horror at a lost for what to do. I stood quickly, wanting to do something, needing to do something. Even at eight years old I tried to protect her.

I stood there wide eyed, mouth open, and watched as he drug Esme by the hair clear across the kitchen floor. Not caring that she was begging him to stop, pleading with him to let go because she was in pain. At one point she shouted, 'Henry, the kids!' but he didn't care. He was past the point of caring, he was someone else. This wasn't the same man that played football with Emmett and I outside after school. This wasn't the same man that was trying to teach us how to be respectable men with endless lectures on how to be a gentlemen. This wasn't the same man that taught me how to fish, and how to play the piano. This man was...different. Alcohol made him a different kind of man. It made him an evil son of a bitch. He didn't care what he did, or how hurtfully his words were. He threw punches first and apologized later, blaming the alcohol.

At the age of twelve, I begin to see the truth. It wasn't the alcohol that changed him, he literally had to be a sick twisted bastard in the head. He tried to drown Esme one day, but he came to himself and backed away from her as if he had lost control of himself. As if someone else controlled his body, controlled his actions, but then he went right back to it, like there was a switch within him.

I intervened then, knowing for sure that he was going to kill her. "Mom!" I shouted as I watched him dunk her into the bath tub again, his hands at her throat gripping her. "Stop!" I shout at him, and run full force towards him. He looks back at Emmett who just stands there with his eyes wide, unable to do anything. He was fourteen at the time, and although at this point this was something that we commonly encountered, Emmett always looked as if this was his first encounter with violence. I always wondered if he was in shock by what his father had turned into, what his father was capable of. "Get that bastard in the room, Emmett, Now!"

Emmett complies, pulling me into his room, where he stood in front of the door blocking me from exiting. He was always alot bigger than me, and not just because of his age. Even at my age he was huge. There was no way I'd get passed him.

Some days I thought he was helping his dad, and I would get angry and try to fight him. We fought all the time, but this particular time I wanted blood. That son of a bitch was going to kill my mom.

I lunged at Emmett, spearing him at the waist with so much force we flew through the door. Emmetts feet left the ground, and he let out a 'oof'sound, before thudding to the floor. I tagged his face over and over, and that got his dad's attention, as it always does. Emmett was his golden boy, his ticket. Emmett can't be hurt because he was going to make him money one day. He was determined to make Emmett a football star.

"Enough! God damn it, you little shit. Get the fuck off him." He came over pulling me off Emmett who surprisingly didn't throw any punches, and that angered me more. His unwillingness to fight me, eventhough I was unbelievably angry only pissed me off.

I looked over into the bathroom to see my mom crawl on her hands and knees out of the tub, drenched in water, gasping for air. She fell to the tile floor on her back, stretched out, looking over at me with eyes that begged me to be understanding. How could I be? How could she accept this, allow this? What did she get out of it? Love? Was it that strong? My dad loved her like crazy and he never layed a hand on her, yet here she was, being strangled and begging for her life.

"Mom." I rushed over to her as she choked and coughed up water. I turned her to her side, trying to help her breath.

With tearfilled eyes she told me something that I regret to this day. "Go to your room, and forget about this." She choked out weakly, but it was a command, and I wouldn't dare disobey her. When I got to my room I'd heard him bound back up the stairs to her, after dealing with Emmett. He wasn't finished.

My mother was so badly beaten that day, I had to stay home from school for four days, helping her around the house because she could barely move from all the aches and pain, and she refused to go to the hospital, claiming she didn't want to spend my thirteenth birthday in the hospital. I didn't make her go to the hospital but I remember feeling overwhelmingly angry and guilty, and I wanted to place blame, but it always fell on my shoulders.

I regretted going to my room, and I blamed myself for how badly she was hurt. My dad's words rung in my ears over and over and that day I vowed, if that man ever put his hands on my mother again, I would kill him.

And I did. And now, just as Emmett did after every disagreement we had as kids, every argument, he was closing the gap. Even after all these years he never changed.

"I'm sorry Edward. I wish I could make up for lost time, I swear I do." He pulled back to look at me, his face showed sincerity. He pats my chest with the back of his hand. "You will always be my little brother."

I nod, and he pulls away with a smile that I'm unable to return. "We have so much to talk about. Let's meet for lunch tomorrow." He pulls out his phone, and hands it to me. "Your number." He nods his head to the phone.

I dial my number with his phone, calling my phone. When my phone rings in my pocket I quickly hang it up. "I'm here on a date, otherwise I swear I would spend the entire night catching up."

"- I get it." I tell him nodding and he pats my back, putting his arm around my shoulder leading me out of his office.

"Let's get some drinks in you." He insists as we enter the VIP section. I decline and he bellows out in laughter. "You don't drink." I lift one shoulder. Seeing as I saw his dad drink and batter my mother daily for years, I'm pretty sure that little experience is ruined for me.

"Drinks on me." He shouts like he's the king of the world, and the VIP section errupts in cheers and hoots, even Bella joins in, and I find myself trying to hold back jealousy.

I look over at Bella with her hands in the air, dancing to the music and realize she's had quite a few drinks already. She catches me staring at her, and she drunkenly winks, her mouth wide open and I laugh at her, because it's quite cute and amusing.

She laughs too, tossing her head back in this adorable carefree way. It was refreshing because she isn't doing it for my benefit or to please me, this is just who she is. Granted, when she's drunk she has less inhibition than when she's sober, either way she's showing me a different side of her right now and I'd be lying if I said I didn't love it.

I crook my finger at her, telling her to come here, and she gives me a sexy look, biting the corner of her mouth, before she stands and walks over to me, sitting square on my lap.

I instinctively wrap my arms around her waist, and nuzzle my nose in her hair, trying to hide from Alice and Rose' stare. "You're drunk." I groan into her ear and she giggles and whines as she pulls away, letting me know not to do that because it tickles.

She looks back at me and I lick my lips, wanting so badly to lean up and kiss her, so I do. She doesn't pull away and I take that as a sign to continue. I grip the back of her head, and deepen the kiss and I moan when she sucks on my tongue. She then does something that I wasn't expecting.

"Shit." I hiss, because she feels so fucking good. She's grinding her ass against my growing erection, along to the beat of the music and I am enjoying it, but god damn she's got me hard as a fucking rock. I have a need so deep in me, so urgent that I almost lift her dress and bury myself deep in her pussy as I've often dreamt about.

I grip her hair in my right hand pulling her back so that her head turns to the side to look at me. I whisper in her ear exactly whats on my mind, not able to hold back any longer.

"That little move will get you fucked." I tell her, and I hear her take in a sharp breath and turn her head more to get a better look at her.

"So do it." She taunts, and my eyes widen. She can't mean that.

"Bella, you're drunk."

"I'm not. I've only had a few shots. I just..." She looks down, debating something and bites the corner of her lip, which is something that causes my dick to twitch painfully in my fucking pants. I reach up and pull her lip from between her teeth and her mouth opens as her eyes snap to mine and when I lick my lips, she attacks me.

Full on kissing, and grinding, and not caring who the fuck was around us. With my hand in her hair again, I maneuver her side ways in my lap, pulling her face closer to mine. I bite her bottom lip, the very same lip that was between her teeth just seconds ago, because fuck, she made it look so damn enticing. I suck it into my mouth, and then shove my tongue through her parted lips, loving her taste. She has a strong alcohol taste, and something else that lingeres and although I hate alcohol, I find the taste on her tongue intoxicating.

"Mmm" She moans, and I feel her shiver in my hands, and not because she's cold.

"Fuck, I want you." I pull back looking between her eyes, to see if this is indeed something that she wants. I have to hear her say the words. "Tell me that you want me." I was desperately in need and I'm sure it showed in my voice.

I wanted to worship her body, learn every curve, and lick every bit of her, I want to make slow passionate love to her, and show her exactly how I feel. But that can wait. I have this pent up frustration within me from her indecision, and constant teasing, and her little black dress and fuck me heels. I need to be inside of her now.

She looks between my eyes, and for the life of me, I can't seem to figure out what she's looking for. She all of a sudden looks very sober, and I know the exact moment that I lost her. All because of my need to touch her.

I cup her face, and run my thumb against her cheek tenderly, and she stiffens. Thats when I lose her. She looks away and stands, looking everywhere but at me.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me." She tries to laugh it off, but when she looks at the look on my face, she stops short. I'm pretty fucking frustrated, borderline pissed.

I watch her, trying to calm down, staring intensely and she squrims under my fiery gaze.

Luckily Alice saves her, grabbing her hand and tugging her towards the dance floor. Bella's eyes stay on me as she backs away with her hand in Alice's clutches.

I watch them dance, and soon after Rose joins them, I feel Jasper and Emmett next to me with drinks in their hand. I turn my gaze towards them and tip my head towards Jasper, realizing that I hadn't spoke to my ex boss.

"Jasper."

He tips his head as well, and surprisingly I don't see a hint of resentment in his eyes. I left him high and dry without notice, as he's been really cool about it.

"So" He begins, lifting a beer to his lips. "You and Bella..." He asks, tipping his beer bottle towards Bella who momentarily distracts me with the way her body is moving to an upbeat mashup song that I've never heard. It's really good though. I make a note to look it up when I get home.

I look back over at Jasper, not having even the slightest clue how to answer so I shrug nonchalantly. "She's engaged"

He lets out a mock laugh, and gives me a look that tells me he knows more than I think he does. "Hasn't stopped you."

"Yea, I've seen the way you look at her" Emmett pipes in and it takes everything out of me not to tell him how far he can shove his opinion up his ass because he doesn't know a god damn thing about me or Bella.

I keep a neutral facial expression, and try not to even look his way as I speak. "We're friends." I wish we were more, i think, but don't voice it.

They laugh and I just look at them like they are as crazy as they sound right now, laughing at me as if I'm blind or stupid. I know how it looks, but sadly, Bella and I have been the most complicated thing about my life...ever. My life has been fully of issues, full of fate's bad dealings, but this time, I think I'll be the most heartbroken I've ever been in life. It was somewhat okay when I didn't know her, when she was simply an infatuation, an obsession. Now that I know her I've fallen so deep in love with her I can't think straight.

All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye I see Bella rush out the club doors with a phone glued to her ear. I stand quickly going after her.

The cold air hits me reminding me that she barely has on fucking clothes, and it pisses me off. Why would she come outside?

"Bella" I shout and she turns around quickly shooting dagers at me, before turning back to speak into the phone.

She pushes her hair out of her face, and holds her palm against her forehead. She seems stressed about something. I walk up close to her, and I can't hear what she's saying, nor what the other person is saying because the closer I get the farther she walks, but I can tell that she's sad about something.

All of a sudden she turns back to face me quickly with tears streaming down her face. "Stay away from me, Edward."

Thank you for reading! :)


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Edward Pov

"Edward you have to stay away from me." She looks devastated, and I can't seem to figure out why. Then her eyes zone out and fear crosses her facial expressions. "Oh God." She covers her mouth, and I become on full alert.

"What happened?" I approach her slowly and with caution.

"He's going to hurt you. Please just stay away from me. I couldn't live with myself if something happened to you." She cries and I walk towards her not able to stand back and watch her cry. I pull her into my arms, and she grips onto my arms firmly, pulling me closer, needing the support.

"Was that him? Demetri?" I ask her, needing to fix her problem. I hate seeing her like this. She's trembling in my arms, and I want to destroy the person that did this to her.

"Yes. Demetri. He heard you, and he-" She pauses.

I pull back to look at her. "Calm down Bella. Breathe. You're okay." She takes a deep breath.

"I have to get you home, I have to-" She starts pushing me towards the car in a panic but I stop her. She breathes out slowly, almost in disbelief and her tears stop. I stand there holding her, frozen in place, confused. Does she think I'm afraid of Demetri?

"Edward, he's going to hurt you. He warned me that he'd hurt you..." She paused, catching her breath and she looks up me sadly. "He told me I forced his hand."

"I'm not going anywhere." I pull her to my chest, relieved that he hadn't threatened her, only me, but I'm so fucking angry beyond all belief because he'd hurt her. "Come on, let's go back in."

"No!" She stopped me, and I looked down at her sad face. "I want to go," She whispers.

I nod, and drop my arm to reach for her hand. I walk her to her car. "Are you okay to drive?" I ask and she nods. I sigh in relief; I don't want to have to tell her that I don't know how to drive.

I open the door and she slides in. I take a minute to look down at her as she puts on her seatbelt. I lean down with one hand on the roof of the car to get eye level with her.

"It's going to be okay Bella." I tell her, and I see her lips tremble as if she wants to cry, but she's holding it back, staying strong. She nods, and turns to face the front of the car. I shut her door and run around to hop in the passenger side.

We drive in silence for a while before I hear Bella sniffle, and I watch her face unable to control how tight my chest feels at the sight. I didn't want her to marry that asshole, but I didn't want her to be in pain either.

"Bella," I whisper when we pull up to Carlisle's home.

"Can we just not..." She sniffles, and shakes her head vigorously. "I don't want to talk about it, or about him. He isn't the man I thought he was." She grips the steering wheel staring straight ahead.

"You can talk to me, Bella." I tell her, and I hear her sniff and let out a mock laugh.

"Right? I can talk to you about him? Really!" She finally looks at me and I see pain, confusion, disbelief, all over her face.

"You can. I'm your friend."

"If you were just my friend, he wouldn't feel so threatened." She spits out, and I'm taken aback by her tone. When I don't speak, she scuffs again and looks away.

"You know what my dad used to say to me?" I begin, and she looks into my eyes waiting for me to continue. "I mean, he died when I was a kid, but I'd always hear him say that the one you love will add to your happiness, not take it away. He loved my mother so fiercely, even at five, I knew that I would never settle for anything less. So, if he adds to your happiness, Bella, then you should want it to work, otherwise, it's best to walk away, or you'll both be unhappy forever."

She ponders my words, staring at the steering wheel, thinking. "He's all I know. He's taken such good care of me." I sit there waiting for her to say more because the thought of getting out of this car and leaving her here is painful. I need to make this better for her. "My dad died just a few weeks after I'd met Demetri. I was so skeptical about dating him." She paused remembering something, then she looked over at me. "I didn't want to date, plus he's Alice's cousin, and it just didn't seem right." She shrugs. "But then my dad died, and he was there for me. He really showed me how much he cared. From then on, he's done everything for me, and I mean everything. How will I be able to live on my own?"

"It can't be healthy living like that. Being dependent on someone." I try not to sound like I'm judging or looking down on her, l know how that feels so I try to keep it out of my voice. She doesn't look or sound offended. She just seems disappointed in herself.

"I know. I know better than anyone. The man thinks for me half the time, of course, that's not healthy. But it's all I know."

"This will surely give you time to figure out what's best for you. To be honest, I don't think it's him." I tell her honestly. I wonder if she knows he's a cheater as well as a liar, among all of the other shit he's into, like beating her when he feels like it.

"Of course not. You're bias." I finally get a smile out of her, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"I'm fair. I wouldn't just say it for my benefit. I don't think he's a good guy."

"Maybe not." We fall silent, and I can tell that she's wondering why I'm still in the car.

"We never talk about us, Bella." I begin and out of the corner of my eye, I see her flinch.

"You mean when I cheat?"

I nod in understanding. "We have to talk about it, though, Bella. Especially what happened tonight."

"What is there to say?" She sighs. "I don't know what I'm doing."

I sigh heavily, realizing it's probably way too soon to have this conversation. She needs time to cool down from her argument with Demetri.

I turn to face her and I lift her chin to look at me. "I won't pressure you, but you need to know that I want a relationship with you, and I just hope you'll give us a chance one day."

She doesn't say anything, she just stares at me. I lean forward and I peck her sexy lips. I'll never get enough of her lips.

"I'll see you at the cafe."

She slowly nods watching as I open the door to get out of the car. I shove my hands in my pockets and watch her drive away, feeling my heart leave along with her.

Two days pass before I'm able to meet Bella, Alice, and Rose at Leah's cafe. I walk up to them as usual and I'm met with all smiles. There's a woman with them today that I've seen in the past and I'm pretty sure that she's Bella's friend Leah.

"Ladies." I greet everyone as I sit next to Bella, drapping my arm behind her chair. I miss her so fucking much. It's as if we weren't together just two days ago.

Today I woke up in hopes of asking Bella out. It's time she let a real man treat her the way she deserves to be treated.

She still looks sad, but much better than she looked that night, which makes me extremely grateful for whoever was able to cheer her up.

"Fuck, you're hot! Hi, I'm-I'm Leah." She pulls my attention away from Bella, to accept the hand she held out across the table. "I mean Bella, said you were hot, but that's clearly an understatement."

I smile at her compliment, happy that Bella talked about me.

I sit back in my seat, again placing my arm around Bella.

"Thank you," I tell her.

"No. Thank you." She winks, and Alice and Rose snicker while Bella shakes her head.

"Bella, don't forget about the tasting this week." Rose reminds Bella and she nods, picking up her cup to take a drink.

"Tasting for what?" I ask, curiosity getting the best of me. Everyone at the table looks at me as if I'm an idiot. Then Alice's eyes soften and she sighs before replying.

"The wedding," She says giving me a sympathetic look. I just talked to her last night about how I had hope for things moving forward with Bella and now this?

"Don't look too happy." Leah said sarcastically, and Bella purposely avoids eye contact with me.

"You took him back?" I try not to convey how angry I am at hearing this news, but I am. I'm so unbelievably pissed.

"We never broke up and he apologized for how he spoke to me."

"That's all it took?" I ask her furious that she does not see my point.

"He was upset." She shrugs. She fucking shrugs, and that's my breaking point.

I nod, understanding how this goes. My mother stayed with an asshole like this for years. One that has a hold so tight the woman can't see straight.

I don't want that for her.

I shake my head and stand, ignoring every eye on me but Bella's. "They weren't just words and next time it may go further."

"Edward-" Alice says in a chastising tone, further pissing me off.

"I know how this works Bella. I don't want that for you." And with that, I leave, without a glance back at anyone.

Bella Pov

Four days pass without seeing or hearing from Edward, and it's taking a toll on me mentally. I tried to busy myself with wedding stuff, but it's hard when my mind is so fully on him. My body physically aches for his touch, and I know it's wrong but I want him. I want things with him that I know I shouldn't and not just because of circumstance, but because I barely know him. Somehow, my mind is aware of that, but other parts of me don't seem to care. I want him and I know he wants me. It's written all over his face every time he sees me. I can see the fire in his eyes when he looks at me. I miss that look among others. I miss him.

While I'm tasting food, trying to pick what I want for my wedding reception, my mind only drifts to Edward and I silently wonder what he's doing.

"Bella, what do you think?" I hear Rose ask from beside me. I barely register her words, because I seriously have Edward on the brain, and I have no idea why. Why do I miss him so much? Why is he affecting me so much?

How am I supposed to focus on choosing a dish right now?

I look down at the practically untouched plate. The prawns are good.

"Bella?" Rose calls, snapping her fingers at me. "You're usually not into this wedding stuff but I figured with food you'd be different." She lets out a laugh. I ignore her, thinking of Edward and how I'd like to cook for him. I've never even cooked for Demetri, ever, yet here I am-

"Bella." Rose calls, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I shout more forceful than I meant to. I look up at Rosalie's face and I instantly regret yelling at her. I never raise my voice. "I'm sorry. I'm a little stressed."

I quickly stand grabbing my purse, thinking that I have had enough. I need to see him, and I need to see him now. I know that I'm playing with fire but fuck, I don't know how else to calm this storm raging inside of me. This pull inside of me, this ache in my chest, it can only be satisfied by one thing... one person. Edward.

Bella Pov

"What are you-" Rose steps back away from me with her arms outstretched in disbelief. "Bella"

"Prawns. Get the prawns, and whatever else you think I'll like. I'm sorry Rose. I have to go."

"You're leaving?"

I quickly exit without turning back to her to answer. I have to see him.

Almost an hour later, I knock on the door to Carlisle's home, hoping Edward answers and not Carlisle.

To my delight, he does, swinging the door open just as he'd done last week. He stands there with a big smile on his face, and a twinkle in his eye. I may have imagined it, but I think I see him rub his chest through his shirt, but I don't mention it. He looks as if he's seeing me for the first time, flashing a killer smile that lights up my surroundings. He's so beautiful and I swear he's gotten a lot buffer since the day I met him. A little over a month ago, he was a bit thin as if he didn't eat much. But now, his muscles are toned and it's deliciously visible through his shirt. I can't help but lick my lips at the sight of him. Then he has this incredibly sexy scruffy look working for him. I could take him right now.

Lust fills my senses, heightening my awareness of him and the look he gives me sends shivers down my spine. The hair on the back of my neck to raise and my body waits in anticipation of his touch. I push Demetri to the back of my mind, and stare at the magnificent specimen standing before me. He looks even more fuckable today than he did a few nights ago, and God the distance between us only makes me ache for him more.

His eyes then scan down my body in appreciation and the look on his face causes a flutter in my stomach. I knew that I missed him, but fuck; I almost hug him, needing some physical contact to help soothe the ache in my chest from not seeing him for a few days. I think better of it, thinking it would probably make things worse. No matter how I spin this in a sad attempt to make myself feel better, I know this is wrong. I hear the tiny voice screaming at me to run, that this is dangerous, but I don't listen to that voice. I listen to the one telling me that he is worth the risk that we are taking.

It's crazy how my brain spins things, but fuck if I don't want this man more than I want my next breath. It's so unbearably hard to stay away from him, and I'm tired of trying. Tired of wrecking my brain for other alternatives, knowing that staying away is an option that I refuse to pay attention to.

"Hi," I whisper nervously, needing to break the silence.

"Hi," He replies, his smile never falters. He steps forward. "Come in." He grabs my hand, pulling me into the house; his eyes never leave mine as I enter slowly.

"Where have you been?" I ask him as we walk towards his room. My body buzzes from being near him and I love the feeling.

"You missed me." He teases me smugly and I snort even though it's not far from the truth. I'm not going to tell him that, though.

"No." I reply and he laughs, opening the door and pulling me into his room.

"You don't have to admit it. I missed your pretty face too." He winks and I blush at being caught, and also at his words. He missed me.

I sit down on his bed and remove my jacket, this time, I'm more comfortable being near him.

"We should talk." I tell him and he nods, looking down at my hand. He takes my hand in his, playing with my fingers as he speaks.

"Yea, I know. Seems every time we talk you don't listen, so I stopped trying." The corner of his mouth turns up into a smirk but he doesn't look up from my hand.

I sigh heavily, thinking that I should broach how I've been feeling.

"Edward." I start only to be interrupted.

"Spend the day with me," He asks and my eyes widen in surprise at his question.

"Today?" I ask in a whisper as if it's a secret, and he nods with a smile but looks so hopeful. He stares at me, through me, willing me to say yes. His eyes are piercing green orbs searching my big brown ones, and I feel him slightly squeeze my hand as he leans closer towards me. He glances at my lips and I know for sure that he's about to kiss me. My heart speeds up at the thought. I want him to kiss me, God; I want him to kiss me hard. I want all of my dreams and fantasy to come true, and I know that is basically the reason that I came here but...the more I think about it, the more scared I become. What if Demetri finds out? Edwards's blood would be on my hands if anything ever happened to him because of me. Because of my selfishness. Because I couldn't control what I felt for another man. A man that surely isn't mine to want.

As much as I fucking want it, and boy do I want it, he can't kiss me. Regardless of these feelings that I'm coming to terms with, I have to pull away.

"Stop." I breathe, and of course, Edward's a gentleman so he stops moving closer, but I feel his breath wash across my face. That's just how close he is to me. He's just a breath away. His lips are slightly parted, and his breath is coming quickly. I somehow forget how to breathe. I just sit there, thinking, wishing things were different, hoping I have the strength to pull completely away before we make a mistake.

"I'm engaged." I whisper and I look up to see his crooked smile that I've come to love, it gets me every time. He lets out a small huff of a laugh before pulling back slightly to look at me.

He lifts a shoulder in a shrug, with that same smile in place, and a sly look on his face. "I'm not."

I roll my eyes and I can't help but laugh. I shove at his chest playfully and he grabs my hand at his chest and holds it there, staring at me, all of a sudden too serious. He bends his head down, looking up at me through his lashes, and he slowly licks his lips before taking his bottom lip into his mouth through his teeth, before slowly releasing it. I look away from him knowing that if he keeps looking at me like that, I'm going to beg him to make me come.

He tugs my hand that's still planted with my palm against his chest and I look back at him to see him giving me another sexy look, and fuck I'm putty in his hands. He ducks his head down slightly to catch my gaze, looking up at me with his eyebrows low. He's trying to get a read on me, but I can't let him. I can't let him strip me bare before him. I'll cave, I just know I will. I'll get exactly what I came here for.

"I'm getting married," I whisper, almost unable to find my voice as I stare at his sexy face.

He licks his lips and pulls my hand again, effectively pulling me til we're nose to nose. My breath hitches in my throat, and my heart speeds up. My body sings happily from getting what it's been craving. God, his touch is electrifying, my body is scorching hot, and ready to open for him in whatever way he wants.

"I don't care." He says in a husky voice, and I'm definitely not immune to the sound. That lust filled voice that challenges me to say no.

I'm so close to him and he has my hand in his between us, and a tremor runs through my body, and I'm filled with adrenaline when he cups my face. The feel of his hand on my face sends shots of electricity straight to my core. His singular touch sends a rush through me, and I'm lit. His fingertips feel like fire, as they trail down my jaw to my neck. He's making me lose my mind.

"I'm losing my mind, Edward." I stammer over my words, they come out choppy between labored breaths. He ignores my comment without a second thought.

"Come here." He says lowly, so low I almost don't hear it, and he pulls me again until I'm almost in his lap.

"We can't." I have to get away from him because I am so close to giving in. Edward has me so unbelievably turned on and I know I'm a damp mess between my legs. He brings the hand he's been holding between us, up and around his neck as he begins to trail kisses up my arm, and oh god, his hot wet kisses are exquisite.

"Stop talking," He says with a deep throaty groan against my skin, not listening to a word that I'm saying. He stops his assault, and looks up at me, pinning me where I sit, unable to move. I'm aware that my arm is still around his neck, but I can't move, and after a second of deliberation, I realize that I don't want to. "Your lips say one thing." He runs the pad of his thumb across my lower lip. Then ever so slowly, he runs his hand down my arm leaving a trail of goosebumps. His hand ends up at my waist, pulling me how he wants me. "But your body." He groans, and his eyes devour my body. I hear his voice thick and dripping with sex and unspoken implications. He leans forward, brushing his lips against my ear. "You want me." He speaks into my ear and I quiver as I am overtaken by lust, unable to put up much of a fight anymore. He then kisses right under my ear, moving down to plant a slow kiss on my jaw, then my shoulder.

I want to protest, but words fail me. My own brain fails me. "I. Cant. Breathe."

The corner of his mouth twitches into another one of those delicious smiles and I want to fucking jump his bones. Stop looking at me like that!

"I've got you."

And with those words hanging in the air, I fight the impulse just to throw myself at him with my last bit of self-control. He kisses the corner of my mouth slowly and my breath hitches from the feeling of the unexpected kiss.

"Why did you come here?" He asks all of a sudden and I'm stunned because honestly I can't remember why. I mean, I know why, I just, I can't tell him that I came here just for this very reason, and now I'm having second thoughts. "You want something from me."

"No." I breathe out, and hold my breath as he places a kiss on my lips, just one, that leaves me breathless.

"The truth." He pulls back to search my eyes and with that look I would give him any and everything that he wants. He tilts his head to the side with his eyebrows low trying to read me.

"I just-" I look around for something that could help me. I can't help myself when he looks at me with those green eyes and smiles at me with that crooked smile, and those delicious lips and when he has his hands on me. God help me! I don't stand a chance.

"Bella." He whispers like a prayer and he brings his face close, running his nose down my cheek and my words catch in my throat. The way he says my name, it's a soft caress of his tongue, combined with his hands on me, combined with the tension in the room; I lose it.

"You're driving me insane." I involuntarily shake in his arms and I slightly tilt my head back with closed eyes feeling so very turned on by him and confused, and just...out of my fucking mind. I'm not functioning properly, and he knows it. He knows that he's wearing me down.

I'm so flustered and turned on, and so many other unidentifiable things. I've never felt like this before. It's scary. Plus I feel guilty for cheating on Demetri. No one deserves to be cheated on. No one...

Suddenly, guilt hits me with so much force at that moment and I stand, forcing him to stand upright.

"I can't do this to him, Edward," I say with conviction, hoping that he gets the point to stop pursuing me. It's not his fault, though. It's mine. I don't have the strength to stay away from him, or fight these feelings, or stop his advances. He makes me weak in my knees. He takes me away into a cloud with no chance of coming down. I'm fucking hooked on him. Obsessed even. His body calls to mine and I come willingly, and without hesitation.

Boy am I in trouble!

Edward Pov

This woman, this woman! She will be the death of me I'm sure. It took everything in me to pull away from her sexy little body but I had to do it.

I needed to regain control of the situation at hand. I need her to pick me. I know it's a long shot but I plan to keep working her, wear her down, and eventually I plan to take her. She will be mine.

After the week that I've had with Carlisle, I've been filled with newfound determination. I wanted Bella, not only in my bed but all of her. I wanted her heart, mind, and body. I wanted her to want me in the same ways, in spite of her impending marriage.

In my opinion, Demetri is not fucking good enough for her. From what I've learned in the past months, he is not well-liked by those who know him, and most hate him. He's a fucking asshole, and if it weren't for Bella's apparent 'feelings' for him, I'd fuck him up every chance I could. But Bella wouldn't like that. She thinks she's in love with the bastard. I think she's confused, or maybe brainwashed is more accurate. Demetri has a hold on her and I'm determined to shake away his grasp on my girl.

Bella is fucking adorable; I don't stand a chance at resisting her. Especially when she keeps coming to me just asking to be fucked. I won't fuck her though, not at first. I want to make slow passionate love to her, to show her how it feels to be loved by a man. I want her more than I want to breathe.

I'm not quite a religious man, but I woke up this morning with one singular thought, 'God, I need to see her.' Call it chance, coincidence, divine intervention, whatever you may, but less than an hour later guess who knocks on the fucking door? My girl. My Bella. I must have done something to please the man upstairs.

I know that I shouldn't be happy about breaking up a relationship, but put yourself in my shoes for a minute. I loved her before I even knew that she was engaged. Why the hell should I step back and let her make possibly the biggest mistake of her life? Why should we both suffer, when we have what the other wants and needs?

I was going to let her go when I thought I had nothing to offer. Before Carlisle offered me a job, before she came here with her fucking face bruised up, before I realized that it was futile to hold this attraction at bay. I'm bursting at the seams with love for her, and I needed to make it clear.

This is wrong, I know I'm going to be judged harshly for stealing her away, but I really can't find it in me to care. I can't , scratch that, I won't live without her. Believe me, there is no fucking doubt that in the next two weeks she'll be mine and this sham of a wedding will be called off.

I know that Bella is going to doubt herself, and in turn, she'll doubt me because to her a few weeks of knowing me doesn't compare to the almost two years that she spent with Demetri. I also know that Bella is worried about public scrutiny.

I told her that she shouldn't give a rat's ass what people think of her. She's an amazing woman, and if they can't see past her decisions to the woman beneath, they don't deserve to know her.

It took years of being stared at in disgust and being constantly judged by people on the street that have no clue what I've been through, before I learned not to care. I simply do not give a fuck. Not one fuck, two fuck, red fuck, blue fuck. People's opinions are just that, opinions. I can choose to let them constantly control me, or I can do what I've done pretty much my entire life. Ignore them.

When I was young, I'd go to the public library all stinky from weeks without a decent shower, with unkempt hair, and tattered clothing. I'd get stares, and I'd hear the murmurs, and I'd hear the laughs, and endure the endless pointing, and watch as people scrunched their face up obviously over reacting to my stench, but I ignored it. I sat in my little corner with piles and piles of fucking books, and that was my form of learning.

I did endless research on computers, just filling my brain with knowledge that I wouldn't otherwise get if I just sat in the street corner all day with my friends, singing and beating on dumpsters as entertainment. It was fun, but it had no substance. Before my biological dad died, he drilled in my head that knowledge is power, and by God, I've lived by that for so many years and found it to be true.

Now the only person that I consider family is Carlisle and he is giving me just that. I'm soaking up as much as I can, eager to not only impress him but prove that I can do it. Prove that I can do something with my life and that I'm deserving of Bella. I want to be able to provide for her, give her everything she's ever wanted, give her the world. At any cost, this homeless man is going to work hard. Not only to become deserving of her, but be deserving of her heart.

I know that Carlisle's warnings are coming from a good place, yet I can't find it in me to care. I simply don't care that they're engaged. Until they tie the knot, all I see is oppurtunity. Opportunity to make her love me so deeply and irrevocably, without boundaries, and without doubt.

"Are you ready?" She asked me and I nod. She takes a deep calming breath, closing her eyes to compose herself. "Did I mention I'm not much of a poet?" She tilts her head to the side and I can see her nerves getting the best of her.

I chuckle at her and lean forward in my seat, looking dead into her eyes. "I'm sure whatever you have there will be great." I point down to the notepad that I'd bought for her, hoping that when we came back to Starbucks she'd be able to find inspiration to write. She told me that she had the worst case of writers block, and it's lasted since her 'angel' left her. It was so bad that even when she got ideas, she was sure they sucked and never wrote them down. I was determined to get her back to her first love. I wanted her to write again.

"I couldn't do it yesterday, what makes you think today is any different." She folds her arms across her chest sitting back, once again doubting her ability to write.

I take both of her hands in mine, rubbing the pad of my thumbs in circles over her soft skin in reassurance.

"Today is different because you took a step. No scratch that, you took a leap. You wrote down actual words, baby." I smile teasingly and she returns my smile, before slowly nodding her head. I remember each time we've come here. How she sat here for hours and doodled, and I just watched her patiently waiting for words to form in her pretty little head. "Stop doubting your ability. Even if it sucks, which it won't, it's something to be proud of, because it's something unique. Something only you could write."

"How are you so wise?" She laughs, and I shake my head at her disapprovingly, and I roughly squeeze both of her thighs, catching her off guard. I pull her towards me with my hands still planted firmly on her plump thighs.

"Stop stalling, Miss Swan." I release her and she shoves me away, pushing my chest. I seductively lick my lips, staring at her in that way that gets me whatever I want from her.

"I'm not stalling... I'm thinking." She taps her jaw, and looks away thoughtfully.

"Well, while you're thinking so hard, go ahead and do me a favor." I slap both of her thighs with a plop of my hands. "I want you to think of your life Bella. Think of how you see yourself in ten years. Are you happy? Are you happy with him?"

She ponders my statement for a second. "Edward..."

"Bella..." I mock her and watch as she rolls her eyes.

"What does that have to do with my writing?"

"Just-" I breathe, growing irate. "Answer the fucking question."

"Don't curse at me." She makes a face wrinkling her nose and I swear it makes me love her sexy little ass so much more.

"Answer me, baby," I say in a much softer tone.

She looks heavenward and blows out a heavy breath. "Honestly Edward, I don't know." She shakes her head. "And that scares me because I should be able to clearly see my life with him." she gives me a meaningful look. "The thing is... lately I've been seeing someone else in those visions."

This instantly causes me to perk up. Then she speaks again, crushing my hopes. "I'm scared of this someone."

Nodding in understanding, I prove to her that I know what she's going through, but she has to give it a try.

"You owe it to yourself to give us a try, though. You can't tell me that you don't feel this." I grab her hand and place it over my heart. "I would tattoo your name here if it gave you any inclination as to how strongly I feel for you. You're the only woman that ever made my heart beat like this. The only woman to own me so completely."

She looks down and I watch a tear roll down her cheek. "You love me?" Her voice is shaky, and there's no denying that she's crying.

"With my whole heart."

She gasps and then a sob bursts from her lips. With her free hand, she covers her mouth, her shoulders shake uncontrollably.

With a sob wracking through her body, she slowly lifts her head to meet my gaze. She sucks in a shaky breath and nods her head.

"I love you too."

* * *

So... I'm just going to wait and see how many people question Bella's declaration. I'm actually a little scared to read the reviews.

Thank you Fran for all your hard work or this story. You're a big big help and I couldn't do this without you :)


	14. Chapter 14

Thank you so much Fran for working your magic on my story. I am forever grateful you agreed to help me.

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

* * *

Chapter 14:

Edward Pov

Bella and I have been spending every morning together for the past week. We somehow have fallen into a routine where we meet at Starbucks near Carlisle's instead of the usual spot at Leah's cafe.

We sit and talk for hours about everything, and it just feels good to be with her, near her, even if we aren't touching. We usually part ways a little before noon, and sometimes we meet again later in the day. Today Carlisle spent the afternoon drilling numbers and plans into my head until **I** was ready to explode. I knew that only one person could help me unwind, and relax. My Bella. So I texted her.

Busy? -E

Out with Alice. What's up? -B

I need to see you. –E

I can get away. Leaving now. -B

After our confession of love, Bella promised to tell Demetri but asked me to be patient with her. It's been a week and still she hasn't broken things off with him. I am learning a great deal about patience dealing with the love of my life. It's only a matter of time before she honors her promise I'm sure of it.

It seems as though she's afraid of Demetri and although I hate that fact, I also understand she is treating this with a certain level of sensitivity. Alice is her best friend and she has grown to love the Cullen family, so I understand. However, I will not go another week without this being handled. I need Demetri to know and understand that she belongs to me.

I can get away. Leaving now. -B

When she arrived at Carlisle's home, I was already standing outside near the end of the driveway smoking a cigarette. Still she honked at me and waved with a huge grin on her face as if I wouldn't recognize the car I have now seen a million times.

Once inside the car, she stares at me for a long time before speaking.

"What?" I ask, wondering why her eyes are squinting at me.

"Do you normally grow your beard so long..."

"I guess you don't like it." I rub my chinful of hair. It's not quite a beard but give it a few weeks and it will be.

Her hand reaches up and into my hair. "No, no, no ... I promise I'm loving the beard, it's just your hair. It's so shaggy. You're looking a bit hippie-ish. I'm wondering if this combination is an all the time thing or are you trying something new?"

"I haven't decided what I'll do. It's just hair, baby." I wink at her.

"Yeah, I know. You're so rugged and manly, and..." She leans closer and bites down on her bottom lip looking down at my lips "... sexy." Her eyes snap to mine and they are smoldering. She has never looked at me with such unbridled lust. Her eyes burn through me almost becoming my undoing.

"Don't look at me like that Bella. That look comes with consequences."

"I'm sorry ... I just didn't expect you to look so different each day." She continues to stare, her eyes search around my face trying to make the connection that I'm striving for.

"Different is good..." I stare back at her and lick my lips trying to reign in my very vivid and lustful thoughts.

"A little longer and your hair can go in a nice little ponytail like mine." She grins in a teasing manner and tilts her head to the side in a very girlie way as she twirls her ponytail in between her fingers.

I can't help the widening of my smile as I watch her. I love when she's just being herself, open and free, holding nothing back from me. When she sees that I am staring at her she looks away staring at the steering wheel nervously.

"The hair puts a few years on you but it's incredibly sexy." She refuses to look my way and I open my mouth to ask her to look at me but I think better of it. She is probably keeping her eyes downcast for a reason. She knows what a certain look does to me.

"Thank you. Now, let's go, baby. I want you to write for me."

"When are you going to write for me?" She asks, finally looking up from the wheel.

"I write songs, love. Not poetry."

"Same thing, _love_." She mocks me, making a face. Then she nudges me. "Seriously when? I want you to write me something."

Nervously I shift in my seat before replying, "I'm –ah– working on it." I clear my throat and lower my brows staring intensely into her eyes.

She bites down on her bottom lip and moves closer to me with a satisfied grin on her face. My vague answer seemingly pleased her.

"When can I hear it?"

I pause momentarily just watching her and surprisingly she doesn't look away as she often does. I have witnessed just how much my intensity scares her and I would hate for her to run away from me.

My tongue darts out to wet my lips and I watch closely for her reaction as I speak. "When you move in with me." I finally say.

Not that I expect her to move into Carlisle's home with me, but into the apartment that Alice put me in. Recently I have begun taking care of payments and have been fixing it up in order to show Bella that I actually do have a home. I longed to share my home with her and wake up to her beautiful face each and every morning. I wanted that more than anything and I hoped that it showed on my face.

"Edward..." She sighs.

"Not today, not tomorrow... but you're mine now, whether he knows it or not. And I don't want you living with him or sleeping in his bed."

"He's going out of town today, okay. I'm packing my things and staying with Leah for a few weeks. I will tell him the moment he gets back in town."

"I want to be there when you tell him." She starts to protest. "I don't fucking trust him to keep his hands to himself and nothing will stop me from killing him if he hurts you again, baby."

"Edward-" She tries to speak, but I cut her off, annoyed that she thinks doing any of this alone is acceptable. I should even be there when she packs and moves.

"No, Bella!" I don't mean to raise my voice but I'm fucking irate. "Goddamn it! Do you know what that did to me? Do you know what it felt like for me to see you bruised like that?" My voice cracks and I think she notices now that I am not just being an irrational jerk.

Shaking my head with pursed lips and worried eyes, I quickly speak again. "Can't do it again. I won't let anything like that happen to you ever again!"

"I told you it was an accident," She whispers and turns away, not able to look at me.

"It's always an accident Bella. That's how it starts-"

"Can you stop making him out to be such a bad guy?" She shouts, breathing heavily. Then she runs her hand over her forehead, massaging her temples. I'm so pissed I can't even look at her. I want to sooth her, calm her and make her feel better... but how can I when I can't even look at her?

"You're defending him," I state in a low rumbling voice, nodding my head in my own silent confirmation.

"Edward, it's not-" She begins, but I stop her short.

"I love you so much my chest hurts merely at the thought of your name. I love you so fucking much I can't breathe when I see you because you take my breath away. That's why I am patiently waiting for you to completely choose me ... but you haven't."

"Stop, Edward just listen to me okay. I can't forget my good times with him in one week. It doesn't work that way."

"Then tell me. How does it work? How do I get you to fall as madly in love with me as I am with you? Because baby, I am fucked up about you. I am crazy, mad, out of my mind in love you with you."

She looks at me then, her eyes smile, which brightens her entire face. My confession seemingly made her happy.

"I didn't lie when I said I love you. I just-I care for him. I feel like having you there will only cause a confrontation. I don't want to hurt him any more than he will already be hurting when I tell him that I am leaving him and not marrying him in two weeks as we planned because I am in love with you."

Her words cause my heart to leap, but still I am stuck in my own opinion of how this should go.

I take her hands in mine and hold them both to my lips as I look at her.

"There's so much good in you Bella. You're so good and honest, and-"

"I'm not all those things, Edward. How could I be? I have been going behind my fiancé's back for weeks seeing you. I am not good, Edward… and I am most definitely not honest. I am the worst kind of person."

"Don't do that. Don't talk down about yourself. You are good."

"I won't argue." She nods, her eyes wide and sincere. "Honestly Edward, you are the one that is good. There is only good in you. I love you." She takes my face in her hands and kisses me chastely.

When she pulls away she smiles brightly beaming at me. I once again take her hands in mine and give her a very serious look.

"If he even acts like he's getting angry or upset enough to touch you, you get the fuck out of there. You get me?"

She tilts her head slightly and smiles at me. "I do."

I kiss her hands, and then notice that her engagement ring is gone from her finger. I start to point it out but I keep it to myself, and instead I kiss that finger silently acknowledging the fact that I am pleased she is not wearing it.

* * *

Edward Pov

When we arrive at our spot, she parks and I run to open her door. Once she's outside, I finally kiss her. I lift her in my arms and mold my lips to hers in a proper kiss.

She wraps her legs around my waist and shoves her hand into my hair, the other grips at my shirt wanting me closer. I know the feeling. Being close but not close enough. Seems that's all we ever get of each other. But I swear soon she will be mine completely.

I sit her on the hood of the car and run my hands up the creamy skin of her legs. The past couple of days have been much warmer, due to the ending of spring. It seems I am being rewarded with Bella's constant need to show her skin.

I rub and squeeze her legs to keep her warm. She moans, and leans back against the car with closed lids mumbling about how good this feels.

"It's still cool out baby. I don't want you getting sick."

"I promise I won't get sick," She replies in a tone that lets me know she's annoyed because of how often I have been saying this to her.

I grab her arms and gently pull her up. I can't explain my need to have my lips on her constantly but it's pretty much all I think about.

I lean forward and kiss her, holding onto her sides as I do. Just as I'm deepening the kiss, she pulls away.

In irritation I say to her... practically groaning, "You've gotta stop doing that." I take a deep breath with the tilt of my head; I implore her to explain herself.

"Doing what?" She feigns innocence in her sugary sweet voice.

I set her on ice, frozen under my stare. "Pulling away from me."

Bella nervously shifts around and blows out a breath. She nods. "I just fear someone will see us and tell him before I get a chance to."

"And ... " I know there's more to her fears.

"And ... I fear he will try to take you away from me." The look she gives me lets me know that by _take me away she means she fears he will harm me._

"I wish he'd try." I tell her and peck her lips softly. Having enough of that conversation, I change the subject. "Are you going to read me what you wrote the other day?"

"I don't think I should." She smiles and tries to push her way out of my hold and off the hood but I stop her.

"Why not?"

"Because it sucks." She says. "I'm a storyteller. Not a poet."

"Didn't you tell me writing music and writing poetry was the same? Why isn't this the same for you?"

"It's just not." She shrugs. Then her eyes light up and she smiles. "I have an idea. Let's buy you a guitar and you sing for me."

Shaking my head no, I respond. "Quit stalling," I hand her the notepad.

"Quit pressuring me." She takes the pad angrily, and I chuckle. She's too adorable. I hold back the urge to kiss her.

"Quit being so fucking sexy," I say huskily and watch as she rolls her eyes, and looks heavenward.

"You're infuriating."

"Still stalling." I point out and laugh when she lets out a huff of annoyance.

"Fine." She clears her throat and looks back and forth between my eyes and the notepad several times before she begins.

 _The first time I saw snow,_

 _I was sheltered away safe in your arms._

 _Perfectly hidden away from the dark,_

 _But where did you go?_

 _I'm left to fend for myself in this frozen piece of heaven._

 _This place you left me to stumble around in doesn't allow me to dream._

 _I haven't daydreamed in a while, what happens if I've forgotten?_

 _My mind is an outstretched, barren field, iced over with snow,_

 _Blazed white, heaped with nothing but cold._

 _Restless on white feathers, cramped tight into my pillow at night,_

 _Still I'm deserted left in this frosty, alabaster slush, unable to sleep, unable to think._

 _There's no escaping it because you're not here._

 _I'm forced to fake it, forced to lie, forced to heal on my own._

 _Without my guardian. Without my Angel._

* * *

Bella Pov

"Can I speak to you, Bella?" Carlisle asks from behind Edward's bedroom door. He's currently in the shower, and I'm waiting for him to get dressed so that we can hang out as we've done every morning this week.

"Sure." I stand quickly and saunter out of his room, following Carlisle to the kitchen. He turns his back to me, fixing a cup of coffee. Once he pours his cup, he holds it up in silent offering and I decline.

He motions to a seat and I take it, he takes a seat across from me.

"Is this about Edward and me?" I ask him and watch his face waiting for a reaction. Carlisle sighs and then looks up at me.

"Did Demetri tell you how his father died?" Carlisle begins, and I furrow my eyebrows and shake my head no. "Of course, he wouldn't, and neither would Alice. It's not her place to say."

Now I'm really confused about where this conversation is going.

"My family has a long history of competing. Rather it's competing for jobs, money, fame, positions, status, possessions, affection, rather it be from parents, siblings, friends, a girlfriend or boyfriend, husband, wife, random people on the street..." He shakes his head in disgust. "We've never ever had boundaries." He says and my eyes widen because I had no clue. They act so normal around each other. Their dinner table is always a little on the quiet side, compared to what I'm used to, but I always assumed that it's how families with money act. I never could have guessed just how deep down and rooted their hatred is for each other.

"We tend to undermind each other, it's something my father did with his siblings, and his father and the rivalry has never ended. I can't stand my great uncle to this day for reasons I'm not completely even aware of. Simply because my father hated his brother and talked shit about him until the day he died."

I shake my head realizing that this must be why Demetri has Alice followed. Carlisle can possibly give me insight.

"My brother, Demetri's father, we liked to place bets, and wagers for large sums of money, or cars, or whatever possessions we had. One day it went too far. We bet on a woman." He looks down sadly, and I can see how ashamed he is. "We were young and stupid, and needed a new challenge, a new way to outdo the other."

"What was the bet?" I ask quietly.

He sighs heavily, and the pause is so long I almost believe he's not going to tell me. "Who could bed her first," He replies. "My wife was a mere bet years ago, something my brother and I played with."

"Who won?"

"I did. My brother was upset because she was an amazing woman, and she was beautiful, it was impossible not to love her. She was sweet, loving, caring, selfless, and I loved her with my whole heart."

"What happened?" I realize that neither Demetri's dad nor Carlisle's wife are alive now, and this must be the story of their death.

"My brother wanted her, he didn't care that we were in love. For years, even after my wife and I married, and he married and had Demetri, he still wanted her and he made sure every chance he got, to let it be known that he would have been the better choice." He took in a deep breath, which led me to believe that this was the hard part.

"My wife left me a few years ago because I worked too much. I know I did, but I couldn't help myself. She went straight to Aro, and it just showed me how fickle love is. But I couldn't live without her; I still loved her so much. I knew she had feelings for him because we both tried to actively to bed her. They had an affair, and I knew about it. But I just put everything into my work, hoping one day she would come back to me and I would have all of this money for us to travel the world."

"His wife found them in bed one day, in her bed, and she went crazy. She shot them both, before turning the gun on herself."

That's awful. I can't believe Carlisle has the strength to go on after that. He lost both his brother and his wife tragically.

"That's the most heartbreaking story I've ever heard in my life."

I didn't even realize that I'd been crying when I felt a tear fall down my cheek. I swiped at it and continued to speak. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because dear, you need to know what you're marrying into." His voice was firm.

"This rivalry thing still goes on." I ask him and he nods. "Demetri and Alice..."

He nods. "They're not the only ones, but yes. My other brother, Caius, has two children, Jane, and Alec."

"Yes, I've met them."

"Bella, this family is cursed. I'm not warning you off, but I'd hate for you to get mixed up in this family." Carlisle warns.

"Is Alice involved?" I ask him because I swear my friend can do no wrong. There's no way she would do anything to harm me.

"Alice is just as much a competitor as the rest of us. I'm sorry if we have led you to believe that we are something else, but I can't sit back and let you be dragged through the mud. This is your one and only warning." He's beginning to scare me.

"What's going on Carlisle?"

He opens his mouth to speak when I hear my name being called down the hall. I stand and wipe away my tears.

One look at me, and Edward knows. He rushes over to me with worried eyes giving me the once over, then he looks at Carlisle.

"What did you say to her?"

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Thank you all for reading! :)


	15. Chapter 15

Hi guys! I knowits been awhile but hopefully I can get back on schedule with my writing. I have been severely lacking motivation lately, and I'm generally always tired now. I do hope that you all enjoy this chapter which was beta-d by the lovely Sunflower Fran. Thank you so much Fran! I couldn't do this without you.

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

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Edward Pov

I step out of the shower calling Bella's name before walking out of the ensuite. I figured she would be uncomfortable if I changed in front of her and I am trying my best to be a gentleman.

However, I step into an empty room, the bedroom door ajar. I could hear Carlisle's low voice flowing down the hall from the kitchen area, and I just knew he was speaking to Bella. What I didn't know is why and it scared me. Carlisle knows things about me that I haven't yet told Bella, but I've been slowly working up to it.

I can't afford to think that way about Carlisle. He's been such a great friend for so long; he wouldn't tell Bella anything without talking to me first. I trust that he wouldn't do that.

I shake off the uneasy feeling and begin to dress. I move about quicker as anxiety starts to take hold of me, and every thought is intertwined with dread.

Already assuming the worst, I practically race out of the bedroom leaving the door slightly open in my haste.

"What's going on Carlisle?" Bella asks, and I can tell by her shaky voice that she is crying.

"Bella," I call her name softly even though I know exactly where she is. I'd hoped that I caused a halt in their conversation and that Carlisle was done 'explaining' things to her.

I step into the opening of the kitchen just as Bella is standing and not so subtly wiping tears from her eyes.

My eyes sweep across her face noting her red eyes, cheeks that are tear-stained and flushed and Instantly I am enraged by the sight. But first, I have to know that she's okay.

I rush over to her with worry deep down. 'Don't hate me.' I beg with my eyes. She smiles and instantly I know that everything is okay between us. Still, she's been crying, and I want to know why.

Turning my furious gaze on my only friend, I practically growl, "What did you say to her?"

"Son..." He begins holding an arm out to show that he means no harm; he even shakes his head with his gaze locked on the ground. His actions instantly calm me, because I know deep down that whatever he said to Bella was okay.

I take a step back and sigh, reminding myself that Carlisle is the only person I have considered family for a long time. He would never attempt to hurt me. It's not in him to hurt anyone; he's too good of a person.

"What did you tell her?" I ask in a much calmer tone, feeling Bella's hand slip into mine. I squeeze her hand and wait for Carlisle's explanation.

Carlisle looks down at our joined hands but quickly averts his gaze back to the ground his lip twitching with an attempt at hiding his not so subtle grin.

Then he points to our hands before speaking. "I didn't realize-"

I squeeze Bella's hand again before defensively asking, "Didn't realize what?"

His grin widens, and he places his hand on the table before standing to face us.

"My warning was for nothing." He says to Bella, and then his gaze flicks between us. "You two are together."

Bella takes a step in front of me. "I haven't told him yet." Bella's soft voice interjects, breaking my heart because of the tender way in which she speaks of 'him.' "Carlisle please, don't say anything. I have to be the one to do it."

Carlisle answers with a nod and a wave as he does most everything. "Of course not. This is a bit surprising. I was only just warning you of my family." Carlisle says, looking from Bella to me. "But you made the right decision all on your own."

Bella smiles then glances up at me, her smile growing. "I love her." It's that simple for me just as it has been since I first laid eyes on her.

"Don't I know it." He chuckles and Bella swiftly looks over at him, her brows knit together.

"You knew?" She asks in a soft barely audible whisper.

"Yes, I-" He stopped himself from saying too much and collects himself, clearing his throat. "It was pretty obvious. Edwards's feelings have never been well hidden where you're concerned."

"This explains why Demetri hates you so much." She nudges me playfully.

"Doesn't matter now, because you're mine." I grab her around the waist and pull her flush against me.

Carlisle clears his throat again to gain my attention, and I grant him a moment's glance before my heated gaze locks back on Bella. I want her so badly; my entire body buzzes with sexual energy. I think I have been more than patient, but I can't wait any longer. I have to make her mine in every way possible.

"Edward, I want you to begin working out of the office beginning Monday morning." He says, snapping me out of my thoughts of a naked Bella sprawled across my bed. My gaze locks with his as I wait for clarification. He doesn't speak, he just smiles.

"What?" Did he just say...?

"I think you're ready for your own office, and you need to establish yourself in this career."

"You think I can do this on my own? You think I'm ready?" I say with the highest level of skepticism.

He nods. "I believe in you."

"Wow. This is great Edward." Bella says from beside me, then she reaches up and kisses my cheek.

Carlisle walks around us, only stopping to remind me once again, "Monday, I want to see you."

"I'll be there."

He nods before walking off, leaving Bella and me alone. I lift her in my arms and twirl her around excitement buzzing through me.

"I'm so happy for you. Carlisle is a great mentor. You're lucky to have him." She looks down and clears her throat. "Carlisle taught Demetri everything he knows and-" She shrugs. "He's very successful." She finally looks up at me and jumps, startled by my intense look. I'm trying to get a read on her, but it's difficult when my emotions are in the way of all rational thought.

I have been in the midst of an internal battle lately when it comes to her and her feelings. She speaks of Demetri with such reverence, and it pisses me off. I know deep down that she still loves him, and the deep-rooted jealousy cripples me. I look away from her and huff out a breath trying to calm myself, but it's no use. The love of my life is in love with someone else and for all I know she's settling.

I move away from her and her eyes widen, worry etched in her delicate features.

My nostrils flare as my mind replays each time she has spoken of him with love in her tone. Jealousy has never been something I had to worry about, but I'm so close to having her to myself that the thought of her with Demetri drives me crazy.

I walk away from her and down the hall needing to put distance between us.

I feel her grasp my arm as I approach the hallway, and she tugs all while calling my name. "Edward talk to me. What did I say?"

I pull my arm away and walk into the room sitting on the bed with my head in my hands trying to catalog my thoughts.

"Edward, what's wrong? Baby, talk to me. Tell me what I did wrong."

I slowly raise my head until I'm looking into her big brown eyes and I die a little inside. I have never wanted anything as badly as I want Bella, but I fear she will never truly love me.

I take a deep breath before speaking the words that break my own heart. "You should go," I say, my eyes darting to the door then back to her.

Her jaw drops and her eyes widen further if at all possible. She doesn't speak for what feels like forever, and we just stare at each other. I watch as tears begin to fill her eyes, but none fall.

"You're kicking me out?" Her voice is shaky, and it takes all of my self-control to stay put where I am and not rush to her.

I run a hand through my hair and tug, frustration overtaking me.

"I'm giving you a way out." I huff, knowing that I can't have just a taste of her and then worry that she's going to run back to Demetri. I'm not sure why I thought I would be okay with it before, but now I'm sure. I can't share her. I need her here with me, not just physically, but I need her heart here too.

"A way out." She spits, repeating my words back to me and I cringe. Had I actually said that to her?

"Bella, I-"

"Don't pretend this is about me. This is for you, isn't it? It's your way out! This was just a game to you!"

"No. Of course not." I breathe, my head tilted down in shame. She thinks I'm treating our love as some kind of sport, and that's not it. She has no idea.

"Then what? Tell me that I am not willingly giving up my life to be with you for no reason at all."

"I just think you need time to make sure that I am truly what you want." I offer an explanation and even to me the words sound like utter bullshit.

"So that's it? You're just going to toss me out like trash? God, I can't believe I ever trusted you." She continues to go on and on, but my mind can't process her words, I'm so filled with rage as every memory of Demetri's hands on her filters into my brain on a continuous loop. I clutch my head in both hands and bend forward trying in vain to rid myself of the visions.

My mind stops on one moment at their engagement dinner. Her hand on his chest flashing her gaudy engagement ring in my face. That's not the focus of the vision that pushes me over the edge, but the look on her face as she gazed up at him. I remember thinking I would be a lucky son of a bitch if I could just get her to look at me that way. Has she ever looked at me that way? The answer doesn't come to me, and I slowly begin to lose my mind.

"You don't love me!" I shout at her causing her to jump. I take a calming breath and repeat my words much softer this time.

"Wow!" She says, shaking her head at me.

At that moment, I do see tears rolling down her cheeks, and she makes no attempt to wipe them away.

"Are you serious right now?"

Her tone causes me to rethink my words, rethink my actions... now I'm frantically searching for a way to backtrack.

"Baby, I can't-"

She quickly cuts me off. "You have some fucking nerve! You have been pursuing me relentlessly for months. My God Edward, you made me fall in love with you, and now you're just shoving it in my face." Her voice cracks as she blinks away tears.

I stand and take a step toward her, hating to see her cry and she quickly steps back further away from me. My heart beats frantically in my chest as I think of ways I might fix this.

"You think you know how I feel? You have no idea how I feel for you. You have no idea how hard I have attempted to fight myself, fight my feelings for you, push them off as mere attraction. God damn you, Edward! That's not what this is!"

I take another step toward her, and she takes a step away, her back hits the wall, and her shoulders shake as she surrenders to her tears.

"I can't help that I loved him first, but I love you now. Don't take this away from me!"

I finally reach her, press my body fully onto her, pushing her hair behind her ear and lifting her chin so that our gazes lock. We stare at each other for long seconds, neither of us speaking. There's only love, passionate heat and longing between us. No doubts or worries, no anger lingering beneath the surface. There's only us. Two broken halves matching up perfectly and rejoicing in that connection.

I feel the emotional dam break free when her breath hitches and the air rushes across my face. I instantly lose it and grab her face in my hands, smashing my lips to hers, kissing away every word of our conversation.

Need pulses through me and without breaking our kiss, I hoist her up, her legs wrap around my waist squeezing me close.

Bella takes all of my control and drugs my senses when she bites down on my bottom lip and drags it between her teeth moaning like she just can't get enough. A growl tumbles from my lips and I all but shove her back against the wall feeling supremely charged by the lust flowing between us.

Bella breaks our kiss to gasp for breath, clutching a fistful of my hair and tugging fiercely with one hand while the other trails fire down my skin with the rake of her nails. I take that moment to attach my lips to her neck, sucking the skin there and fuck, she smells and taste divine; I can't get enough.

I feel her fingers in my hair, tugging softly, pulling me impossibly closer, wordlessly begging me to continue.

I couldn't stop this if I tried. I want her body, her lips... every part of her will be loved, and she will finally know who she belongs to.

I swiftly turn from the wall and walk towards the bed, my hands firmly on her ass, my lips back on hers in a dominant kiss.

She moans and graciously accepts my fervent kisses like a woman that's been deprived of it for far too long.

Bella breaks free of our kiss, moaning just as her body begins to buck wildly against my own, her arms holding onto my shoulders for leverage. "God, Edward I want you."

I want her too, but I have to be patient or else I'll ram into her with the force of every remembered time that she's ever teased me. I'll essentially lose myself, lose control, and I can't risk hurting her.

I firmly press my lips to hers, letting her know just how badly I want her too. "Mmm." I groan against her lips, kissing her over and over again, greedily taking what's mine.

I hungrily accept the lusty swipes of her velvety tongue as she attempts to pull me closer and closer as if she wants me to climb inside of her. We kiss until our lips are bruised and swollen, our passion driving us to act out our body's desires.

I lay her back on the bed and settle between her legs, needing more of her sweet kisses, so much more. I would never get enough.

Bella Pov

This man is driving me insane. Not just physically but emotionally he is causing me to lose my mind one kiss at a time. He kisses me leisurely; the speed at which we were once making out has now turned into a maddeningly slow dance of mouths and tongues.

I'm a bit apprehensive now that my mind has caught up with my actions. Yes, I want him. Yes, I love him. Yet here I am stuck in my thoughts, needing to break free of the shackles Demetri has put on my mind.

I have only ever been with Demetri, and I am so worried that I will not be all that Edward wants me to be.

Edward pulls back and stares down at me, his brows low on his face. His intensity and direct focus hypnotize me and momentarily paralyze me.

He caresses my cheek. "You're so beautiful." He whispers his voice thick and pained, his lips barely move, but I hear him clearly.

I reach up and caress his stubbled face. "I love you. Don't doubt that."

He closes his eyes and leans into my touch his nostrils flaring up as he breathes.

"Never again. "He says, then his eyes flash open, and before I know what's happening, he's grabbing my hips and dragging me down the bed roughly, making the sexiest sound I have ever heard in my life. It's a deep rumbling sound from his chest that causes wetness to pool between my legs.

He pulls until I'm laying completely down flat on the bed and he's hovering over me. He hungrily attacks my skin again, groaning into my neck.

"Tell me that I can be there when you tell him." He groans, and I can't push out the words. I'm blissed out from the feeling of his lips on me.

I mumble something unintelligible, something that sounds a lot like, "Umgfugh."

"You taste so good here." He kisses my neck one last time, and I feel his hand trailing down my midsection. "I'm sure you taste even better here." He cups my sex through my jeans, and I buck my hips up to him, lifting off the bed like a possessed woman. In a sense, I am possessed, and I can't help myself.

"Oh God." I moan out and close my eyes, allowing myself to feel. He lifts my shirt and plants kisses down my stomach, dipping his tongue to taste my belly button. He grips my hips in his strong hands pinning me to the bed, haulting my squirming.

"Sexy as fuck." He groans as he starts kissing back up my stomach slowly, and I mean dangerously slow, enough to make me beg. Beg for something, anything, more. I need more, and I tell him.

"More." I whimper, and I feel him smile against my stomach.

"Patience baby. I've waited my whole life for you." He says as he reaches my chest. He palms my breast, staring right into my eyes as my nipples tighten under the feel of his hands. "You fit perfectly in my hands. You were made for me." He says and I nod, not able to say words, not even sure if that was a question, only knowing that I would say anything to make him keep his hands on me. To keep working me as he's doing.

"Don't stop touching me, please," I beg. I have never been touched like this. I've never been so hot, so turned on, so wet in my life. I never wanted something so badly.

"I promise not to stop touching you until you cum for me." He knows just what to say. He always knows what to say. "If I can be there when you tell him about us." Such an appealing proposition that I want to give into but I can't.

He lifts me slightly, undoing my bra and discarding it on the floor. Then he really begins to work me. I feel him kiss each nipple before diving in, licking, sucking like his life depended on it. I look down at him to see his eyes on me as he licks my nipple, taking it into his mouth slowly. I arch into him, grabbing handfuls of his hair to pull him closer, clutching him to my chest.

I'm a horny fucking mess from being sexually deprived for months. I know that it was my idea not to have sex with Demetri, but I figured that it would make our wedding night that much more special. It gave me something to look forward to. It gave us something to look forward to.

But now that I'm officially with Edward, all I can think about is his mouth, his hands, and his lips all over me. Demetri is so far from my mind as usual because I push him there in that far corner every time I'm around Edward. I want him there, locked away so that I can push down the guilt and betrayal. I shouldn't even feel guilty because honestly, I have been betraying my heart by sticking with him knowing how much I love Edward. My feelings for Edward rush to the surface every time that I'm with him and I tried to stay away, inadvertently denying myself the luxury of true love.

Not anymore.

"Mmm." I moan, bucking my hips upward for friction, any type of friction. He sits up on his knees and removes my shirt completely, looking down at me, appraising my body, and I suddenly feel exposed, bared to him.

"God, you're fucking perfect." He finally kisses my lips, and it's feverish and full of passion. All of his earlier soft kisses are gone, and now he is really kissing me. He's all lips, and tongue, and caresses, and I love it. His tongue is hot, and soft like velvet, stroking mine, and Jesus, he's killing me.

He groans into my mouth when I reach down to cup him through his jeans. His bulge is fucking perfection, and all of a sudden, all I can think about is having him inside of me.

"Say it." He growls.

"No." I breathe. I can't.

He kisses me again, once, twice, before quickly sitting upright pulling me along with him. I look up at him in confusion and quickly cover my naked body with my hands. I feel humiliated as I watch him stand from the bed and adjust himself.

What the fuck?

He stares at me, "What?" He asks with his brows raised like he's confused as to why I have a dumbfounded expression on my face. Now I'm pissed. He got me so hot and bothered and now he's acting like nothing happened.

"What the fuck?" I all but shout, and he shakes his head as if clearing the lusty haze and stretches his arms above his head, looking down at me impishly.

He quickly drops his arms and turns to face me with his fists at each of my sides in a very primal stance that shows off his strong arms and his broad shoulders, as he looks dead into my eyes.

"You're insanely sexy when you're pissed." He taps my nose. "My sexy little kitten." He unfurls a deadly smile, and it does crazy things to me, and I almost miss what he says because I'm so distracted with how sexily it curves at the end. His eyebrows low on his face, as he speaks.

"I need to be there."

I shake my head and play dumb. "Be where?"

He sighs. "Bella..." He's all of a sudden too serious, searching my eyes but I Iook away knowing I can't do that.

"You two will fight, and I couldn't bare it if either of you were hurt," I say with conviction, hoping that he gets the point to stop pursuing this.

It's not his fault, though. It's mine. I never had the strength to stay away from him, or fight the urges, or stop his advances. From the very beginning, he has made me weak in the knees. He took me away into a cloud with no chance of coming down, and now I'm fucking hooked on him. Obsessed even. His body calls to mine, and I come willingly without hesitation. That has never been the case with Demetri, and I should have called things off with him the moment I realized what I felt. Now Edward worries that I'll take him back. He's worried that Demetri still holds a place in my heart and can easily win me back.

"Right." He shakes his head in disbelief, looking away from me.

"Edward, you have to trust me."

He doesn't respond, he wordlessly reaches down, grabs my bra and shirt, gently tossing them to me.

"Put your clothes on." He demands and I roll my eyes.

"Are you really this unaffected?" He snatches the shirt and bra back out of my hand, and my eyes snap up to his as he takes a step close to me; his body, flush against me, and his eyes gazing deeply into mine.

He grabs my hand and drags it down to feel him through his jeans, and with an almost pained expression, he whispers. "Trust me I'm affected, love."

I let out a heavy breath and fight the urge to fan myself. I am hot and bothered. Edward pulls away and wags his index finger at me. "I have plans for you." He swats my ass, and I gasp in shock almost missing my shirt that he tosses back to me.

"Get dressed."

* * *

I hope you have enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for taking the time out to read it! :)


	16. Chapter 16

Hi guys! I hope you enjoy this chapter. :)

This chapter was beta-d by one of the best. Thank you so much Sunflower Fran.

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

* * *

Bella Pov

An hour later, we are standing in front of a restaurant that I have never been to before. It's a cozy jazz club in a part of town I rarely venture to.

The walls are a blood red, but the large area is so dimly lit that the lights cast faint shadows across the room. As we venture further into the building we are greeted by a hostess, and I notice just how incredibly crowded the place is.

"I've always wanted to come here." He whispers into my ear as he presses his hand to the middle of my back urging me in front of him to follow the hostess. I hadn't noticed her waiting; I was too busy gawking at the place.

As we walk through rows and rows of tables, I notice how intimate the restaurant is. Each table is decorated with white cloth, and a lit candle adorns the center flickering brightly, adding to the peaceful yet sensusal ambiance.

I reach back and grip Edward's arm. "This place is charming." I glance up and see him unfurling a huge smile. He grabs my hips and leans down to my ear.

"Did you see the stage?" He asks in a soft voice, but I hear him over the chatter.

He points ahead and to the left of where we are headed. That's when I notice the small stage in the corner. My mouth drops open because I think I know exactly why he's brought me here.

I turn into his arms and try to halt his steps, but he continues to walk forward causing me to walk backward with his hands along my hips. "No, Edward, I can't-"

He stops walking and kisses me quiet. "Don't do anything you're not comfortable doing. I won't make you."

I nod slowly feeling a little out of sorts. He quickly turns me in his arms, and that's when I notice the hostess waiting for us to take our seats. Edward pulls out a chair for me and kisses my cheek softly before taking his seat.

"What can I get you to drink?" The waitress asks sweetly with her attention dead set on Edward. He motions for me to speak first and the hostess turns to look at me.

"Water with lemon is fine, thanks," I say with an edge to my voice, pissed at all the attention she's giving Edward.

"And for you handsome?" She smiles at Edward, shamelessly flirting.

"I'll have the same." He says kindly, his eyes on me. He reaches both hands across the table and lifts my hands to his lips not caring in the slightest that the hostess is still hovering.

"Sure. Coming right up."

He smiles against my hands that are still pressed to his lips.

"What?" I question.

His smile widens as he brings my hands back to the table running his thumbs slowly over them.

"Never would have pegged you as the jealous type."

"I'm not," I say, indignation heavy in my tone.

He shakes his head, momentarily looking away toward the stage with a smile on his face. He sits up straighter, his attention instantly pulled to the man sitting on a stool behind the microphone with a guitar in his lap.

Next to him, a woman is standing in front of an easel, her back to the waiting crowd. She looks over at the guy and nods, prompting him to begin.

"This one is entitled..." He strums the guitar once, bowing his head dramatically. "Sudden courage."

"She gives me courage

In a time when pain is all I've known."

He plays the guitar lightly as he recites his poem.

Just then the waitress comes back and places our drinks in front of us. She takes the hint to walk away after our polite thank you's.

"You see the girl painting?" I hear Edward speak into my ear, and my eyes shift to the right where she is stroking her paintbrush purposefully across the bare canvass.

"Wow, so she paints while he recites the poem," I state my observation, and he nods.

"The beauty is that she doesn't know what his poem is about when she first begins. Her objective is to paint the interpretation of his poem before he is done reciting it."

My eyes widen in awe as I look over at him, then back at the man and woman on stage.

"That is fascinating," I say excitedly, a broad smile on my face as I watch her. "How did you find this place?"

He shifts in his seat looking uncomfortable. "I worked here for a short time, porting and-"

"Porting?" I ask quietly, my eyes still fixed on the woman's canvass.

"Yeah, it's basically a parking lot cleaner. I never came inside, but I've always wanted to. I would asked the employees questions about the place because on Friday nights, the sign said 'For poets and painters.'" He shrugs. "I'm not a poet, nor a painter, but I found that to be extremely fascinating."

"It is." I turn my excited grin to him, and his eyes flash across my features before his face also breaks out into a smile. Then he leans forward and presses his lips to mine. It's a very chaste kiss compared to many of our others, but it still leaves me breathless.

When he pulls away, I can't help the smile on my face. I'm so incredibly happy right now, and it's all because of Edward; so I tell him.

"I'm so happy," I say and feel myself tearing up at the thought. "You make me happy," I whisper, my voice shaky but sure, as my shoulders rise with the words. I have never been so sure about Edward as I am right this second. "I love you." I mouth, not trusting my voice at the moment.

He kisses me again, a barely there brush against my lips. He tucks a stray hair behind my ear, and I shudder, feeling exposed under his deep green gaze. "I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you Isabella Marie Swan."

I sniff a few times, smiling through a few tears. "Every time you say that I cry." I try to joke, wiping at my wet eyes. "You're going to think I'm an emotional wreck."

"I don't think that." He shakes his slightly tilted head.

I look away nervously, noting that there are two new people on the stage. I feel his eyes watching me as I look at the new painter, while listening to the words the poet softly speaks. It's a woman doing the poem this time, and a man at the easel.

"Carrying the burden of my mother's pain

and the pain of her mother before her."

I hear the woman say, watching closely as the artist paints a woman, pregnant with the world. It's only the outline, but I can tell that's what it is.

I feel, rather than see, Edward watching me with his eyes squinted. God, he's sexy as hell when he does that.

"Don't do that," I tell him, trying to look away from him, but he still has the look in his eyes. "Don't look at me like that." I squint my eyes back, mimicking him and he looks away chuckling to himself.

"That's how I look at you?" There's an easy smile playing on his lips as he points from himself to me. I nod, answering his question.

He bites down on his lower lip and drops his gaze before glancing back up at me with that same look. "There it is again. Stop doing that. My lady parts can't take it."

"I can't help it." He admits in a gentle tone, and I blush knowing he's telling the truth because he always looks at me that way. Like I'm the only girl in the world.

Hours pass with us watching the painter and listening to poetry. After almost an hour into dinner, Edward and I decide to order food instead of just sitting and enjoying drinks much as others are doing. Edward orders a burger, and I order a green goddess chicken salad and a bowl of tomato soup, which Edward seems to like. I offered him my spoon once, and now he's taking his own spoon full of the soup.

This is something I never had with Demetri. The comfortable flow of conversation and a meal to share. He wouldn't think it appropriate to eat from my spoon, and he'd think it unladylike for me to grab fries from his plate.

Edward orders a beer and asks if I want one. I start to say no, remembering that Demetri hates the smell of beer on my breath, which is why I hadn't had one in years. It's become a habit to turn down alcohol for his sake because if he smelled it, he wouldn't kiss me. He could drink all he wanted, but for a lady to drink anything but wine, to him, it was unbecoming.

Even when I drank wine it had to be in his presence, and my limit was two glasses. There were always rules and conditions with Demetri; nothing was ever this comfortable or sweet. Our relationship felt more like an arrangement if I'm being honest, and marriage would have only solidified it on paper, making it appear even more like a contract.

"Why the hell not." I wave my hand in the air, dismissing all thoughts of Demetri.

"I heard that you went to lunch with your brother this week. Why didn't you tell me?"

He looks down and shrugs, looking almost like a lost child for a second. He sighs and glances back up at me, before looking up at the stage.

"It's not important." He mutters lowly, trying to make me leave the subject alone. But I can't.

"Why is it that whenever I want to know about you, it's not important. You already know everything about me. I hardly know about your life."

His eyes flash to me. "My life before you was insignificant."

I pause thinking over what he'd just said. "Were you like a secret agent, a hired killer or something? You can tell me if you were. I'm in too deep now to look back." I'm desperate to know his life, even if to him it's unimportant details.

He sighs heavily. "I'm not a secret agent or anything Bella I just have nothing to tell. I have no story, no background, and no family. There was no life to live before I met you. I had no purpose, no direction."

"I gave you purpose? Direction?" I probe him, loving that he is finally talking about himself. I don't want him to close himself off from me.

"You gave me everything I never thought I wanted."

"That's funny because you did the same for me," I tell him, chuckling to myself at the thought. You never know what it is that you're missing until its being dangled right in front of you. I never would have questioned my relationship or my love for Demetri if it weren't for Edward stepping into my life.

"What about you? Have you talked to your stepmother and step sister?" He asks, raising a brow. I'd pushed him to start a relationship with his brother after meeting Emmett at the club weeks ago. Then he began the task of pressuring me to make amends with my ridiculous family.

"Elena and Vanessa are doing well, actually. I talked to them yesterday." I clear my throat. "They want to visit me."

He raises both brows in surprise. "What did you tell them?"

I shrug, thinking back to our conversation. "That I would think about it."

"I can be there with you when you see them. I want to support you in that decision. I know that family is important to you."

That's another problem between Edward and me. He hates the fact that he doesn't have a family to offer me as Demetri does. Yes, I am close to the Cullens, but then again, I don't have to have them in my life. I want him. I love him, and I want him to see that. He thinks being closer to my family will fill the void, but I doubt it. He can't see that I don't need family. I only need him.

After eating our meal over lovely conversation, with poetry wafting in my ears, I grab Edward's hand and squeeze feeling dazed and... happy. I have never been happier in my life.

"Thank you for bringing me here." My words are sincere. This is the best date I have ever had.

"I knew you'd love it."

"I do. I really do." I look around noting that the microphone and easel are now missing, and there is music playing through the speakers.

"Would you like to dance?"

I look around noting how close the tables are to each other and that there isn't much of a dance floor.

"No one else is dancing."

"I didn't ask anyone else. Only you." He says as he stands. I chuckle shaking my head at him. He grabs my hand and holds it as I stand and walk around to face him.

He holds me in his arms, one hand holding mine close to his heart, the other wrapped around my waist. We sway slowly to 'Never Think' and he begins to sing the lyrics to me in his thick gravelly voice. I knew he could sing, but had never officially heard him, so this is a welcomed surprise to me.

"You sound just like him, you know," I tell Edward, and he smirks.

"He sounds just like me." Edward corrects, and I grin up at him.

"My mistake."

He grins back at me, his eyes flashing with happiness as he claims my lips in a perfect kiss, gripping me closer, his hand now cupping the side of my face, making its way to my neck.

I hum into his mouth, pulling away, remembering that we are in a crowded place.

"We need to stop, or they are going to kick us out for indecent exposure."

He kisses me again, his eyes closed as he whispers against my lips. "Let them."

I smile into his kiss, and he smiles back, our teeth clinking through our kiss. I feel him suck my bottom lip into his mouth and bite it causing me to moan.

I shove my hands through his hair, feeling like I'll explode with desire.

"I need to get you out of here." He growls but its low, for only me to hear. His hand slides down my neck, over my shoulder and down my arm to my hand. He looks away from me, presumably motioning to the waitress.

I look over in time to see our waitress hand Edward the check, and he looks down, studying it for a second as if he'd never seen one before.

"Do you have it? I can-" I try to pull my hand away to walk to my purse, but he tugs me back to his side without looking up.

"Don't you dare." He says with an edge to his voice. Then he looks at me and then to his chair next to him. "Have a seat beautiful. This will only take a second."

I sit, placing my hands on my lap as he talks in hushed tones to the waitress before reaching into his pocket to retrieve a plastic card.

The waitress walks away, and he takes a seat next to me. "You don't carry a wallet." I point out to which he nods.

"Never had a need for one I guess." He answers honestly, and I'm instantly curious as to why that is.

"When's your birthday? I'm going to buy you one."

"You'll be waiting a while. It's June 20th." He tells me, and I nod.

"Of course, you're a Gemini. Explains so much." I tease, grinning like an idiot and so does he. He reaches forward for my face and is inches away from kissing me when we are interrupted by the waitress.

She hands him the card and receipt. "Enjoy the rest of your night." She says with a smile before walking away without another word.

Later that night, Edward and I stumble through the doors of what I know to be Jasper's old condo. Flashes of the last time I ever spent in this place blur my vision even as I try to focus all of my energy on getting Edward undressed as fast as humanly possible.

After flailing around in the dark, kissing and undressing each other, we fall into bed, tangled limbs wrapped in the covers.

Edward is an incredibly sweet and tender lover, generous in his every action, only looking to draw pleasure from me.

He'd caressed and licked me until I was a squirming mess coming undone beneath him.

I'm trying hard to show restraint because I can tell he is taking things slow, he wants to be tender, and gentle, whereas I want him to take me recklessly. I want him so deep that our souls connect, and our inhales and exhales become one.

God, I love this man so much it feels as though my heart could burst from my chest at any moment.

I feel, rather than see Edward squeeze my breasts in his hands, and I arch into him yelping from the pleasure.

He rolls my nipples between his fingers and then leans forward, gently biting the tip of my nipple, grazing it with his teeth before slowly releasing it.

"Oh my god!" I moan and grasp his hair in my hands when he does the same thing to the other nipple.

He then begins to plant slow, languid kisses up my body, licking, sucking, nipping, and I love every second of it. Feather- like kisses move across my body like a brush trailing warmth in its wake.

When he reaches my neck, I know that I am going to lose my mind because he has a way of tearing down my defenses with a kiss.

"Edward." I whimper, closing my eyes to enjoy the paramount of pleasure rushing through me.

"Hmm." He groans against my neck in question but I'm tooo far gone to reply.

His tongue strokes around my ear, nibbling on the lobe, before releasing it ever so gently causing me to shudder. Then he kisses just under my ear, and my heart sings.

"God, I'm dying here. I need you, Edward." I tell him, and he chuckles lowly before his mouth engulfs me with one of his loving kisses. The kind that seemingly worships me.

Edward pulls back and stares at me with low hooded eyes, biting down on his bottom lip.

"You're so beautiful." He whispers, running his nose along mine. "So soft." He runs his hand slowly down my side trailing goosebumps. He looks into my eyes, intensity scorching my skin. "Do you want me, baby?" He asks, his voice low and husky, as he presses his groin against me and rolls his hips.

"Edward, please," I beg for him to take me, and he understands my urgency. He positions himself at my opening and kisses my chest right above my heart before driving into me.

He slowly glides in and out of my wet core, pleasuring me with his precise movements. I gasp sharply when he slowly pulls out and then thrust into me at a painfully slow pace.

"Bella...Christ." He groans from deep within his chest, his eyes shut tight as he maintains his slow, measured strokes.

He leans down and presses his lips to mine devouring my lips and caressing his tongue against mine. I hungrily return his passionate kisses as I can already feel the need to orgasm burning deep within me.

"Yes, Edward. God yes!" I cry out, wrapping my legs around his hips urging him deeper inside of me. I gasp slightly, and my eyes fall closed when I feel him rise higher to make longer deeper strokes.

"You feel so good, baby." He lets out a strangled groan when I wrap my legs tighter around him and lift my hips. He's so deep at this angle.

Edward's lips cover mine, kissing me passionately, reverently, and I still want more.

"More." I beg of him. I need more. I grip his back, gasping when he slowly pulls completely out of me, before pistoning so deep I lose my senses, and my breath catches in my throat. I feel so overwhelmed by the sensation; I can't help but dig my nails into his skin and hold on for the ride.

"You want more, baby?"

I writhe beneath him, panting, and shivering, loving the feel of him deep inside of me.

We move intimately in sync as Edward stares deep into my eyes, gingerly kissing my lips every so often.

He slowly drives forward, circles deeply and withdraws lazily, over and over again. I don't know how much more I can take. "Do that again! That feels so good."

He kisses my shoulder, my chest, and my neck up to my chin, before claiming my lips.

I gasp on a lazy grind, and he pulls back to look at my face. I squeeze my legs and lift them even higher causing him to hit places deep inside that I never thought existed. He growls loudly, pulls out quickly, and roughly thrusts back inside of me.

He kisses me tenderly stopping all movement. I lift my hips, grind against him, groaning in frustration. I don't want him to stop.

I nip his tongue. "Please."

He grins down at me and thrusts forward filling me to the hilt, holding still. He slowly withdraws, before ramming back into me. I throw my head back, and arch from the bed.

"Yes, baby!" I feel him lazily continue to thrust into me, slowly, dangerously so, and I feel every bit of his thick cock at each long and divinely sensual stroke.

The wracking shudder that courses through my body has me clenched around Edward's arousal, shaking wildly against him as I moan my release into his mouth.

It's not long before he thrusts deep and stills inside of me, jerking as he fills me with his hot release. He holds himself deep inside, pulsating and empties into me. He clenches his eyes closed while paying loving attention to my lips, moaning into my mouth. It seems as if every inch of me is touching him, engulfed in his warmth and loving presence. I'm filled with contentment, as I lay wrapped around him. Our hearts beat rapidly and both of us gasp for breath lightly as we try to calm our racing hearts.

Edward rolls onto his back minutes later and pulls me close, nuzzling his nose into the crook of my neck.

I smile in contentment and close my eyes, feeling relaxed and thoroughly pleased. We'd just made love, and it was perfect. It was better than perfect, more than I could have imagined.

I grasp his hand intertwining his with mine. I kiss the back of his hand and rub it against my cheek, feeling like a lovesick teenager.

"I love you," I whisper into the air, thinking that Edward must be asleep.

I feel him kiss my neck and grumble, "I love you, baby."

Tears well in my eyes, filling my heart with so much hope. We can actually do this. I can actually walk away from Demetri and be happy with Edward because we love and respect each other, and we make each other happy.

I snuggle in closer to him, and he squeezes me tighter to his chest. Just as I'm falling asleep something occurs to me, and my eyes fly open.

We didn't use a condom.

Bella Pov

The next morning I wake before Edward with him still wrapped around me like his lifeline. I spend the quiet time staring at the ceiling wondering if I should bring up the fact that we hadn't used protection. I know that I should, but how.

Another worry floods my mind and ultimately takes precedent. How am I going to face Demetri today?

Just as the thought crosses my mind, I hear my phone ringing in the living room. I slowly wiggle out of Edward's embrace and quietly make my way there.

I retrieve my purse from the floor where it was tossed carelessly last night and grab my phone just as it stops ringing.

I check out the call log and notice four missed calls from Demetri. With a sigh of resignation, I decide to call him back. He doesn't give me a chance because seconds after my finger hovered over his name, he calls back.

I answer with a huff, feeling frustrated by his actions.

"Hello."

"Bella, where the hell are you?" He asks his voice low and controlled but I can tell he's angry.

I sigh briefly before responding. "I'll be there in a minute."

"You mean you'll be home in a minute." He corrects me to which I just roll my eyes and move the phone to my other ear. "I expected you when I arrived last night. I was forced to sleep alone."

"You'll live Demetri, I promise. I do it almost every night, and I'm just fine."

He's quiet for a long time, and I check the phone just to make sure he hasn't hung up.

"Are you upset with me baby? Is this about our trip? I told you I would make it up to you. I promise. Things have just been so crazy lately what with my uncle returning. I'm forced to bend to his will, hand him over accounts, close many of my business relationships because he feels they are harmful to the company's reputation-"

"Why are you telling me all of this?"

"Because, Bella." His tone is clipped. "There's a distance between us and I don't like it. You need to understand my everyday life."

"I understand," I tell him, even though I could really care less.

"Great! So can you come home now? It's awful cold here without you. Looks to me like you haven't been home since I left."

"I had things to do," I answer quickly, grabbing up my clothes from around the living room.

"Of course." He sighs. "Come quickly. I miss you."

An hour later, I pull up to the place that I have called home for over a year now. When I step inside, I look around feeling out of sorts like I'm in a stranger's home. This place no longer holds the warmth, the peace that it once seemed to have and I know why. It's because of Edward. I am home wherever he is. This place is now foreign to me. Maybe it always has been, and I was kidding myself.

"Bella, sweetheart," Demetri calls to me. "I'm in the office." He doesn't even come out to greet me, he expects me to come to him.

I sigh, realizing I should get this over with as quickly as possible. I wasn't expecting him back so soon and hadn't had time to pack my things. I wasn't so worried about it at the moment, though; I only wanted to quickly have this conversation and hope that he let us split ways amicably.

I stop just at the door of his office and knock softly. His head lifts, and he smiles.

"Hi." I wave awkwardly and offer a small smile.

"Come, I need your input on our honeymoon location. I was thinking-"

"Demetri, about that..." I cut him off before he can finish his thought. I can't hear about all of the work he's putting into our honeymoon.

His face goes stony, and he is completely still, waiting for me to say more.

"I have something to say."

He nods and clears his throat, backing away from his desk a little, leaning back in his chair cooly.

"Okay."

With a sigh, I begin to express my feelings. "Lately, I have been feeling us drifting apart," I say cautiously, watching his face. "Demetri, we have shared great times together, and I will always cherish them, but-"

"Wait, wait, Bella- what are you saying? Wh-" He slowly stands from his seat, his hand splayed against his tie as he stares at the ground beneath my feet, confusion set in his features.

"I'm saying that we are living two separate lives, Demetri. We aren't good together, we're not good for each other and I-"

"I don't understand." He says softly, then his sad eyes slowly lift to my face and I see that my words have caught him completely off guard.

This will not end well.

I sigh and try again. "I've changed," I tell him. "It's me, I promise. I have changed, and the things that were important have become small and insignificant."

"You're telling me that I have become small and insignificant?" He asks with squinted angry eyes. I shut my mouth unable to answer. "Answer me." He bites out through grit teeth, and still, I can't respond because if I say yes, then I'm lying, but if I say no, then I may give him the wrong idea.

No, he has not become small and insignificant, I still care about him, I still believe in him, but I don't love him anymore. Edward has completely filled my heart, and there's no longer room for Demetri.

"Goddamn, it Bella! Answer me!" He roars from across the room, and I feel the impact of his anger.

"No." I breathe out finally in a soft tone. "That's not what-"

"Tell me, what the fuck is going on with you." He says slowly through controlled breaths.

"I can't do this anymore, Demetri," I whisper with my head tilted down as tears prick the back of my eyes. "I can't marry you."

I hear him take a deep breath, and I imagine he held it. Because in the quiet of the room, no other noises can be heard. Seconds later I hear him exhale slowly and look up in time to see that he has turned away from me and is looking out th window with his arms crossed behind his back.

He doesn't speak for a long while, and I am left staring at his back, feeling like absolute shit for hurting him. He has hurt me many times over the years, emotionally and physically, but somehow this seems so much worse. I feel as though I have gutted him and left him here to bleed alone.

"Say something."

He doesn't. He just rolls his shoulders and continues to stare out the window.

"Please."

He sighs long and warily "This is about him." He nods as if convincing himself.

"No, Demetri, this isn't about anyone."

He turns back around to face me. "Don't insult my intelligence Isabella. This is most certainly about him."

I say nothing but lift my chin higher in case I have to defend the man that I love.

"Tell me..." He trails off, coming around the desk slowly, his index finger dragging along the desk as he comes toward me.

Once he's right in front of me, he looks deep into my eyes and smirks. "How did he do it?"

"How did he do what?" I ask him, squaring my shoulders because now I feel a bit threatened.

"How did he get you to fall? Did it feel familiar in any way? Make you comfortable because he suddenly knew all about you without actually getting to know you. Doesn't that sound familiar Bella?"

I look down, searching my brain for the memory, but I come up blank.

"Remember how we met?" He backs away slowly. "Remember how much you were against the idea of dating but I still won you over. Do you know how I did that? By making you feel comfortable. By investing in what I wanted. I knew everything about you before you even opened your pretty little mouth to tell me your name."

"Because of Alice," I say, and he shakes his head.

"No. Alice was against the idea from the beginning. I looked you up, I followed you, I read up on you. You know why?"

My eyes widen with each word he speaks. "Because I wanted you and I was going to have you."

I slowly think over his words, processing everything, taking it all in. Trying to go back two years ago to when he first began to pursue me.

"Alice started the bet." He says like it's nothing, but my eyes snap to his at the mention of a bet. "I just thought you were this girl, random and ordinary, but you weren't, you aren't... and I learned that quickly. I, of course, won that bet when I won you. I won Alice's Porsche. I felt it was easy. I didn't even want the car anymore, I only wanted you."

My mind is racing now, and I can't seem to slow it down. What exactly is he telling me? That my two closest relationships have been based on a lie.

"Last time, we bet I couldn't win your heart." He asks, and my eyes snap up to his. "This time, we bet that I couldn't keep it. You are proving them right. You are proving how fickle your love is."

"My love is not-"

"Don't deny it baby. You played right into Alice's plan. I'm sure your little boyfriend was in on it. Where the hell did he come from Bella? Do you even know? Did he tell you?"

"You're lying," I whisper, my voice shaky and unsure.

"I'm not, baby. I am only guilty of having a ridiculous obsession with you. I am only guilty of loving you. I only said yes to the bet because I was so sure of us. I was so sure that you would never stray from me. I thought you were just as obsessed with me."

I reach behind me for the wall, feeling like I could possibly pass out at any moment.

This is all too much, and I can't breathe.

Everyone I love has been lying to me.

Even Edward.

* * *

Thank you for reading! :)


	17. Chapter 17

Bella Pov

Edward's here. Edward's at the front door banging; demanding that I open it. He is not the least bit worried about the fact that this is Demetri's home, and he could possibly be the one to open the front door. He's only concerned with getting to me. I can tell by the urgency in his voice as he shouts my name in hopes that I'll hear him and answer.

For some reason, my brain isn't processing things quick enough, and I haven't moved. I feel Demetri walk past me and out the door closing it behind him, but still I don't move. Then I hear the front door open, and I hear Edward shouting, but still, I'm frozen in shock, and I'm not sure what to believe.

The door near me bursts open and in rushes Edward. He gets one good look at my face and grows angry.

"What did he do?" He asks me in a low, gritty voice that snaps me out of my haze. I look to him just in time to see him turn back around and leave the room.

My body catches up with my brain then, and I quickly rush out behind him realizing that I need to do something.

When I turn the corner into the foyer, I see that Edward is stalking towards Demetri, who is in a casual stance with both hands in his pockets completely unfazed by Edward's anger.

"Don't, Edward! Stop!" I shout rushing to stand between them with my hands against Edward's chest. "Edward! Please!"

I push hard against him but he never once stops his advance.

"I'm going to enjoy wiping that smug look off your fucking face." Edward sneers at Demetri, his eyes ice cold, deadly; he's barely recognizable.

"He didn't do anything! He didn't hurt me!" I shout at Edward reaching up on the tips of my toes to get in his face. I just need to gain his attention and ask him to leave before Demetri does something reckless. I won't be able to stop them if they are both at each other's throat.

Edward stops and drops his angry and confused gaze to me.

"He hurt you. He..." He trails off, closing his eyes momentarily. When they open, the icy look is gone and all that is left is tenderness. He cups my face in his hands, running his thumb across my cheek.

"I'm okay," I whisper, gripping his wrist as he swipes his other thumb over my cheek, staring deep into my eyes.

"Swear it." He demands in all seriousness, brows level and jaw set in place as he tries so hard to rein in his anger.

"I swear." My eyes anxiously dart between his as I try to assure him that Demetri has done me no harm.

Somehow, my eyes become trapped in his gaze, and I realize deep down in my heart that there is no way the love displayed there could ever be faked. No one has ever looked at me the way that Edward does. He looks at me as if I were the sun, the light to his darkness. He looks at me as if I am his world, his everything. He loves me, there's no doubt in my mind that his words are true.

"That's enough! Get your hands off my fiancé." Demetri shouts and that's when I snap out of my trance and remember where I am and the fact that things can get ugly.

Edward ignores Demetri and slowly slides one of his hands from my cheek to my neck where he lightly squeezes.

Out of nowhere, we are shoved, and Edward's hands slide to my waist holding me steadily.

"I said; get your hands off her. She is mine! Get the hell out of our home!"

Edwards tenses and then quickly releases me, making a move towards Demetri with balled up fists, but I grab his arm and tug him.

"Please! Please don't fight!" I beg Edward to see how much it will hurt to watch them fight over me. "Please, just leave."

"What?" He looks down his nose at me with a nearly ferocious facial expression. "I'm not leaving here without you."

"Yes," Demetri says seconds before he shoves Edward. "You are."

He makes a move to push Edward again, but Edward tugs his arm free of my grasp effortlessly and swings at Demetri. The god awful cracking noise that follows causes my eyes to well with tears so quickly I blink, trying to block out what's going on around me. The shock of the event has nearly caused me to black out.

I hear them scuffling, and I hear glass breaking as they crash into things and the grunts and smashing of fists. I ignore it all and rush out the front door to my car. I crank it up quickly and pull out of the driveway making a hasty getaway to nowhere.

I drive and drive for hours with tears blurring my vision until I'm miles away from home and practically lost. Soon I realize that I am near my stepmom's home and quickly make my way there. It's time I visit with her and get away from all the craziness of my life.

Twenty minutes later, I pull up to her home and sit there a moment, just staring, wondering if anything has changed. The house is still painted green, a color I hated when I was a teen but have now come to appreciate, as it is a reminder of Edward's eyes. I smile at that thought, but quickly remember that I begged him not to fight, and he still did. Then I remember that he lied to me, and he's a part of some elaborate scheme with Alice.

The swirling of thoughts is upsetting, bringing me to the brink of tears, but I shove them back. I close my eyes and make a rule for myself at that moment. I will not think about the life I left back in Seattle, and I will enjoy my visit for as long as they allow me to stay here.

I take a deep breath and at that, exact moment there is a tap on my window. It does, of course, scare the hell out of me, and I jump back inhaling a sharp breath.

"Bella?" A shrill voice followed by another couple of taps causes me to roll my eyes. Elena has never been a patient woman so I'm not sure why I'm so surprised that she couldn't even wait for me to knock on her front door.

She opens the car door for me and puts a hand to her hip. "Are you going to just sit out here all day?"

"Hello to you too, Elena. How are you?" I step out of the car and roll my eyes at the dismissive flick of her wrist.

"Let me guess... you ruined the wedding. That's why you're finally visiting your family."

"Don't be a bitch, Elena! I came because I wanted to."

Elena's lips thin, and she visibly stiffens at the offensive word, but I don't care. She is being a bitch!

"You must be Bella?" I hear an unfamiliar voice near the front door, and I turn to see a woman, nearly my stepmoms age with shiny hair, a very unnatural shade of brown that instantly reminds me of Edward's unusual shade. I must be going crazy because I swear everything reminds me of that man.

"I'm Esme, a friend of Elena's. It's so nice to finally meet you."

I'm about to offer my hand out to Esme when I am attacked from the side by Vanessa. She's squealing in delight when she wraps her arms around me practically hanging onto me like a monkey.

She pulls back still squealing, and then goes back in for another hug, rocking from side to side.

"Oh my god, Bella, it's really you." She says quietly getting choked up. I knew that she missed me, and I missed her too, but it's impossible to visit her without visiting Elena.

Over Vanessa's shoulder, I see Elena roll her eyes at her daughter's dramatics. Glancing over at Esme I see that she has a very fond look on her face, and even looks to be tearing up. Elena notices and lightly smacks her arm.

"Reunions get to me," Esme explained, dabbing at her eyes. "Especially the ones that go well."

"Get a hold of yourself Vanessa. It's just Bella."

Vanessa sniffs and pulls away. "I'm sorry, Bella. I'm crying all over you." She says and I smile at her, thinking that maybe staying away wasn't the best course of action.

"Can we go back in the house now?" Elena stumbles a bit, and I roll my eyes again because it's becoming apparent that she's been drinking.

Vanessa wraps an arm around my waist and leads me to the front door as she begins to speak a mile a minute.

"You look amazing Bella. Look at those shoes. What kind of money is that man of yours making? Does he have any younger brothers? Cousins? I'm not picky."

I laugh at her rambling and shake my head at her because honestly she hasn't changed one bit. I haven't seen her since I left for college, six years ago, but even as a preteen Vanessa was a ball of energy.

"Don't answer that." She finally says, looking away blushing. "I'm technically seeing someone."

"Who? A boy from school? Do I know him?"

She blushes redder if that's even possible and begins to fidget. "No, not from school. He's older. Much older." She sighs. "You have to promise not to tell Mom."

I shot her a look. "I barely communicate with the woman."

She sighs again. "Jacob Black." She tells me, and I stiffen, remembering that we dated in high school.

"Jacob Black?" I ask for clarification. I begin thinking that maybe I didn't hear her correctly, but then she nods. "But Nessie, he's six years older than you."

"I know. I know." She shrugs nonchalantly as if this is no big deal when it truly is.

"Tell me you two haven't..." I trail off, fearing the worse. Their age difference really concerns me. She is, of course, a senior in high school and very mature for her age, but I still worry.

"No, of course not. He's been a complete gentleman." She gets a faraway look in her eyes that tell me her feelings for him run deep. I decide then to let her be happy and to try my best not to say anything negative about Jacob or their relationship.

"I want you to be careful." I turn to her, pinning her with a serious look. She stops walking and looks at me. "Of course, you can't talk to Elena about boys, but you can always call me."

She smiles and nods before throwing one arm over my shoulder.

"You should be considered my little sister, Bells. You're so short." Vanessa says.

She towers over me at five foot nine, and I'm sure she won't let me forget it.

"So, Bella, what brings you to visit us unannounced? Are you in need of money?" Elena asks from her spot at the kitchen table looking over at me standing in the entryway of the kitchen.

Confused by her assumption and why she would make such an outlandish statement, my brow furrows and I open my mouth to correct her. As I begin to speak, she cuts me off quickly.

"No, of course not. Your father made sure that you were well taken care of when he died." She says bitterly, and I cringe, realizing that she is starting our visit with this bullshit. Usually, she'd wait until she's had quite a few glasses of wine before starting in on me. Even through the phone, I could tell when she's had too much.

Just as the thought enters my mind, my eyes roll toward the countertop, and I notice a half-empty bottle of wine.

"Never mind the fact that he left his wife and daughter to starve to death."

"Mother!" Vanessa chides angrily, shooting me a sympathetic glance.

"If it had not been for my good friend Esme moving in to help out with bills a few years ago, I'm sure Vanessa and I would surely be living on the streets and you never once bothered to throw us even a buck." She says before standing to walk over to the counter where the wine is.

"So dramatic," Esme says with the shake of her head. "Don't let her guilt-trip you, Bella."

"All she does is talk about how much she misses you and now that you're finally visiting, she's acting like a total bitch!" Vanessa is raging mad, and everyone notices. Vanessa doesn't easily throw around curse words.

"Look, I know I-" I begin, but apparently my words aren't important.

"You weren't even going to invite us to your wedding were you?" Elena asks as she pours a glass of wine and tosses it back. "We're family." She slurs the words, showing just how drunk she's allowed herself to get. "Me and Vanessa!" She points between them. "We're all you have left, and you treat us like shit."

"That's not true," Vanessa says in a small voice.

"It is true. Now the gold-digger is about to marry a rich son of a bitch, and she'll really forget about us then." Elena stumbles toward her chair, and just when she's about to drink from her glass, Esme snatches it away.

"You've had enough. Perhaps you should take a nap, yeah?" She asks Elena, who pouts but nods and even willingly stands when Esme offers an arm to help steady her.

As soon as they are out of earshot, Vanessa begins to rant. "You didn't deserve that! She's so... ugh! I don't know what her problem is."

"I hurt her by staying away. I get it."

"I get why you stayed away. She's horrible! I spend most of my days away from this house just to avoid her."

"It's not that bad," I say before crossing the room to pour myself a glass of wine.

"Not that bad? God! She's driven you to drink!" Vanessa shrieks. "Has it always been like that? Has she always been that horrible to you?"

"Really it's nothing, it's..."

"Unless you're used to being verbally abused, I don't see how you can stand it. Why don't you fight back, Bells?"

"I'm not a fighter. I've never been one. I avoid these kinds of situations. I hate confrontation."

"Well, you can't let her talk to you like that. You can't let anyone talk to you like that."

I nod, staring into my glass, hating what she's implying.

"Look at you. You're completely numb to her behavior as if you're used to someone berating you."

"My fiancée is quite the disciplinary," I say before quickly gulping down my wine. Only then do I realize what I said. "Ex-fiancee I mean."

Vanessa walks over to me, her heels clicking on the tile floor.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asks with a hand to my back.

With a heavy sigh, I launch into my story. She listens intently, never interrupting, but her face says enough.

By the end, her hand is covering her mouth, and she is all but speechless.

"Wait, so you think he's in on it?" Vanessa asks in a whisper as if it's a secret.

"That's what Demetri said." I shrug, having not given it much thought as a way to ignore the pain.

"But do you think he would do that? From what you told me Bells, Edward adores you. Demetri treats you like, like-"

"Like his property."

Her eyes widen, and she points at me. "Yes! Exactly!"

"That's all I am to him. A prize, a possession..." I trail off only now realizing how true the words are. "But I don't doubt that he loves me."

"What about Edward?"

I shrug again, ignoring the lump that forms in my throat as I speak. "What about him?"

"What will you do?"

"The only thing I can do. Let them both go. I should be alone. I deserve it for all the back and forth and the cheating. If Edward is a part of Alice's plan, it's still my fault. I still cheated. He didn't force me to do that."

"But you two fell in love. Maybe it was never planned... but that doesn't stop it from being real."

Just then, Esme appears in the kitchen. "She's out for a few hours." Esme sighs and throws herself in the seat across from me. "She is a piece of work."

"That she is," I mumble under my breath, pouring another glass of wine.

Esme sighs exasperatedly leading me to believe that she heard me.

"She loves you both very much." Esme's eyes plead with me to be understanding, which is unnecessary. I simply do not care enough for anything Elena says to make it bother me.

With a slow nod, my eyes steady on my glass I respond. "I know."

We are in silence for a second locked away in our own individual thoughts. Esme is the one to break the silence before it becomes awkward.

"My son and I had a similar adjustment years ago." She says out of the blue. My eyes flash with curiosity as I become intrigued by where she is taking the conversation. "I remarried after my first husband died. The man that I remarried had a son a little older than my son. Even though my husband's son isn't my own blood, I still love him unconditionally. The same goes for Elena. Every second of every day she is reminding me of your accomplishments-"

"It's annoying." Vanessa pipes in rolling her eyes. "She wants me to be just like you. If I'm not as good as you, I'm a failure."

"Vanessa!" Esme tsks, shaking her head. I don't quite like Elena comparing Vanessa to me.

"It's true! She was Valedictorian in high school and graduated college Summa Cum Laude."

"I didn't do anything with my college degree." I shrug off her comment.

"Who cares? You're marrying a millionaire!" Vanessa shouts and then her eyes widen when she takes in my frozen state.

Esme looks between us and then turns her concerned eyes on me.

I clear my throat and stand tall as I respond with conviction, standing by my decision.

"I'm not getting married, Nessie."

"I know, I know! I forgot, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." She looks down at her hands chastising herself.

"Elena said you were marrying-" Esme begins, but I cut her off quickly not wanting to hear his name.

"I called it off," I tell her, then take a breath as I prepare to explain. "I fell in love." My voice cracks as I feel tears prick the back of my eyes and clog my throat. I gulp quickly and begin again. "I fell in love with someone else. Someone I didn't know well, and it turns out he's as big a liar and manipulator as my ex."

Esme's face crumbles before my eyes. She is such a sympathizer. It's as if she feels everyone else's pain so acutely as if were her own.

"I'm so sorry, Bella."

"Serves me right. You're never supposed to leave someone for someone else." I feel a tear trickle down my face because the words literally hurt to say.

Vanessa stands and wraps an arm around me, laying her head on my shoulder.

"I'm not sad!" I all but snap at her, only to quickly regret it. I take a breath. "I am only disappointed. I thought what we had was real." I explain more in depth.

"You and Demetri, or you and Edward?" Vanessa asks in a small voice.

"Edward. I wanted it to be real. I felt like I was finally becoming myself again."

I hear a tap on the table and look over to see Esme smiling at me. "Tell me about this Edward."

I really don't want to relive our very short relationship out loud, but the look on Esme's face is so hopeful I take a seat and open up as I did with Vanessa.

Her eyes widen with each passing minute as I tell her first how we met and then how he was so easy to fall in love with. I explained that it wasn't just his looks that did me in, but his personality, his way of knowing just what I want or need without me having to ever voice it. He made me feel special, loved and important.

"He sounds lovely Bella. So what's the problem?"

"He lied!" I raise my voice, and she doesn't flinch one bit at my harsh tone. However, I feel terrible afterward. "He's a liar! He lied to me! I don't like this feeling!" Right then is when the tears begin, and I am no longer strong enough to hold them at bay. "He betrayed me," I whisper, my voice cracking with the sheer force of my heartbreak.

Esme grabs my hand across the table and squeezes. "You need to talk to him."

I snatch my hand away. "So that he can fill my head with more lies? He's in my head. I'm so sure I'll believe him no matter what he says."

"Then how will you ever know the truth?" Esme asks.

I shake my head, trying to ignore her words and the truth in them.

"You're not even going to give him a chance to explain himself, Bella?" This time, it's Vanessa, who speaks in a small voice.

"I didn't come here to be lectured okay. I came here to visit you guys. I don't want to talk about this anymore." I wipe away my tears and stand; quickly walking up the stairs to Vanessa's room hoping she doesn't follow.

I need to be alone.

Bella Pov

The next morning I wake to the smell of pancakes and immediately perk up. I'd fallen asleep in Vanessa's king size bed without eating dinner last night, so I woke pretty early with a growling stomach.

After brushing my teeth and taking a too hot shower, I riffle through Vanessa's closet for something to wear. I'd been in such a rush to leave yesterday, I didn't have any clothing with me for the day.

"Thank God we're the same size," I mumble more to myself as my eyes set on a very pretty blue sundress.

"You still have a bit of clothing in the other room. Esme refuses to throw out your things. She even left the room practically the same." I hear Vanessa grumble from the bed still half-asleep.

"Really? Wow!" I hold the dress up to my body as I look in the mirror. "No this is my dress now. It's so me."

"You can have it." Vanessa waves her hand dismissively and rolls over, her back to me.

After changing, I brush my crazy hair and make my way down the stairs, turning the corner to the kitchen. Esme is there slaving over the stove while Elena dances in the kitchen to 80s music, sipping out of a mug.

"You always were so chipper in the mornings," I say as I make my way to the table, grabbing the newspaper as I sit.

"There's no reason to not be chipper. I'm alive." She holds her arms up in the air and smiles widely.

"Always so dramatic," Esme says, turning to place a plate in front of me. "Enjoy!"

The plate is filled with eggs, bacon, toast and orange slices. Beside it, she slides over a glass of orange juice. I instantly dive in, as the aroma of food causes my stomach to growl angrily.

"I guess it's only fair you feed the guest first," Elena says as she takes a seat beside me taking a long gulp of coffee studying me above her mug. Her blue eyes are full of curiosity, which is a change of pace. Last night they held so much bitterness, and I'm not sure I'm in the right mind frame to accept her abuse.

"So Bella." She begins, placing her mug down, her eyes set on the motion as she squirms in her seat. "How has my darling step-daughter been?"

I nod twice with a half-hearted smile. "I'm good. I'm great actually. Never better."

"Really?" Her eyes widen as her smile does. "Well, that's wonderful." She pats my hand. "I honestly thought you came here because you were running away from something..." She trails off giving me a sidelong glance as she again takes a drink from her mug. "Or maybe someone."

"No, I just wanted a change of scenery, and I missed you guys so..." I trail off, looking anywhere but into her deep blue gaze set on picking my brain.

"It took you this long to miss us? No phone calls either." She tsks a few times and holds her mug right in front of her mouth.

I chew my food before I respond to her.

"The phone works both ways, Elena. You could have called. Hell, you could've visited me. I was the one busting my ass in college." My voice rises a bit with each sentence, and she doesn't once flinch away.

"The past two years you have had no excuse. You have simply been avoiding us."

"Avoiding you," I mumble under my breath, but I have no doubt that she heard me.

Her smirk confirms that she enjoys our banter because I usually keep calm as she does. Vanessa doesn't put up with her bullshit. By now, Vanessa would have snapped and run out of the room. I have had years of handling my stepmother, and now, even with the separation, I'm sure I'm still a pro.

"Morning beautiful people," Vanessa says as she makes her way down the stairs. As she reaches the bottom step, I see her squinting out of the window.

"There's a smokin' hot guy outside smoking a cigarette by our mailbox." She says, pointing her finger in the guy's direction.

"Oh yes. Bella, do you have a stalker of some sort? I told him in so many ways to get lost but he just won't. He's been there since six this morning."

"Elena you told me it was no one," Esme says with her hand on her hip chastising her friend.

"It is no one. Bella would not be in the company of such a man. He has quite a beard, and he reeks of cigarette smoke."

I'm curious now as to who it is so I stand and make my way over to the window.

Standing there with a cigarette between his lips, the other hand in his pocket his back slightly humped…is Edward.

* * *

Thank you so much for taking the time to help me with this story Sunflower Fran, you are the best! :)


	18. Chapter 18

Sunflower Fran is doing a spectacular job on this story. I'm so thankful for all her help.

Bella Pov

"Edward." I breathe softly, my eyes filling with tears.

As if feeling my eyes on him he looks up and meets my gaze through the window. He immediately tosses his cigarette and bolts toward the house. Seconds later, he's knocking on the door.

"Bella!" He shouts as he knocks on the door.

My heart thunders in my chest and time seems to slow as I glance around at the women in the room. I'm not sure what I'm looking for in their expressions, but they give me the push I need to open the door.

The instant I open the door do, our eyes collide with each other and my already racing heart threatens to burst from my chest.

We stand still staring at each with my hand on the door, his arms both braced on either side of its frame. His broad shoulders stretched magnificently in his blue shirt displaying muscles that weren't quite there when we first met. I'd noticed before that he was bulking up and utilizing the hell out of Carlisle's gym, but I never stood back to appreciate the sight. Usually, I'm too caught up in how handsome he is.

He straightens after what feels like hours, which may only have been seconds; I'm not sure.

"Hi." He says in a low voice that practically shatters my resolve. I hadn't quite decided what I'd say when we actually had to have a conversation, but I knew I wanted to have the upper hand. Of course, I should have known that wouldn't happen when it comes to Edward. He has a way of knocking me off my feet while being the very same one I need to right me.

"Hi." Is my very quiet response, full of hesitation. I'm not particularly a shy person, but for some reason, that's how the singular word escapes my lips.

We stand staring even after our greeting, eyes locked and unwilling to look away.

"Okay, we'll just..." Vanessa walks in front of me toward the kitchen, but our trance still isn't broken. "Go. "I hear her talking in hush tones. "They need privacy." Vanessa whisper-shouts, which does, in fact, break me out of my trance.

Edward clears his throat and takes a step toward me as he lowers his arms, his brows drawn tightly together.

"Can I come in?" He asks and I nod, words are literally failing me at the moment.

He walks into the house closer to me than what's necessary and doesn't stop his approach. I take several strides back until I feel the bottom step, and I stumble. He grabs me around the waist and pulls me to his chest.

"We need to talk," I say and he nods, seemingly distracted by my body. He rests his hands on my hips and leans into me, placing kisses along my neck, sighing in relief with each one that he gives.

My breathing hitches and my eyes fall closed instantly as I am apparently brain dead in his presence. I shouldn't be allowing this to happen, but it feels so good. I inhale and become intoxicated by his woodsy scent. It's taking everything in me not to grab his hair and do very indecent things to him right here, right now.

But then reality suddenly hits me and my eyes fly open. How is he here? How did he know I would be here? where I would be? I am so lost and thrown off by him being here, my mind hasn't stopped racing since the second I saw him. I can't even filter through all the thoughts because there are too many.

"First, I need to kiss you." He says as he lowers his face to mine. My eyes widen, but I'm frozen in his arms. I can't focus, I can't think, and as I stare up and into his deep green eyes, I realize then that I also can't breathe.

His lips slowly slant over mine as he pulls me closer, his arms enveloping me in his warm embrace. He's tender at first, but as the kiss progresses, we both become needy. I grip onto his shirt for dear life and hold him to me. His hand moves behind my neck and into my hair holding my head in place, while the other wraps tighter around my back. He kisses me deeply, invading my mouth with his greedy tongue causing me to grow light-headed. I gasp loudly, and my eyes pop open when I realize just how badly I need to breathe. He pulls back to let me breathe, but just as quickly kisses me again as if he just can't help himself. The soft press of his lips one last time makes my eyes flutter shut.

This time, when he pulls back, my head is swimming, and my eyes slowly blink open breaking the fog of lust surrounding me.

He presses his forehead to mine. "You ran out on me twice in one day. I really needed that kiss. I needed you in my arms. I just needed ... you."

He pulls back to search my eyes looking deep into my soul for the cause of my departure and at that moment I'm very sure that he has no idea that I know what he did.

He tucks a stray hair behind my ear and waits. Apparently, I have to come right out and say it.

"Demetri told me," I say in a small voice, hating myself for sounding so unsure of myself. I should be furious at him, but honestly, I can't find it in myself to be upset. I just want to understand. I want the truth.

He looks at me with his brows set in confusion. "I don't understand."

"He told me about you and Alice. About the bet."

I watch as guilt registers in his expression, and I'm ready to react, but then I see the confusion.

He looks down, shaking his head with brows deeply drawn together. "There's no bet."

I wish he wouldn't make me ask all of the questions. I just want him to come right out with the truth because it's what I deserve. If he truly loves me, he would be honest.

"Edward, just tell me the truth." I try to take a step back, but it's impossible, and I think he can sense that I'm ready to bolt because he grabs my upper arms and levels me with a stare.

"You may have to spell it out for me love, because I honestly have no idea what you're talking about." Earnestly he shakes his head.

"The bet between Alice and Demetri," I say slowly, trying once again to jog his memory. "The one where you break up our relationship so Alice can win a house, or car, or whatever fucked up thing you all planned."

"I swear to you that I had no idea there was a bet and I am in no way involved."

"So why would he say that?" Even as I ask the question, I know how silly it sounds. Of course, Demetri isn't a reliable source.

Edward releases me and takes several strides away from me until his back is against the opposite wall.

"Where did you come from? Why don't you ever talk about your family? Why-"

Edward cuts me off, obviously irritated by my line of questioning because his usually placid attitude is out the window.

"That has nothing to do with us, Bella! I have told you everything that is relevant to my life as of now! The past is-"

"It's a part of you!" I shout a bit louder than I mean to, but it's become hard to stay in control of my emotions. I'm so lost right now, and I don't know what to believe. I just want him to deny everything so that we can go back to the way things were before.

I take a deep cleansing breath and try to say it again in a much calmer tone. "The past is a part of who you are, Edward. Why can't you see that?"

"But it doesn't get to affect our relationship. It doesn't get to take you away from me!"

He sags back against the wall as if all energy has been drained with his words. "I can't lose you, I-" I look up in time to see him shake his head. "I just got my chance with you."

The look on his handsome face breaks me down, and I just want to comfort him. All my anger falls away, and my feet move without much thought until I'm in front of him. I grab his face in my hands and force him to look at me.

"You won't," I tell him and watch as his shoulders visible sag in relief. "But you need to tell me everything, Edward. I need to know the truth. All of it."

He takes a deep breath and runs a hand through his hair. Then he drops his head back against the wall looking at the ceiling, and he closes his eyes.

"Alice asked me to break up your wedding, yes, but I didn't know anything about a bet. I swear."

"You knew I was engaged when you met me?" The words leave my lips before my brain can even process what he's admitted to. "You knew before I said anything."

He looks down at me just as I'm taking a step away from him. I wanted the truth, but it's hard to hear. He reaches for me, but I hold my hands out to stop him.

"You knew everything about me, didn't you?"

"No. I specifically told Alice that I needed to learn about you on my own. I wanted that privilege."

A lone tear falls down my cheek. "Privilege," I say sarcastically, smiling at the irony. "I'm so stupid. You all were playing a game with my life."

"She knew that I loved you. She knew that I wouldn't hurt you-"

"You didn't even know me."

"Yes, Bella I did. I-" He takes a deep breath, and licks his lips. I can practically see his brain working overtime. "I don't know how to tell you this but-" He looks around searching for the right words and finally he says the last thing I ever expected him to say.

"I'm Ben."

"You're... What?" I have no idea what he's talking about. "I don't understand."

"I'm-I'm the guy you were writing about." With his words, my whole world freezes. I take several steps back until my feet hit the steps. Using the railing of the stairs I slowly slide myself down to the bottom. There is only one word to describe how I feel. Devastated. I feel as if my world is crashing around me and I don't know how to fix it.

"But you were... Weren't you homeless?"

Edward comes over, sits next to me and grabs my hand.

"I was going to tell you. I was always going to tell you, believe me. Things just got-"

"Messy?" I ask, and he sighs.

"I was going to say complicated, but yes."

"I can't believe this," I whisper to myself.

"I wasn't trying to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you."

"Then what were you trying to do?"

Edward lifts my chin and tenderly runs his thumb against my cheek. "Love you. I only wanted to love you the way you deserved."

"What made you think I wasn't already? I was engaged."

"You didn't look happy." Is his brilliant response. I roll my eyes and start to stand because my understanding and patience is wavering. He grabs my other hand and squeezes them both. "You didn't have the look of a newly engaged woman. And because Alice told me you weren't happy."

"She just coached you through everything, didn't she?" I scoff, annoyed that I'm even in this situation. "And for what?"

"Look, Bella, I don't know what she hoped to accomplish by asking for my help. She seemed like a concerned friend who didn't want you with her asshole of a cousin. I did it because otherwise, I would never, ever, have a chance with you. I wanted you for myself. "My heart fluttered at his sweet words, but I'm still so hurt I can't help but dwell on the fact that he's been lying to me.

Edward squeezes my hand to gain my full attention. "I wanted- I needed a chance with you."

I don't know what to say at this point. I am actually speechless.

"I'm sorry that I lied, I'm sorry that things have happened the way that they have, but I don't regret a thing. I don't regret finding you. I don't regret our time together because I fell so hard for you, Bella. Harder than I thought was possible." He places his hand over his chest and looks deep into my eyes and just like that, everything in my world is all right. He's so earnest, and passionate, I can't help but think that I will never again be loved the way he loves me.

But is it enough?

"Bella, say something. I don't know what you're thinking."

I let out a humorless laugh trying to make sense of my swirling thoughts, but it's proving to be impossible.

"Please, say something." He pleads with his words and his ever-earnest eyes beg me to open up to him, but I don't know how. I don't know how I feel right now and I don't want to say the wrong thing.

"You should go." It's my survival technique and it's a selfish one, but I can't be around him right now. I can't...

He doesn't say anything for the longest time, and I almost think he didn't hear me, but the devastated look on his face tells me otherwise. Finally, in a small voice, he asks, "What?"

"I'd like you to go." As I stand, he grabs my hand and stands with me. "I need to figure things out ... alone."

His head drops, and he releases my hand, accepting my wishes. "Okay. You figure things out, and then you come back to me." He leans forward and kisses my forward before walking to the door. He opens it and is about to leave when I stop him.

"But first ..."He turns back to me and shuts the door. "I need to know how you found me."

He looks away uncomfortably. "Alice-"

"Of course it was Alice. She can't stand the thought of losing her bet."

"Alice is a good person." He says to me, and that's when my patience gives way to anger.

"Don't do that. Don't pretend to know Alice because you don't. Before yesterday I thought I knew her, but I don't."

"Okay." He nods. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to upset you."

"I'm not upset, I'm confused and-" I turn away from him, trying to compose myself. "I don't know what I am!"

We're both silent for a long time with my back to him. I can't look at him for fear of giving in without thinking this through.

"You really should go, Edward. You're only making this harder on me." Even while pushing him away I don't want him to go, but I know that he should. It just seems like something a person in my situation should do. I have to make sure that his deceit is something we could possibly move past. I have to make sure that I'm making the right decision.

I hear him sigh, but there's no movement behind me. I turn back to face him, ready to force him out when Esme comes around the corner, smoothing down her apron.

When she looks up, and she sees me, a kind smile spreads across her face. "I heard the door and assumed your guest left."

Then she steps further into the entry way and sees my 'guest' and freezes. I look at Edward to see that he is completely stunned as well.

"Edward?" She says in a shaky voice, tears brimming her eyes. "Oh my goodness, it's you."

I take a step back to observe, feeling even more confused than I was a moment ago.

"I thought-" She says to herself, moving closer to Edward who still hasn't moved from his place by the door. It doesn't look as if he's done much breathing either. "No one said so, but I thought you were dead. We looked for you-"

"I was better on my own. I'm glad you never found me."

Esme looks down, her shoulders dropping in shame. "Emmett said that he spoke to you."

"Emmett?" I ask quite loudly, and they both look over at me. I didn't mean to say that aloud, I was only trying to follow the conversation and put all the pieces to this puzzle together.

"Emmett is my son." She says to me and then looks to Edward and smiles. At that point, I fully understand the connection and my eyes widen as I piece together what Edward has told me about his past.

"And so is Edward."

* * *

Do you think Edward is being a little harsh?


	19. Chapter 19

Hi everyone! This chapter was edited by Sunflower Fran. She worked her magic and I hope you all like it. Happy Holidays! :)

* * *

Bella Pov

Edward and Esme took their tense conversation outside as I nervously paced the living room, peeking out of the window at them every so often, wondering how he's taking all of this. I'm worried about him, and nervous about how their conversation will go.

I want nothing more than to comfort him, and to be the rock I know he needs at the moment. From what I can tell, it seems this is taking quite a toll on him. Now that I have pieced everything together in my head, I can see why their reunion is an emotional one.

I am beating myself up for not being able to set aside my pride and be there for him when I know he'd do it for me regardless of what I might have done to hurt him.

I look out the window once more to see him with both hands atop his head as he paces in front of a very distraught Esme. Then he turns abruptly with his arms outstretched and says something to her that makes her cry. He watches her for a moment before going to her and wrapping her in a loving hug that squeezes at my heart.

I watch Edward rein in his anger and push aside his hurt to comfort his mother. The woman he felt abandoned him when he needed her most. And I know right then that I was right. He would set aside his own hurt, pain or discomfort for the ones he loves. And if I love him the same, then I should be able to do that, too.

I make my way outside and slowly walk to them. As I'm approaching, Edward looks up and smiles a sad smile.

When he pulls back from the hug, Esme quickly wipes her eyes and then smiles at me much like her son had.

"So this is the man you were speaking of?" She asks, trying to disguise her sniffles.

"Yes." My smile is genuine as I wrap my arm around Edward's waist and hug up next to my tall, rugged man.

"I must tell you." She begins, her eyes fixed on Edward with pride. "I missed much of his life, but if I know one thing about my son, it's he loves fiercely."

Edward doesn't shy away from his mother's praise, he welcomes it. I look up at him for a moment, and when he finally looks at me, I respond. "I know that about him too."

"Well, you said you have to go, and I understand, but we should have dinner soon," Esme says to Edward who all of a sudden looks extremely uncomfortable.

"I don't know." He rocks back on his heels and rubs the back of his neck. He makes a gesture with his free hand outstretched toward her. "Like I told Emmett; I'm not exactly ready for that."

"I understand." She nods and looks over at me trying to smile, but her lips tremble. "When you are, you know where to find me. Just know that I love you, Edward, and I never stopped."

Edward doesn't speak for the longest time; he doesn't even nod. It's as if he blanked out the last few seconds of the conversation. There's nothing on his face that suggests he heard a word she'd said. She notices, and offers a supportive smile realizing how hard it must be for him.

Then, as quick as lightning, he turns and begins walking to Alice's car parked near the mailbox. Great! Alice even let him use her car.

"Edward," I call after him as my feet begin to move trying to catch up. I grab his arm, and he stops. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Bella." He slowly wiggles out of my hold. "I'll see you later." Then he begins to walk again, but I quickly catch up.

"I'm coming with you."

"You need time to think." He says almost bitterly, and I blink at him, saddened by his cold behavior. "And so do I." He looks away and curses under his breath. "I shouldn't have come here."

"I'm glad you did."

He gives me a skeptical look and then shakes his head. "Go inside. I'll see you later."

"I told you already. I'm coming with you."

"I need to be alone." He fires back, and now I'm confused. Why won't he let me comfort him?

"Don't do that Edward. Don't push me away when you need me most."

"Why not? If I don't push you away, you'll end up leaving anyway." He mumbles. "Everyone does." And my heart breaks for the little boy that lost so much, so young.

I step in front of him and cup his face in my hands. "That is not true." He tries to look up, but I hold his face firmly between my hands. "It's not."

He stares into my eyes for a few long seconds looking for sincerity and then nods when he finds what he's looking for. I hope he also sees how much I love him because nothing could stand in the way of that. Not even my hurt.

I pull him down for a hug, wrapping my arms around his neck, and I see that Esme has just been standing there watching with tears in her eyes.

I smile at her, and she returns it even through her tears before walking into the house.

Edward Pov

"You mean to tell me that you drove Alice's car without a license?" Bella asks from her place in the driver's seat.

I was embarrassed to tell her I didn't know how to drive, but she knows the truth about me, so I don't feel as weird about it. Everything should make sense to her now.

"I don't exactly know how to drive."

She playfully hits my bicep; her eyes and mouth open wide in shock. "Then how did you get to me?"

"I winged it. I had to see you." I answer with a shrug, glancing out of the corner of my eye trying to see her expression but not actually wanting to see it in case it's too soon for me to say something like that.

Bella is known for running away.

Instead of looking shell-shocked or upset, she has the most adorable smile on her face.

With her hand on her chest, she says, "That is the most romantic thing I have ever heard." Then she hits me again and gasps as if she's having an afterthought. "What if something would've happened to you? You could've died."

The thought had occurred to me, but I figured I would have to pay the consequences either way. I needed to know that we were okay, and I couldn't wait another day.

"I picked up the concept fairly quickly. It's not that difficult."

"Still, you don't have a license. Anything could have happened." She turns the key in the ignition and puts on her seatbelt without a word. Then something occurs to her. "Alice doesn't know that you can't drive."

"How do you know that?"

She gives me a look that says she knows what she's talking about. "She let you drive her Porsche. She wouldn't do that if she knew you could possibly wreck it."

"I may have lied, and she was half asleep when I asked."

Bella laughs at this as she pulls away from the curb and onto the road. We're silent for a few long seconds, and when I chance a look at her face, she looks deep in thought.

"You're not afraid-"

"Do you know what-"

We both speak at the same time, and then when our curious eyes meet, we share a laugh.

"You first," I tell her, and she slowly lets out a breath before speaking, her hands gripping the steering wheel a little tighter.

"Do you know what they bet?" She asks her voice low and unsure.

I open my mouth, ready to reiterate the fact that I had no idea a bet even existed before today when my phone rings.

With a deep sigh, I pull the phone from my pocket, and Emmett's name flashes across the screen. I feel Bella's eyes on me, watching as I wrestle with the idea of ignoring my brother's call.

"Who is it?"

Tugging at my hair with my free hand, I respond. "Emmett."

The phone continues to ring in my hand, and I just stare at it.

What could he possibly have to say to me? Our conversation over lunch was forced and awkward, no matter how hard Emmett tried to lighten the mood with endless jokes. I'm just not ready to let him into my life. I thought I'd made it abundantly clear that when I was ready, I would call him.

"Aren't you going to answer?" Bella's question brings me back to the fact that the phone is still ringing. I blink a few times, hit ignore and pocket the phone.

Then I shake off my bad mood and turn my attention back to my girl. "What were you saying?"

She looks over at me and blinks a few times, utterly confused by the shift in the air, and the switch in my mood. "Why won't you talk to Emmett?"

I lift a shoulder in a shrug, "I'm not ready."

She nods her head, remaining on my side when it comes to this situation. Even though she doesn't agree with it. "I'll call him later."

Her head snaps to the side to look at me, and there's a smile on her face so big, so bright, it physically hurts to look at her. I'll do anything to keep that smile on her beautiful face.

"Promise?" She asks with that same smile, but with her eyes back on the road.

"I promise baby. Now tell me, what were you talking about earlier?"

Her brows furrow for a short second, but then realization dawns on her. "About the bet." She says, then without waiting for a response, she asks her earlier question. "Do you know what they bet?"

"Of course not. You're the one that told me about the bet. I had no idea."

She nods with pursed lips, considering my answer. "It may not show, because I'm hiding it behind all of my unanswered questions, but I'm so angry."

"That's understandable, baby. I need you to understand that I never meant to hurt you."

"It's not you." She takes a deep breath. "You didn't bet on my life. This is on Alice and Demetri, and God I want them to feel just a piece of what I felt today. I wish there were some way to get back at them."

"Baby..." I grab her hand and squeeze, trying to show her support, let her know that I'm here for her and she can draw strength from me in these trying times, but under no circumstance do I agree to play games and get back at someone. It's childish, and I have already had too much of that in my life. I'm ready for a mature relationship. "We should just move forward and decide whether or not to remain friends with Alice. It's your decision."

"I need to do this Edward. Honestly, even if it's just to get more information before exposing them. I doubt they will tell me everything if I just come right out and ask. I need to learn everything on my own and then decide what I want to do with that information."

I hear what she's saying, but I don't agree with it. However, if she thinks this is what she needs to do, then I won't stop her. She will have to learn on her own.

"So what are you going to do?"

She sighs and sits in deep thought for long seconds before finally speaking. "Alice doesn't know that I know who you really are, and Demetri knows that I know about the bet, but he doesn't know who you really are or how you're connected, right?"

I shrug, thinking over everything she's said before replying. "It's only a matter of time before he finds out who I am."

"But by then, I should have everything I need."

"I don't want this to blow up in our face and ruin us, baby. I just got you... I-" I take a breath, and she takes the opportunity to assure me.

"Edward, I love you. I'm not going anywhere."

Her words cause my heart to beat faster, and an involuntary smile to spread across my face. I'm relieved she still feels the same way about me even though she knows who I really am and how we were set up.

She sighs when I don't respond. "You don't have to do anything, Edward. Just pretend that nothing has changed. Let Alice think our relationship hasn't progressed, and I'll let Demetri think I'm done with you after the information he told me. He'll think he won, but I'll be using him for information."

Skeptical of the whole ordeal, I reply solemnly. "What do we get out of this?"

"The satisfaction of knowing that we won, and they lost." She says it as if it's the most obvious conclusion to draw, but it's not so clear and I know for sure she's not thinking of any consequences.

I decide to point out a major flaw in her plan. "But Alice is going to win because you're mine. What does Alice have to lose?"

She glances over at me and with a straight face, she says …

"My friendship."


End file.
